Choosing NS or another baby, or both?

allthingsbright · Jan 8, 2008

Well, thats a pretty personal decision--my take on it is that I would try to decrease the amount of stress in my life prior to and during nursing school--in other words, I would wait until I'm done w/ school to have any more kids. I just finished my nursing degree and it was stressful enough w/out adding another kid in the mix. Lots of classmates waited until the last semester to get pregnant and are actually starting new jobs with babies on the way...that can be stressful, too. The 3 classmates I know of who had babies during school were VERY stressed and worn out--even more so than the rest of us.

Also, it may take a while for you to get pregnant. Best wishes whatever you decide! :)

gagezoie · Jan 8, 2008

Many of us do it all the time. If you have a good support system (daddy will get up at night sometimes) and you will be able to find time to study then go for it. If you think you can do it go for it. Nursing will always be around if you are unable to swing it. Follow your heart. :redpinkhe

birdgardner · Jan 8, 2008

Nursing is always going to be there - your fertility is another question - you need to consider your age and how easy conceiving was before. Your organization skills, your stamina after childbirth, your experience with "baby brain", your commute...

I am in an accelerated BSN program now and can't imagine doing it with a tiny little baby - you would be with it just a few hours a day - maybe a 1 or 2 y.o. I have four children; the youngest will be 6 in a month. My best friend in the program dropped out; she has five children between 3 and 10, and that was part of the strain for her.

Trying to figure how you will see your decision in ten years is a good idea. I wish I could have another child but I went ahead with the BSN because, for me, being something besides a wife and mother was more necessary than having another child.

Peace and blessings, whatever you decide.

scastillo1 · Jan 8, 2008

I wish I could have another child but I went ahead with the BSN because, for me, being something besides a wife and mother was more necessary than having another child.

What you said right here is EXACTLY how I feel. If I had to choose between the two, I would choose the BSN just like you. I need to have more than being a wife and mother. I need to be challenged and fufilled in other ways. But I am starting to question if doing both is realistic or not. Thanks for the input everyone.

martymoose, BSN, RN · Jan 8, 2008

of course this is my opinion , but based on experience: i would have chosen to have my family first had i known ahead of time i was going to suffer secondary infertility. i chose school, thinking since i had such an easy time conceiving my son(1st time) that i had time to go to school( cause i was also losing my job) then ttc again. well, after almost 3 yrs, all tests normal, injects drugs, etc, i have nothing to blame but age. and i was your age when i started that decision.had i had the chance to do it all over again, i would have tried for the 2nd child then instead of school. you can go to school anytime- you never know if you might suffer infertility. i completely regret to this day my decisions. hope you make the right decicion for you. good luck.

CHATSDALE · Jan 8, 2008

like choosing someone's SO very personal choice

getting into nursing school is getting harder if you put child on hold other children will be a little older and can do more for themselves

what ever you choose, good luck

futurecnm · Jan 8, 2008

I would wait until after NS. I think it would be VERY difficult to get through NS, especially an accel program with a new baby. At least wait until you are closer to being done before getting pg. That is my opinion and what I would do. I have a hard enough time with my 2 yr AD program and a 7 and 5 yr old!! Some people have had babies and it can be done, but they say it is VERY hard and they sometimes struggle finding time to study and get everything done, as well as leaving a newborn for many hours while they are at school or clinical. I think it would be ok to be pg while in school, as long as you don't suffer from horrible morning sickness (as I do when I'm pg). I have 2 kids and if I decide to have a 3rd it will be after I start working.

Music in My Heart · Jan 8, 2008

Would I be crazy to think I could have a baby (I also have a 4 and 6 year old) and still complete the accelerated program?

An accelerated program is going to take A LOT of time and energy, much more than a conventional program.

Can you still do it with a baby and little kids? I'm sure that some people have but you're not going to have nearly as much time with your kids as you'd probably like nor as much time for school as you'd like.

I'd also suggest that as you add more and more external responsibilities and distractions, your performance in school will suffer proportionately.

Lastly, I'd say that for each additional item "on your plate," the odds of completion drop somewhat.

Only you can evaluate your own abilities, your support network, and your own minimum standards of performance as a student.

Personally, I wouldn't try it. My wife works part time and we have one child (age 6) who's in kindergarten. Even though I'm a very strong student, it's going to be an enormous challenge to meet my obligations to my family and still attain my goals in my accelerated program. I can't even imagine trying to do it with an infant.

Best wishes to you whatever you decide. As in all things, follow your heart.

oramar · Jan 8, 2008

If you had no kids I would tell you to go ahead and have one if you really wanted to. But you have two beautiful children already, you can easily complete the program and then have another. If you have a third you are going to absolutely have a very hard time with the nursing program. I would never say this to anyone contemplating having a baby while in nursing school because it would be none of my business. But since you ask I am telling my opinion and it is wait to have third child till after you complete program. It is a statistically proven fact that pregnancy is a major reason for dropping out of nursing programs. Yes, some people make it but it takes an extraordinary effort.

vashtee, RN · Jan 8, 2008

I believe in not spreading yourself too thin. Pick one thing at a time and excel at it. You already have two children; surely a third can wait a couple of years.

oramar · Jan 8, 2008

of course this is my opinion , but based on experience: i would have chosen to have my family first had i known ahead of time i was going to suffer secondary infertility. i chose school, thinking since i had such an easy time conceiving my son(1st time) that i had time to go to school( cause i was also losing my job) then ttc again. well, after almost 3 yrs, all tests normal, injects drugs, etc, i have nothing to blame but age. and i was your age when i started that decision.had i had the chance to do it all over again, i would have tried for the 2nd child then instead of school. you can go to school anytime- you never know if you might suffer infertility. i completely regret to this day my decisions. hope you make the right decicion for you. good luck.

I know this is cold comfort but my daughter also suffers from secondary infertility. It may have made no difference if you would have tried to have a second sooner. She had her first child shortly after her 30th birthday and almost immediately started trying to have a second. She had no problems getting pregnant the first time but has had no luck getting pregnant a second time. Her daughter is now 4 1/2, my daughter and her husband have been seeing fertility doctors for 2 years to no avail. There is still time but the clock is ticking. I told her that a lot of people who have never been able to get pregnant would envy her and her beautiful though small family.