So we recently admitted a male patient who identifies himself as female. We don't get many patients like her. A nurse in particular let's his political views get in the way of work and has been calling this patient "it".
Now, let's fast forward to the dilemma. During medication pass, he addressed the patient as "it" out loud and other staff and patients started laughing; next thing you know, we had a behavioral emergency on our hands.
I filled out an incident report because several other nurses and I have spoken to this nurse prior to the event happening. One nurse even brought it up the chain of command. Not only is it unprofessional but it's endangering the safety of others - clearly, it's one of her triggers. Has anyone ever dealt with this type of conduct?
I was referring to an earlier post that said that. Not my personal opinion just me responding to an earlier post that stated name calling was why TG people kill themselves.
I think it was my post and I will expand. If I as a man called a woman the c word or as white called a black person the n word for no reason other than they were different from me then I would still not be as big of an ignorant ahole as the guy in this scenario.
The girl who ran in front of a truck was referred to as son by her mom and every religious therapist they saw.
Maybe send it to conversion camp to get rid of the sin. Maybe it just needs some meds to get normal and praise Jesus. Maybe we just make fun of it until it snaps.
I have had to learn first hand how to deal with a transgender child and was as ignorant as some on this thread sound about it. Its very personal and any parent ought to understand.
Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.
greenbeanio (love that username!) Only admins can delete posts, so something occurred behind the scenes that we (not even guides) know about. They have a deliberative process, sometimes I've seen users disappear and re-appear.
I'm really confused. I'm seeing a lot of good points here, and some seem contradictory.
I really think I need more education/experience with this, because what I thought I thought is maybe not what I think I may think.
Definitely this.
This is why I like to understand the viewpoints of others; it helps me to gain some insight on concepts I thought I fully understood. By the way, the patient was transferred to another unit due to "administrative reasons". I'm sure it's to separate the nurse from working with that patient any further. I just really hope this nurse learns from this experience.
I read in some earlier post that a TG person would be "devastated" if called it and that this is why TG people kill themselves. I believe that it is extremely telling if your joy and even your sanity hinges on an insult from some crackpot. If you know who you are and are happy with your choices, why the need for constant validation and co-signing from every person you come in contact with ? And yes nurses have an ethical obligation to not be jerks to their patients but it is a general attitude I see even with laypeople. You are a bully or bigot if you don't agree with and campaign for the cause/minority/victim d'jour.
You are leaving out the context around why TG folkses may take it very hard to be called an 'it'. We're talking about a life long condition, from the age where the child identifies with a gender until death. Being called 'it' once doesn't bother anyone, but having your entire identity be a PROBLEM from the age of 3, that one 'it' is a straw that can break the camel's back. Oh yeah, she was in the hospital too, so she wasn't doing very well AND she'd been taking smack and crap from people for YEARS.
It's one of those conditions (not a disease, but affliction is a great word) that doesn't start happening the moment we encounter the TG person. I think people forget that. What we opine about a person's TG status isn't worth the air to make the words. Their TG status has nothing whatsoever to do with us, our opinions, our religious ideologies or sociopolitical whatevers.
Looking at it this way pretty much makes the second half of your post sound judgmental and lacking in basic sympathy for another suffering human being.
People do that a lot. They leave out the context, and relate to the person through a thick self-centered veil of overly valued opinions and judgments. It's easy to make a straw man out of 'oh, boo hoo, he got called an 'it'" and then go off on those people wanting special treatment and constant validation. That was a pretty sucky thing to say
newboy, what did it say on her wristband? What was the name? I would go by that while checking meds. Oftentimes the patient will say call me "cheeseball".
For the posters saying it is a choice, what person would choose this? Being TG is NOT a choice.
Not only is gender one identifies with not a choice, it is not a mental illness nor delusion.
As nurses, isn't part of our ethical makeup as nurses to advocate for patients? Or is that just for the patients that we don't find personally and/or morally offensive?
It is a great wide world with all sorts of variables. A nurse's act of professional kindness and advocacy can go a long way in helping any patient to function.
It is also a big wide world of cruelty. That patients who don't fit into some sort of morality police mold have a really hard time navigating. As nurses, we need to be sure that we provide some sort of GPS for patients who may not fit the mold to be able to navigate safely and effectively.
What ya'll do and think and make yourself superior to in your own time, is your own business. Have at it then. But to practice subtle bigotry, cruelty, judgment on patients for nothing other than to take a piece of their souls is really a contraindication to being in the caring profession.
But to practice subtle bigotry, cruelty, judgment on patients for nothing other than to take a piece of their souls is really a contraindication to being in the caring profession.
Name calling, declaring transgender people to be mentally ill, delusional, having a constant need to be vaildated.....Nursing ignorance can be helped by education. Patients can be educated to the resources available to them. Why be snarky and cruel? No other reason than to tear down the esteem of a patient. That is sick stuff.
What one thinks on one's own time is one's own business. As an incredibly long time advocate for people who don't fit into one's idea of a perfect mold, it is disheartening to see nurses practicing in a manner that goes against a huge portion of ethical duty.
You know, I don't think you even really read my posts. Go back and read them, and try not to be blinded by your rage that you can't force everyone into your ideological mold. What I am doing in this discussion is thinking on my own time. You're accusing people of treating patients cruelly, who never have and would not, merely because they disagree with you about a couple aspects of this issue on a message board.
Go read what I said about how to treat these patients, and about protecting their dignity and honoring their basic humanity.
I think something can be a psychiatric issue without necessarily rising to the level of mental illness. This is, at the least, an extremely severe adjustment problem, and a damaging identity mismatch, with life-threatening sequelae. Mental health treatment should be part of the overall approach. When dealing with just the basic definitions of words, it is delusional to think one is the opposite gender from what they actually are. How to repair that mismatch is a topic that's anything but settled, at least among those of us honest enough to admit we don't know or understand enough about this phenomenon yet to make any blanket pronouncements that fit everyone.
And finally, it's not ignorance to have an opinion different from yours. Yours is not the only educated position.
I get where this is coming from but I fundamentally disagree. I don't think we, as nurses or as fellow human beings, get to decide what is "too much" for someone. I don't think we should pass judgement on someone when something we view as innocuous makes then break down. It's not our job or our right, because we haven't been there and we don't truly know what it's like to be them.
So, putting someone down for being hurt by something that's happened or that someone has done to them, or saying they "shouldn't be" hurt, to my eyes, is kind of like rubbing salt in their wound. Be compassionate that they are wounded in the first place; validate their pain and their right to feel it; be gentle and aware of the possibility for further harm. No need to judge them for what they are feeling.
I want to point out that saying TG people face psychiatric risks, and saying that TG is a psychiatric condition in and of itself are two wildly different things.
Of course TG individuals face psychiatric risks and tend to not be "well adjusted". TG people have to choose between suppressing themselves every minute of every day, or being true to themselves and facing violence and rejection every minute of every day. Kind of hard to be well adjusted under those circumstances. Where is their maladjustment really stemming from? I'd say from the experience of being TG in a society that does not accept them..... not from transgender identity being inherently "unbalanced" or anything.
It wasn't that long ago that homosexuality was considered a mental disorder. And not too long before that women were diagnosed with a whole range of bogus "hysteria" disorders. The common thread between these scenarios, and labeling TG as a psychological disorder, is a desire to separate ourselves from those who make us uncomfortable. Makes discriminating against them so much more palatable.
We had a trans patient on our unit once who was anatomically male but identified as female. One of our clinical techs handed the patient a urinal when they said they wanted to go to the bathroom and they freaked out. "*gasp* I am a female!" the patient said. Also she accidentally referred to the patient as "he" when talking to a family member in front of him, which made the patient mad as well. I find it hard to fault the clinical tech, however, even though she knew the patient was trans.
The patient looked male. They were black, had short, cropped hair, and wore a bandana over it, and "faked" an over the top style effeminate voice. Easy mistake; could have happened to anybody.
I think some people have their head so far up their err.. Other end, that they do not see how harmful their words can be for other people. To me, this point to a complete lack of respect and empathy. It doesn't matter one bit what you think the person should be referred as.
incognitoinKY
10 Posts
I think it was my post and I will expand. If I as a man called a woman the c word or as white called a black person the n word for no reason other than they were different from me then I would still not be as big of an ignorant ahole as the guy in this scenario.
The girl who ran in front of a truck was referred to as son by her mom and every religious therapist they saw.
Maybe send it to conversion camp to get rid of the sin. Maybe it just needs some meds to get normal and praise Jesus. Maybe we just make fun of it until it snaps.
I have had to learn first hand how to deal with a transgender child and was as ignorant as some on this thread sound about it. Its very personal and any parent ought to understand.