Bullying

Nurses General Nursing

Published

As I post this, yes, I'm aware true bullying does exist. 

Today, our clinic had 2 PCTs quit (call in and quit). Their claim when the exit team from HR called them? The nurses are bullies. They won't let me text, won't let me do my homework, won't let me go to my car and smoke, etc. Of course my clinic manager got a phone call from these HR morons who have no clue about the reality of what working directly in patient care requires. She told them that the nurses aren't bullies, and shouldn't even be considered as such, for just asking the techs to do their jobs. Right now, I'm so tired of the subject of bullying, I could scream. It makes it very hard for those who truly have been bullied to be taken seriously. Off my rant now...

I think there needs to be more research on bullying and lateral violence in the workplace. Nursing is different from say, IT, Design, etc. The latter fields are more collab and creative. Coming from that, nursing seems rigid, like being in the military, or banking. The cultures are different. So my empathetic, caring, analytical, positive, sensitive side worked great for nursing role and the patient. But the manipulative, subjugating, nonsupportive side of nursing culture was terrible for me. Completely opposing forces. I think the days of nursing being managed Major Houlihan style need to end. I don't do well under authoritarian management style. Too much passive aggression or microaggressions. Esp with the understaffing. 

2 Votes
Specializes in Geriatrics.

A lot of people don’t have life experience. 
I never did homework at work. Hence the term “home” work. 
Sadly this all started with big universities and their jobs- like working the front desk at the dorms. And doing homework at work was encouraged.

Some of these students don’t get the clue because they’ve never had to do anything in their life ever. Mommy and daddy have always picked up the slack.

1 Votes
22 minutes ago, vintagegal said:

A lot of people don’t have life experience. 
I never did homework at work. Hence the term “home” work. 
Sadly this all started with big universities and their jobs- like working the front desk at the dorms. And doing homework at work was encouraged.

Some of these students don’t get the clue because they’ve never had to do anything in their life ever. Mommy and daddy have always picked up the slack.

Many students are second career. Given the current changes in our society that have been evolving quickly over the last 3-4 decades, I personally think the millenials are an asset and can possibly fix many problems. The current state of nursing with nurses quitting left and right is evidence enough that working conditions and management are a big part of the problem. If nurses are rejecting working conditions then it's time for the workplace to evolve to the needs of present and future generations. I don't know who's mommy or daddy have time to pick up their slack. Most homes have mom and dad working. I think they're doing the best they can. I never did homework at work. Had no time in hosp. but I would if I could. 

Specializes in Dialysis.
1 hour ago, AtomicNurse said:

I don't know who's mommy or daddy have time to pick up their slack

When I was still a clinic manager, I would get occasional calls from a mom or dad about how their angel was being mistreated by being asked to do their job. I would simply tell them that "angel" was an adult, and I could not discuss angel's employment with them, but angel could come discuss with me-it was usually the same 3 or 4 techs that were more interested in socializing on their phones than working. Angel would never come because they knew that those they were complaining about them had very specific, hard evidence. My current clinic manager says she gets those calls every once in a while and says the same thing as I did. It happens more often than you think, d/t the participation trophy mentality and everyone is special syndrome

4 Votes
Specializes in Putting out fires.
On 10/5/2021 at 12:39 PM, LibraNurse27 said:

I've seen coworkers like this, and because I'm bad with confrontation I did the stupid thing of picking up the slack when they didn't respond to my requests to do their jobs. Others were more assertive or reported them, but people rarely got fired because of short staffing and inability to hire more staff. It's a bad situation.

A few times I saw people get fired, because of so many complaints to management and the union, and maybe the hospital got tired of paying people to text/FaceTime/do homework. I don't think we need to generalize that it's always young people though. Maybe the millennial generation as a whole tends to be more entitled, want praise for nothing, etc, but not all of us. I know I work hard as a nurse, and care a LOT, to the point that I've had suicidal thoughts after making mistakes. That's why the generalizations bother me so much, because after all I've been through as a nurse it's invalidating for people to assume I'm lazy and don't care based on my age.

I find it irritating how passive aggressive some co-workers are when they get mad and when it is attempted to be addressed at the time, and they say “it’s fine” and will not talk about it. I can understand they may be upset, and need a moment. But this running to supervisor or management is ridiculous! I have had this happen to me. I have been accused of not being a team player and hiding. I am a team player, I will help you, but I am not going to do someone else’s job. I do not hide. My co-workers are so loud, I have had to ask them to be more quiet so I can hear when a doctor is giving me orders. But they keep talking. Grr! So I go to a quieter place. When my manager told me that I hide and am not a team player she would not give me examples of this and said it was not her job!!! She said “everyone” was saying when I asked who said those things. I knew this was a lie! There are a handful of people who are cliquish and gossip about everyone and are friends with the immediate nursing supervisor. Walking by her office is a tell tale sign of the “pot stirrers”, who run at every turn.

4 Votes
On 10/8/2021 at 1:28 PM, Hoosier_RN said:

I would simply tell them that "angel" was an adult, and I could not discuss angel's employment with them, but angel could come discuss with me

I wouldn't have the patience. I'd probably tell them that maybe if they'd done a better job of rasing them, having no work ethic wouldn't be an issue.

My mom raised us with the philosophy that it wasn't her job to raise us to be happy adults it was her responsibility to raise us to be good humans. She didn't do a lot of things right but I think this was one area she was spot on.

2 Votes
Specializes in Student Nurse.
10 hours ago, GGLynnRN said:

There are a handful of people who are cliquish and gossip about everyone and are friends with the immediate nursing supervisor. Walking by her office is a tell tale sign of the “pot stirrers”, who run at every turn.

This comment was difficult for me. I’ve experienced this in the military. Someone or a small group riles up management against you & you don’t even know you are in a viper’s den. It somewhat shattered me for years later. However, I try to remember a saying I heard long after that period was over. “You know you’re leading & out in front, when you have a few daggers in your butt”! 
I still don’t genuinely know what riled up two separate campaigns against me, I genuinely just did my job. 

3 Votes
Specializes in Acute care medicine.

That's why the generalizations bother me so much, because after all I've been through as a nurse it'sinvalidating for people to assume I'm lazy anddon't care based on my age.
 

Generalizations are generally a bad idea. There are so many young who are excellent and work very hard.  The generalization that the old eat their young is, too, a hurtful one. I am not a bully, and my asking someone else to do their job is not me eating my young. I will not pussyfoot around to ask you to take care of your patients; I’m busy and don’t have time for that. You are getting paid to work, so work. Those (of all ages) who spend so much time on their phones or talking at the desk have a different work ethic than those actually at the bedside. This is not an age issue as much as it is a work ethic issue and a respect issue. 

5 Votes

RE: ageism or generationalism whatever we can call it. Time goes on and change happens as society grows. It's immiment. The way things were done do not necessarily work well now. This goes for management too. Crusty old bully bats need to go. Get some high emotional and social IQ management in there with education in education/management and nursing. But first we have the whole nurse staffing and corp BS  problem to address because this is where is all starts. greed. Bully bats are current managment tool to keep nurses in line like in the military. 

Specializes in Acute care medicine.

I totally agree. Management intimidates the newer, inexperienced nurses into towing the line, telling them they cannot clock no lunch or meal break interrupted when that is the case, because they should have taken one. 

We do have the corporate BS and staffing problems to navigate first. 

2 Votes
Specializes in NICU, PICU, Transport, L&D, Hospice.
On 10/6/2021 at 5:20 AM, Hoosier_RN said:

We get the 2nd reaction. As far as hiring motivated techs...anymore, we're lucky if any applicants respond to a interview request, much less show up to job shadow. So I get the need to hang on to employees, but I'm sick and tired of, as a nurse, being held accountable for their actions

Nursing assistants function under the direction of a nurse.  When they are caring for patients under your supervision, wouldn't you rightly be accountable for the care of the nursing assistant? They do what you tell them to do or what is in the nursing poc. Right?

Specializes in Dialysis.
1 hour ago, toomuchbaloney said:

Nursing assistants function under the direction of a nurse.  When they are caring for patients under your supervision, wouldn't you rightly be accountable for the care of the nursing assistant? They do what you tell them to do or what is in the nursing poc. Right?

Some yes, some no. In dialysis, while they function under my license for direct patient care, I'm not signed off for all thst some of them do, like mixing acid or bicarbonate. This makes it a totally different kind of animal in that respect. But I guess I should have been more clear and said I'm tired of being held accountable for things being done or not being done according to p&p, and having no authority to correct it

3 Votes
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