MsNickki

Mid-40’s nurse graduate. Graduated in 2021. My 1st job was short lived and in a different city. The cliques were insane. These cliques were along language & ethnic lines. I just assume there will be cliques at every job I work. I don’t speak Tagalog, but know enough to know they were speaking about myself & another nurse right in front of us. Then would turn smile and try to ask us personal questions. Blatantly in your face or coyly behind your back if someone talks about me…it’s going to be a very short conversation bc they don’t know anything. I know feeling a part of the out group is not fun at all. However it does give you an opportunity to focus on your craft. Try to focus on strengthening the connections you have in and out of work and doing things that make you feel more fulfilled.

I also became a nurse in my 40’s. My circumstances were very different as I only had to juggle 2 kids & nursing school. The finances were taken care of. However, I would tell anyone who has a for nursing to go for it. It’s funny you say “airline pilots don’t eat their young” because they really don’t. However the first time I heard that saying was in my initial career…aircraft mechanic! This is a white male dominated career. I have no idea why that was the case, but I always say it’s a choice. I was able to train people w/o killing their souls/self esteem. However, that was not my experience when I started at 18 years old & worked the flight line into my mid-30’s. I loved hands on but I loved training even more. I loved that people “got it” & enjoyed training with me and even volunteered to work nights to work with me. I hold on to that, I know my temperament & I believe I will be apart of a great team. I graduated in December, passed NCLEX, but since don’t actually need the income immediately I’m very selective in the job I choose.

Have you heard of Dr. Z? He has a podcast called “The NCLEX high yield podcast.” He also has free Zoom reviews. Last week he released a podcast interviewing an RN who took more than 20 years to pass NCLEX. One of my preceptors didn’t take the NCLEX for 10 years. Listening to Mark Klimek, he basically said, you should invest in a review, including new grads. When you sit for the NCLEX you want to consider that you have done all you could to get ready for the test.

This comment was difficult for me. I’ve experienced this in the military. Someone or a small group riles up management against you & you don’t even know you are in a viper’s den. It somewhat shattered me for years later. However, I try to remember a saying I heard long after that period was over. “You know you’re leading & out in front, when you have a few daggers in your butt”! I still don’t genuinely know what riled up two separate campaigns against me, I genuinely just did my job.

Perhaps every cohort has that overly competitive person. We are less than 20 people & split in half for clinical so I really haven't had to deal with it. However, I had an odd experience in A&P 2. Completely my fault, but every other week, I had to leave class 15-20 minutes early. My new "lab partner" told me sure...I'll send you all the notes! I hadn't needed any help until maybe week 7 or 8. I noticed she got to class at the last second or late so I never had a chance to ask for help. Keep in mind, she texted me for information as she skipped lab often & I lived for lab. One day I was running late to class (talking as usual) & I noticed out of the corner of my eye...this girl sitting in the corner almost "hiding”/cowering outside in an alcove. She was staring at me, that's the only reason I noticed her. So I realized this young lady actively avoided me & showed up to class late so I couldn't ask for her help. Wow! So typically once she walked into class I was taking pics of someone else's notes. I also took a note from my A&P 1 lab partner & blocked the girl's number. So now that I think about it...my nursing cohort is awesome! I love them all.

Interesting. I didn’t understand how anyone could cheat at my college & I understand now why most exams in prerequisites were 40% essay. Also there were A&B exams, hand written answers & you never got them back. Some profs returned the essay portion, but that was rare. I had an experience that had me sweating bullets…as we are sitting for a final my “lab partner” coughs a few times. I look at her & realize she has something written up & down her arm. I didn’t understand how that could possibly be of any assistance. There was multiple choice, matching, essay & ordering on the final. We weren’t exactly buddies by that time, I didn’t say anything…I certainly finished in a hurry (I did well). I’ve never seen her since. I always tried to help her initially, when she missed class I sent her the notes before class was finished. When I missed a class…she blocked my number from texting her to ask for notes. That ended my one sided attempt at friendship. I guess it’s funny now & I’m probably weird cause I just took it in stride, but this young lady & a competitive one completely baffled me!

Nursing Student, 2nd career, older student with kids under 6. Obviously, I can’t give you advice as an experienced nurse. I can say I have concerns regarding my education & what goes on in at least one local hospital where I had clinical. Because of that, I’m either moving or holding out post graduation for a nurse graduate position. Most programs are 12-15 months. On the kid part, we’ve got to let each other live as we see fit & hold the judgement.