Best Friend Getting Married

RNNPICU, BSN, RN · Nov 20, 2015

What I learned when I graduated and began working as a nurse, is that nobody really cares about grades. Yes some new grad residency programs might have a minimum gpa but most only care if you have your license or not.
You are probably not going to remember the majority of what you learn in anatomy class within 2-3 years.
I am speaking as someone who just got married this August and it kinda hurt my feelings when some people didn't come that I wishes could have celebrated my special day with me. 30 years from now your friend will still remember exactly who was with her on that special day. Hopefully a once in a lifetime day.
Just offering one more opinion as a nurse and a newlywed. There's more to life than school. Even though it doesn't always feel like it in nursing school! Just saying - think about what will matter 30 years from now, not just a month from now.
Best wishes.

Although true regarding grades. The OP needs to get to the NCLEX first, she has to graduate from nursing school to make this all happen

rollieschmollie · Nov 20, 2015

From what I understand this is an A&P lab you'd be missing, correct? So a prerequisite class. That I would miss lab to attend the wedding. If it were an actual nursing course lab in nursing school, then no I would not skip the lab.

Honey Clover · Nov 20, 2015

I suppose it's different for everyone. I was just speaking from my perspective. My friends have pulled me out of many holes and troubles throughout my life, I put them as my priority when I need to because I know they will do the same for me. Success was never about succeeding in school for me. It used to be (and I was quite unhappy and lonely during that time) but I've learned now that what makes me truly happy is the loving relationships I have with other people in my life and building meaningful experiences with them. Since I'm the type to look at things long term, on my deathbed, I know I'd be thinking about my loved ones throughout my life, not my degree, grades or even my job. I am also working at a long term care facility with lots of seniors and all they think about is when their families and friends will visit them so this is a good lesson for me too. That's why I said, if it was me, I'd do my best to attend my best friends wedding, even if my it may put a small dent in my grades. I would be confident enough to catch up on the study material and pull through to make things work out in the end. But it's true, everyone has different priorities. OP asked for different opinions so we gave them but it seems OP has already made up her mind about the whole situation. The important thing here is that if OP values the friendship but still does not want to miss lab, then simply communicate it to the friend and make it up to her in some other way.

kbrn2002, ADN, RN · Nov 20, 2015

Have you talked to your instructor about this? If the teacher is willing to let you skip the lab for this wedding by all means go to the wedding. I understand there is also an issue with work due that day. Is there some weird time requirement that won't allow you to still turn in your assignments due on that day? If they are paper assignments, just have them done by the due date and drop them off with the instructor that morning before the wedding. If they are computer assignments just submit them online, you don't have to physically be in school to do that.

direw0lf, BSN · Nov 21, 2015

I agree with Heather. I think back to how hard I worked in classes for perfect grades and attendances and um well for prerequisites and gen eds it really didn't matter to be that perfect! But..if she can change the day with no biggie then that's even better!

direw0lf, BSN · Nov 21, 2015

One tip I have. I push my butt to work very hard beginning day 1 of the semester. I get ahead on my assignments and I get the grades I want. This..is..such..a..relief ...when a real life event comes up or just to be able to relax at the end, while everyone else is stressed about projects and finals I'm calm and set and can afford to get a lower grade on a final and still have the grade I want overall. I don't know any of my classmates who do this. But it is so worth it!

Just for future reference!!!

But yeah I would skip a prereq or gen ed class for my best friend's wedding.* Your choice though do what you feel is right just remember that these classes are really not going to seem that important by next year but your friend will.

*unless doing so will definately jeopardize your acceptance into the nursing program.

UnicornMagic · Nov 21, 2015

Personally, I would have done my best to work and study ahead of time so I can attend my best friend's wedding.

Her friend just announced she was getting married. She gave her no time to prepare.

Go to class. You need every point you can get.

This isn't a fancy wedding that she planned for a year and made reservations etc. It sounds like a court house wedding. If that is the case, it takes all of 20 minutes. Lab is only around 2 hours out of the day. She could easily wait until a little later in the day, or do it before your class if she really wanted you there.

Horseshoe, BSN, RN · Nov 21, 2015

I graduated nursing school with a 4.0. Nothing came between me and my grades.

And I regret it tremendously. Things suffered in my life that didn't need to.

Unless missing this lab is REALLY going to hurt you academically, I would go to the wedding. Maybe your teacher would even cut you some slack, knowing the details.

tbird88 · Nov 24, 2015

Thank you everybody for your comments and support. I spoke with my professor and she was willing to let me go to another lab class and turn my assignments in late. She said that would not affect my perfect attendance. Yeah! I guess I just needed to ask first. lol

tbird88 · Nov 25, 2015

Hi Horseshoe,

Wow I am sorry to hear that. I hope life is better for you.

Horseshoe, BSN, RN · Nov 25, 2015

Hi Horseshoe,
Wow I am sorry to hear that. I hope life is better for you.

Life is great! That was a long time ago. Due to my perfectionism, my relationships suffered. I got so stressed out that my thick, healthy hair began to fall out in handfuls. I lost weight and could barely keep food down at times. I suffered incredible "mommy guilt." All to maintain a "perfect" GPA. It really wasn't necessary. I could have still done very well without driving myself crazy.

So the point is that while school is important, relationships are more important. Choose people and experiences over perfection.

I'm glad you get to be there for your friend. THAT is a memory worth keeping. Any given class is not.

Good luck in your studies. :)