Best Friend Getting Married

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Hi Everybody,

Well my best friend is getting married and she wants me to be a witness. I want to be at her wedding but I have lab that day and to get extra credit for perfect attendance I need to go to lab. Do you think I should sacrifice my perfect attendance for her special day? I am doing just okay in the class and I think we can only miss 2 labs. But then I have to play catch up. I want to go to her wedding but I don't want to miss lab. What would you do?

I am working way to hard in Anatomy and Physiology I to jeopardize my grade by trying to turn my assignments in early because she does not accept late assignments. I love my friend but I don't think I will be able to make it. I am trying to be reasonable about this. If my Professor will accept my assignments December 1st and let me makeup work then maybe I'll consider it. But I will still miss out on the perfect attendance extra credit. I don't want to tell my friend I can't make it. I am sorry to rant on about this but I hope it doesn't affect our friendship if I don't go.

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I thought about doing work early but it is way too much for me to have done by Nov 24th before Thanksgiving break and I have a exam and a quiz, Monday Nov 23rd. I am putting way to much pressure on myself and I need to study for exam.

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Personally, I would have done my best to work and study ahead of time so I can attend my best friend's wedding. If it was me, I'd miss lab and explain things to my professor. Seeing your responses to people urging you to attend the event, seems like you don't really want to go though because of school. It's up to you but if you decide not to go, be sure to explain that to your friend and see what she has to say about it. Or make it up to her in some other way. True friends are for life; school is only temporary.

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Specializes in Nursing Professional Development.

If it were really important to her that you be there, she would schedule it at a time you could attend. Show her that you care in other ways. Apparently, this is not a big wedding with a timetable that is strictly dictated by facility availability.

There are lots of other ways to show her that you care. Don't risk your acceptance into the nursing school of your choice for it. Don't be a doormat.

If she really cares about YOU, she will understand -- and not expect you to put your studies and future opportunities at risk.

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I'd go to her wedding. You don't want to regret it later:sorry: You can makeup school. You can't make up her special day.

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Specializes in Psychiatric nursing; Medical-Surgrical.
Thank you Heathermaizey, you have made some thought provoking comments and I need to really consider my decision carefully. This is a very important day for her and I do not want to disappoint her. But she is in college too, so she knows how important my class is too. I guess I have to decide what is most important. Dang I hate this!

I don't think you really want to go lol

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Specializes in Allergy/ENT, Occ Health, LTC/Skilled.

I would go to lab, miss the wedding, and buy the married a couple a nice meal to make up for it. If she is your best friend, she should understand you do not want to miss, it you have too. I didn't go to my sister's wedding because it was 6 hours away and I was in my first semester of pre-reqs. We not close though but I still don't regret it. School, besides my mortgage, is the biggest invesment I will ever make, so for me the only thing that comes before that are my husband and children. I take a no excuses approach to not missing classes or assignments. It's a hard core approach but I have always been an all or nothing kind of person so I have to stay in the game constantly or I will loose my focus.

Good luck!

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Specializes in Allergy/ENT, Occ Health, LTC/Skilled.
Personally, I would have done my best to work and study ahead of time so I can attend my best friend's wedding. If it was me, I'd miss lab and explain things to my professor. Seeing your responses to people urging you to attend the event, seems like you don't really want to go though because of school. It's up to you but if you decide not to go, be sure to explain that to your friend and see what she has to say about it. Or make it up to her in some other way. True friends are for life; school is only temporary.

I think of this in a opposite way.How well I do is for life. If I fail, I still have those student loans to pay even if I never make it to NCLEX. To me, friendships have nearly alaways been situational, meaningful, but not for life.

That said, I can understand how friends are like family for many. I moved many times a child, married and had kids quite young, so having close friends has never been my thing. I count my husband as my best friend and my dog as the other lol.

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Go to class! She will understand (or she should). When I was in Chem, my husband was injured with what we thought was a broken leg. I met him at the ER and then left him there waiting so I could to go to class. Really wanted those perfect attendance points :) After I got out of class and hour and a half later, he was still waiting to be seen :D sometimes ya gotta do what ya gotta do! BTW it was a torn ACL...

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Specializes in ICU.

I just get the feeling you don't want to go. That's fine if you don't, just don't expect your friendship to be the same. I think I have a different definition of friendship on here. I have never had an unreasonable professor when it came to life events. Never. I missed nursing fundamental lab for my sisters wedding. My instructor understood and let me get my work done ahead of time.

Its an A&P lab class. Your life should not revolve around school at this point.

I would be hurt if my best friend missed my wedding. It may just be a justice of the peace but she asked you to witness. It's obviously a very intimate gathering which to me makes it more special. Just realize you are risking a good friendship to identify body parts or histology slides. Is it that more important?

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Specializes in Public Health, Maternal Child Health.

What I learned when I graduated and began working as a nurse, is that nobody really cares about grades. Yes some new grad residency programs might have a minimum gpa but most only care if you have your license or not.

You are probably not going to remember the majority of what you learn in anatomy class within 2-3 years.

I am speaking as someone who just got married this August and it kinda hurt my feelings when some people didn't come that I wishes could have celebrated my special day with me. 30 years from now your friend will still remember exactly who was with her on that special day. Hopefully a once in a lifetime day.

Just offering one more opinion as a nurse and a newlywed. There's more to life than school. Even though it doesn't always feel like it in nursing school! Just saying - think about what will matter 30 years from now, not just a month from now.

Best wishes.

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Specializes in PICU.

Go to class. If your friend truly wanted you to be a witness she would have asked you ahead of time, asking if you were available on X number of days. 11 days notice is really short notice, especially for someone in school. makes me wonder if someone backed out or had a change of plans and she is looking for a witness. Even for justice of peace, people typically plan ahead.

Talk to her and explain that although you would be honored to be a witness, the time she has coincides with an important lab and that you need to turn in assignments. Explain that late assignments are unacceptable.

Offer to do something special for them.

I see many posters giving advice on skipping the lab and turning in assignments late. Just remember this is nursing school many things are unforgiving (right or wrong) It can set the tone for the rest of your time in school and may come back to haunt you later.

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