Best end of year complaint

[kidzcare]

I know we've had these threads before... but we are getting as restless as the kiddos and we need a laugh.

Share your best "Are you freaking kidding me, Kid?!?!" complaint (from anytime, I just notice they become more off the wall the closer we are to summer or another break)... and let's all remember that another adult (teacher) had to clear these kids to come see us first...)

My two best ones came from the same fifth grade student a couple days apart.

Student: My earlobes feel squishy

Me: ...ok. Did you hurt them in some way?

Student: Nope. Just feel squishy

Me: That's not really an issue. Head back to class.

Student: It feels like all my bones are turning to mush.

Me: Well, you walked in here ok, so I thing they'll be ok.

Student: *(giant eye roll)*

[scuba nurse, BSN, MSN, RN]

From a 6 th grader today: "Can I just go home, I am already done with today" (totally not sick, just wants to not be here!)

My answer: "Yeah, join the club!!"

[bsyrn, ASN, RN]

High schooler came in stating " I am angry and my Mom says you need to send me home." Nope, just nope. Off to the office she went!

[mc3, ASN, RN]

My legs are wobbly after jump rope..

[NurseBeans, BSN, MSN, RN]

From a 6 th grader today: "Can I just go home, I am already done with today" (totally not sick, just wants to not be here!)

My answer: "Yeah, join the club!!"

I am guilty of having this exchange about once a day:

"I just wanna go home, call my mom"

"me too, do you think my mom will come get me?

[tamarae1]

I totally said exactly that the other day at dismissal. Was standing with one of the first grade classes. :)

[kidzcare]

I totally said exactly that the other day at dismissal. Was standing with one of the first grade classes. :)

Which one?

[Nurse in MT]

Bug bite on the elbow: "It's making me dizzy and light headed." Really?? I responded that it didn't bite him on the brain, go back to class.

[WyVy, LPN]

Kinderbug: I have something in my ear.

Me: what is it?

Kinderbug: paper.

Me: how did it get there?!

Kinderbug: I was rolling it into a ball and playing with it and it just... *pointed at ear*

Grabbed penlight, sure enough, it was pretty far in there. Curved hemostat saved the day!

Almost done y'all!

[moreoreo]

Sweetest frequent flyer ever pointed at two freckles on her arm and called them bug bites. "They started hurting while I was outside."

And I am seeing a LOT of old scabs/bruises that "happened today during recess."

[JenTheSchoolRN, BSN, RN]

I am guilty of having this exchange about once a day:

"I just wanna go home, call my mom"

"me too, do you think my mom will come get me?

Ha, mine exchange usually goes like this:

"I want to go home."

"Well, I want a million dollars, but unfortunately I think neither of us will get what we want today."

(Sometimes I'll add "But we'll get what we need." One high school got that and laughed once.)

[NurseBeans, BSN, MSN, RN]

Just had a 1st grader come in with a huge hickey she did herself...on her upper arm! I told her I was amazed she did that herself but she says she did. No reason given to me, just felt like she'd try it out. She was teary and embarrassed and wanted to lay down in my office but I told her no way. She looked pretty horrified when I explained that it would be there for a few days at least!

And of course she is wearing a sleeveless dress.

[tamarae1]

I am guilty of having this exchange about once a day:

"I just wanna go home, call my mom"

"me too, do you think my mom will come get me?

This one! Was at dismissal with first grade one day waiting on a parent. Teacher was about to start calling parents of those left standing. I asked if she'd call my mom and have her come pick me up too. One of the kids piped up that I drive that car over there and can just go home. Oh! Yeah! Byeeee! I told them I was tired and I'd still rather have my mom come pick me up. They thought it was pretty funny.