Baby vs no baby... help!

nivalr · Sep 18, 2017

Why would your bills be higher? Once you graduate and are placed your insurance should be top notch. Either way, school is a full time job and just my A&P course required 15 hours of study per week at least. I can't imagine having my concentration broken by the attention required of a newborn.

**emergenceRN17, ASN, BSN, RN** · Sep 18, 2017

Hi,

I do not have children but I have just graduated from nursing school. I believe that each require kinds of dedicated time. You might not want to go through school pregnant. You never know what unexpected things could come up during pregnancy. Have you thought about possibly trying closer to the end of schooling? Either way, I wish you the best of luck!!

Ddestiny, BSN, RN · Sep 18, 2017

Nursing school is very time-consuming and intense. Then, some people mistakenly assume that the end of the program means the beginning of "the easy part" but that is not the case. The first year of actual nursing practice is, for many people, even more stressful because it there is so much that nursing school does NOT teach you, and now you're the one responsible for patient care. In my LPN program, we started off with 17 and lost two people around Spring Break, in a program that graduated in May. So close, but those particular students could not overcome the stress of school, home life, and young kids at the same time. On the other hand, in my RN program I had classmates that were pregnant and chose that specific program because the clinicals were very flexible (many programs are not).

I remember being told before my LPN program that, "if it's going to happen, it's going to happen during nursing school". Meaning, stressful things happen at the most inconvenient timing. For me I feel like I was lucky with ONLY getting some marital stress that was eventually worked through, while others literally had divorces, deaths in immediate family, extended child illnesses.... just awful. I was reminded of this a few weeks ago when I had a patient with an extremely debilitating stroke, who had a daughter in an LPN to RN program. She lost almost a week of time at school to be at the hospital, and was trying to figure out how to take some time off from the program as her mother entered hospice.

Bottom line: Whatever you choose, go into it understanding that you cannot predict everything. If you get pregnant while in school or have your child right before school, there could be intense complications that really set you back. Some people are better at handling stress, lack of sleep, etc and still being able to retain new information that others. You didn't give us any indication for why you're interested in having a child right before school other than the cost, so unless there's advanced age, a degenerative fertility issue, etc then do consider that after you get your job as an RN then you're going to not only be more financially stable, but you could potentially also have even better insurance depending upon where you end up.

Good luck with your decision.

LPN1118 · Sep 19, 2017

not every pregnancy goes smooth. There's always a chance that complications can occur and you can be on bed rest. You need to dedicate a lot of time to focusing and studying and having a newborn would put a damper on that. I say wait until you're done with school

BAY AREA RN, BSN · Sep 19, 2017

only you can make the decision of what you want to do. When you become a nurse and get that decent wage plus benefits from your nursing career you want have to worry about the amount of insurance because you will be able to afford it. you can always have a baby but you want always be able to be accepted into a nursing program. They are really challenging without kids. My kid is 5 and its a challenge giving him the attention that he needs because i have to work and study. get through school it will be worth it. Seems like your doing things in the right order, boyfriend, home career, hopefully marriage and then baby.

babeinboots, MSN, NP, CNM · Sep 25, 2017

I got pregnant 2 weeks after completely my BSN and couldn't imagine being pregnant and having a baby while in nursing school! It would have killed me! But I know people who have done it, God bless them, lol. I would suggest waiting on the baby but that's just my personal opinion. Some people would also advise you to work a year before having a bay too. There will always be something and there is never a "perfect time" to have a baby. I'm glad I had my daughter when I did and wouldn't change it for the world, do what works best for you and your family!

And to the person saying a boyfriend isn't a husband and all that crap: FYI husbands can be **** dads too and last time I checked, being married doesn't stop a man from walking out that door or cheating if he wants too! Times have changed and there are plenty of reasons why couples wait or decide not to get married that have nothing to do with fear of commitment. Good luck OP!

babeinboots, MSN, NP, CNM · Sep 25, 2017

only you can make the decision of what you want to do. When you become a nurse and get that decent wage plus benefits from your nursing career you want have to worry about the amount of insurance because you will be able to afford it. you can always have a baby but you want always be able to be accepted into a nursing program. They are really challenging without kids. My kid is 5 and its a challenge giving him the attention that he needs because i have to work and study. get through school it will be worth it. Seems like your doing things in the right order, boyfriend, home career, hopefully marriage and then baby.

Definitely not true. The window for a woman to have a baby is way smaller than the window of time that she can get accepted into nursing school. Getting pregnant can be difficult for a young healthy woman but throw in health issues, stress, and AMA and it gets 10 times more difficult.

Tenebrae, BSN, RN · Sep 25, 2017

If you and your partner dont know, why would a bunch of anonymous strangers on an internet message board know what is best in your situation?

BAY AREA RN, BSN · Sep 25, 2017

Definitely not true. The window for a woman to have a baby is way smaller than the window of time that she can get accepted into nursing school. Getting pregnant can be difficult for a young healthy woman but throw in health issues, stress, and AMA and it gets 10 times more difficult.

my comment is based off of her saying that she will be starting her program in a year, and it will be 3 semesters and she will be an RN. thats 2 and 1/2 years tops. So i gave my opinion that she should go to school and do the baby in 2 and 1/2 years. hopefully a lot shouldn't change in her fertility between now and then, but I don't know her age.

Saraghawas · Sep 25, 2017

Definitely wait

Chay74 · Sep 25, 2017

I would also wait until you have finished school. It is one thing to have an 8 year old than to have a newborn. Newborns require more care than 8 year olds. Also, during that Post-Partum time, you may not want to go back to nursing but stay with your baby. I am lucky in that my two daughters are 13 and 10, old enough to fend for themselves so to speak. If you were my daughter, I would suggest that you wait until you finish school. That way you have your own money to buy things YOU want for the baby rather than wait on the generosity of others. You will also have total control where your little one goes to daycare without having to rely upon grandparents as caretakers. I also tell my daughters to make sure that they can take care of themselves independently instead of having to rely on others. That way in case things go south, they will be fine. I can only hope that they listen.

Al Kalosis · Sep 27, 2017

If you're like most people - full of unwarranted hubris - then by all means, force another poor soul to be a part of this doomed, miserable, violent species.

However, if you have an ethical bone in your body, wait until you're ready and seriously consider adoption.