I am transgendered, and though I have chosen to live my life as the sex I was born (male) as, an argument I had with my aunt tonight has me wondering about some things. She does not think that I should consider getting into the nursing field because the job would "be too intimate and personal" and "I know I wouldn't want a transgendered person taking care of me". I tried to tell her that one's sexual orientation or identified gender have NO BEARING WHATSOEVER on how good a nurse that person may or may not be.
I do agree that a person that obviously looks like a male but is wearing makeup, or that is "flaming", is going to cause some problems with some patients, but in general, no one has "I am really a male" on their name tag. Keeping in mind that I knew nothing about transgenderism back in 1997, I was a CNA back then and when I mentioned that to her she said "well, I didn't think it was an appropriate job for you back then". Grrrr......
What have your experiences been with this sort of thing? Have you noticed transgendered healthcare staff being treated differently be co-workers, management, patients or their family? Has being transgendered caused issues in getting hired? Have you ever had to deal with family that were generally negative about anything you ever said or did?
Tackling the "not liked" issue- There will be patients that will not want a nurse because they are male, period. Or they will not want a black/white/chinese/indian nurse. or a young nurse. or one with an accent. You can make people both shut their mouth and reexamine their own predjudices- by acting professionally and kind, no matter how stupid they are. And that is addressing the issue of an obviously transgendered nurse. Otherwise; let the haters keep hating. Kill 'em with kindness.
How do people react to you (as a transgendered male) at your current place of employment? How about when you're out and about? Well- - -that's probably the reaction you'll get in a health care setting too.
I remember the first time I saw a transgendered male several year back at the M.A.C. counter in Macy's. I wanted to stare but ONLY out of curiosity (Plus his make up was FLAWLESS-- :)).
Anyway, the real issue for you is not about being liked (at some point we are all judged or disliked for one reason or another) but HOW you will handle situations WHEN you are confronted with patients/peers/family/etc. who are uneasy with your lifestyle.
As unfortunate as it may be, I think you'll get the stares, snickers, and out right rude comments from folks; but it shouldn't stop you from pursuing your aspirations of becoming a nurse.
Perhaps you can contact some local GLBT organizations and find out what resources they may have on workplace issues. Try here first: http://glbtworkplace.com/
Specializes in M/S,Tele,HIV/AIDS,Research,IV Therapy.
I am a gay male nurse living in Ft Lauderdale. I have personally known and worked with two excellent Nurses who happend to be transgender. Both of whom were fantastic RN's. One was a male but living as a female before the surgery. During the time she was at the hospital she went from male to female. A few people were whispering behind her back, but those were the ignorant people. They probably whispered about me behind my back as well. Patients never had a problem during the interim and especially not after the surgery.
The second RN who happens to be transgender from male to female, has gone as far as to get her MSN and teach at the University of Miami School of Nursing and is loved there. She will be getting her ARNP soon and going to work in L&D.
The sex you are should NEVER be an issue with patients. What about the female patients I have seen (and I've seen a lot) Do they make an issue of it? It's extremely rare. I think you should hold your head up high and be proud of who you are. People who refuse to learn or try to understand are really not worth your time or energy. I for one am proud of you for doing what you've known was right from birth.:redbeathe
I am a gay male nurse living in Ft Lauderdale. I have personally known and worked with two excellent Nurses who happend to be transgender. Both of whom were fantastic RN's. One was a male but living as a female before the surgery. During the time she was at the hospital she went from male to female. A few people were whispering behind her back, but those were the ignorant people. They probably whispered about me behind my back as well. Patients never had a problem during the interim and especially not after the surgery.
The second RN who happens to be transgender from male to female, has gone as far as to get her MSN and teach at the University of Miami School of Nursing and is loved there. She will be getting her ARNP soon and going to work in L&D.
The sex you are should NEVER be an issue with patients. What about the female patients I have seen (and I've seen a lot) Do they make an issue of it? It's extremely rare. I think you should hold your head up high and be proud of who you are. People who refuse to learn or try to understand are really not worth your time or energy. I for one am proud of you for doing what you've known was right from birth.:redbeathe
Matthew
Hi Matthew, I agree with everything you said in principal. However I notice you are in Fort Lauderdale. I have had a lot of gay friends from this area migrate to Ft. Lauderdale because of the social environment there. We don't know where the OP is from. If OP is from Chattanooga TN he might be grudgingly accepted by most coworkers and if he is not blatant, by most patients. Many Coworkers make wisecracks about even the best gay male nurses and I have no idea what they say about the females. They are careful about what they say to your face. We don't have any TG coworkers to my knowledge.
My understanding is health care is quiet liberal compared to other professions in their acceptance of sexuality. There are miles of difference between the acceptance levels in Chattanooga than in Fort Lauderdale and I bet there is far more predjudice in other areas of the country.
I believe that both my friends who died way too young had to do with their inability to negotiate their self expression in their lives and cultures. The two who are still living have negotiated more to varying degrees. Unfortunately there are still lots of Broke Back Mountains in the US.
It makes me hopeful when I hear stories like yours. :flowersfo I hope to see the day when that could take place in Chattanooga or Billings.
a few years ago my mom was hospitalized and her nurse was transgendered (at least thats what we thought she was).....at any rate she was an extremely good nurse and we didn't care....I must admit however when we 1st saw her our eyebrows raised and we had a couple conversations about her (mostly trying to figure it out)...but we weren't rude and our main concern was that she delivered the best care she could...which is what she did...good luck to you
I have worked with a transgender nurse. I live in a very conservative city, so you can imagine the comments that were made about her. As far as I know she didn't receive any complaints from patients. I did not hear of anyone refusining to let her take care of them. She was however found sleeping on the job and was fired for it. I did not have a problem with her and actually enjoyed working with her.
I have only met two people in my life (both male to female) that were able to successfully pull this off.
Neither one had surgery...I knew one before she had her surgery, and the other never has, but has had some plastic surgery (breast implants and the lowest rib removed to create a more defined waist), but that's it.
Both, were able to walk into a public place, walk up to anyone, and no one batted an eye.
However, there may be some legal issues regarding transgenders in the workplace.
I understand the difference between sexual orientation and men/women being transgendered...however, sexual orientation is protected in some states while those simply living as a transgendered individual without the surgery, are not legally protected.
To me, that would be your only battle, along with how realistic you are.
Specializes in Ortho/Uro/Peds/Research/PH/Insur/Travel.
Regardless of whatever lip service you're receiving on this site, people can be cruel. With that said, as long as you have a solid sense of self, you'll be perfectly fine. As a gay man, that has carried me through more than a decade of being out and has earned me the respect of many individuals, including my co-workers. I applaud you for following your heart and living life out loud. The world needs more people like us! I wish you all the best in your pursuit of a nursing career. : )
Specializes in trauma, ortho, burns, plastic surgery.
By the nature of my profession before and now, I meet couple of trans in my life. Most of them physically looking much better than me like a woman, looool, others..... And surprising or not most of them fell like women. I never meet the other side (I ask my slef how I will fell if I will meet a "she" became "he", or in transition...I don't know...)
You need "to be round" a splited one personality unbaalanced one, dosen't matter if is trangender or another type, that is for sure what society reject.
Don't expect ever that many from real world will accept them with hapiness. Is probably a cultural background somehow, a internal fear of humans. One is the gender and another one is sexual orientation, and another one is "inside I fell like..." For me, talking with people like them was one of the most amazing experince from my life.... because I fell so less women, around with them, just loking at them and talking with them. THEY ARE WOMEN! Fell like women talk like women, warm souls like women are supposed to be, loooool.
Is a big diference beetwen transex and travesti with inclusions somehow...
I think that you will be ok, like nurse, as soon, you will be prepared for that, for social interaction, just in case. Don't expect to open your self to much and people around you to cheerish with "welcome, we understand you" Is a nonreality. Yes people that I knew, couple of them was scarried. Are couple of woanderfull movies about...long therapies, expensive treatments and surgeries, short cuts to not pay the bills ...lool, people know about it.
I still ask my self why I fell soo good around with them? Probably because they was enough balanced to not scarry me, or hurt me or make somehow to fell bad. I told you that because you need to know, if you are yourself in harmony with who you are insiede, with your past and with your new prospective future, you will have enough power to be YOU and with others. If not... somewhere, somehow... you new life will trick you....
Welcome, for a new nurse, diversity make this life so amazing! Hugs!
Thanks for all the great comments, and I mean ALL of them. Hugs and kisses to all of you! No, let me one up that one. May the Lord bless you all as much as he has blessed me.
About half-way through the thread I began to feel that I may have deceived people here. What you all do not know is that I am separated from my wife and son (my wife ran off with our 2 1/2 year old boy on December 4th 2008 and I haven't seen them since), and I have stopped transitioning from male-to-female (the day she left) because of not having my son in my life.
I want to do what is best for my son, and right now the BIG ISSUE (it will be in the courtroom) is whether me stopping transitioning is really healthy for me and my son in the end. Make of this what you will. :wink2: To those in tune with the world we transgenders live in, and the way we experience the world, some of what I have said in my original post is wide open for debate. But such a debate would run completely away from the intent of this thread. That's really all I can say about that, as I will likely have a divorce case pending very soon.
All of what you guys and gals have said is true. Whether one transitions or not, one's gender and his or her comfort level with it all will play some role in the level of care that he or she provides as a nurse to patients.
Believe it or not, I live in the state of Kentucky. This is not a hotbed for transgenders, believe me. If you say 'trans' around here people think you're talking about fixing cars and trucks. I have known some transgenders here, but they are either are completely transitioned or are very good at performing in gay clubs. I just have not met any -- wait, I met one at a former employer -- that lie somewhere in between. I know of one nurse (she worked with my wife) who transitioned from male-to-female. She knew me from the gay club. :chuckle
I really appreciate all the support from you all, too. Not only am I TG and bisexual, but I am hearing impaired (bi-lateral hearing loss moderately-severe to severe) and have an anti-social personality disorder. The disorder is nothing major as it pertains to others, but it does affect my ability to create and maintain relationships. One very interesting thing to note, though, is that when I was presenting as 'Kristy', I was anything BUT anti-social.
Anyway, I will shut up. My wife, being a nurse, could very well be on this site, so........
enigmaticorange
32 Posts
Tackling the "not liked" issue- There will be patients that will not want a nurse because they are male, period. Or they will not want a black/white/chinese/indian nurse. or a young nurse. or one with an accent. You can make people both shut their mouth and reexamine their own predjudices- by acting professionally and kind, no matter how stupid they are. And that is addressing the issue of an obviously transgendered nurse. Otherwise; let the haters keep hating. Kill 'em with kindness.