Archetypes in Nursing

[FireStarterRN]

It seems like everywhere you go in nursing there is a similar cast of characters.

The Slacker

This nurse always operates at less than 100% and is a master delegator whose genius is being able to think quickly on a way to get others to take up the slack.

The Hotshot

Loves to run codes and start IVs in non existent veins

The Angel of Mercy

Mother Teresa move over, the Angel of Mercy is here to save humanity from suffering. She never complains and never doubts a patient's 10/10 pain.

The Showoff

This nurse never misses a chance to loudly toot his/her own horn. Also known as The Know-it-all.

The Critic

Always has some negative critique of the previous shift, or the work habits of co-workers. Often makes derisive comments when you give her report.

The Chart Guru

This nurse loves to chart. No form remains unfilled no matter what.

The Talker

Never shuts up at the nurses station, appears to be socially starved.

The Brown-noser

Fawns over management, kisses butt, is enthusiastic over any new policy.

The Moving Target

Either works in the float pool, job hops or works agency.

The Grizzled Veteren

She's been around and seen everything. A real journeyman nurse.

The Elitist

In a class of her own, a legend in her own mind, has a aura of snobbery.

Can you guys think of any?

[2BSure]

The Princess

The one that requires a personal, embossed invitation to participate in her job. Also, thinks she is a beauty queen and that the product of her elimination doesn't stink.

[FireStarterRN, BSN, RN]

How about 'The Union Rep'?

Knows every last detail of the union contract, and is constantly on a mission to bring justice to the noble and long suffering worker against the scourge of the ever conniving and evil management overlords...

[regularRN]

How about the gossip? - she (it usually is a "she", at least where I work) talks about everyone behind their backs but only to one person at a time in a "confidential" manner, thinking that no one will find out...

[coffee4metech]

hahahah PMS support group I LOVE IT !!!!

[JB2007, ASN, RN]

Not a night/morning person:

Do not look at let alone speak to this person the first four hours of her/his shift. If you do speak to said person within the four hour time frame you run the risk of having your head riped off. After the first four hours of their shift they are the nicest person you would ever want to meet.

The call light dodger:

If there is a call light on this person mysteriously disappears. They may have been sitting at the nurses station doing nothing for the last 30 minutes, but as soon as a call light comes on they are no where to be found.

The crap master:

If a resident or a patient is going to have diarrhea this nurse will have that patient. The patient may have been fine before this nurse's shift, but as soon as his/her shift starts the diarrhea will start.

[lisaksemt, ADN, BSN]

We have a rotating "Sh*t Magnet*. When this person starts her shift, the ER's magically come rolling in and the formerly stable patients either code, crump, fall down, become acutely confused/combative. Nobody wants to work with the "Sh*t Magnet* and nobody wants to be the "sh*t magnet". This person can be either a doctor or nurse or a combination of people. The effect is doubled during the full moon.

[Cassaundra]

OMG, these are so funny.

Have to add this one:

Perpetual Instructor - No one ever does it right. She is constantly correcting other people's techniques, meds, charting, scrubs, speech, walk, and a mirriad of other things. However, if she is caught doing something incorrect it was for everyone else's benefit.

[Hygiene Queen]

The Micro Manager:

The nurse who thinks no one else can do their job properly unless he/she tells them everything to do down to the minutest detail.

The Jumping Ginny:

The nurse who freaks out over everything. He/she makes the work place miserable because he/she fills the unit with tension so thick, it's suffocating!!!

Cool Cat Kate:

The type of nurse I admire. You never see them sweat. They take everything in stride and make nursing look easy.

The Sloth:

The one that sits at the nurses' station munching chips. You need to light a firecracker under their a** to get them to do anything and then they move slooooooooow.

The Gazelle:

Moves quickly, never stops until everything is done. They are organized and deft.

The Fruitcake:

Nuttier than squirrel. You wonder if they aren't a little bipolar.... can be manicky as heck. The weirdest and most inappropriate stuff spews out of their mouths. They can seem a little confused too. Often work in Psych, because they "understand".

[WalkieTalkie, RN]

We have a rotating "Sh*t Magnet*. When this person starts her shift, the ER's magically come rolling in and the formerly stable patients either code, crump, fall down, become acutely confused/combative. Nobody wants to work with the "Sh*t Magnet* and nobody wants to be the "sh*t magnet". This person can be either a doctor or nurse or a combination of people. The effect is doubled during the full moon.

This is my friend and I! Most times we work together, something goes wrong. A code, someone being put on ECMO, someone bleeding out, someone falls out of bed, etc. Honestly, for awhile we avoided working on the same end of the floor together because of "bad juju" or whatever. I know it sounds silly, but we as nurses are pretty superstitious :)

[FireStarterRN, BSN, RN]

I know a gal who is a 'perpetual instructor'. I float to her unit frequently and if I even ask where they keep their extra pillows I get a little inservice from her.

[FireStarterRN, BSN, RN]

How about 'The Life of the Party'?

This nurse loves to be the center of attention at the nurses station, entertaining whomever is there. They often double as 'The Slacker'

[I love my cat!]

The Mouse Hole-This Nurse is always carrying on how they will be supporting and standing-up for their fellow co-workers and love to appear as though they are a team player. This Nurse is loud and clear that they will never allow a MD/Nurse/Management/Patient/etc...to talk to their co-worker in any type of demeaning or condescending way. Yet, when a situation actually does arise, this Nurse is seen scurrying away into their mouse hole and sitting quietly until everything blows over. This Nurse never comes to the "rescue" of anyone. Always talking like the the tough one, but is really only a wimpy push-over.