Anybody else struggling with anorexia and bulimia?

tmulder · Jan 1, 2009

were you honest with your employer, about your current struggle, when they hired you? :uhoh21:

yes i was. my job has employed several people who are struggling with the disease or have been patients there at the facility. it is very easy for me (and others) to help other people, i am able to see very clearly what my patients need to do to recover, and it is very easy for me to care for these women who just can't care for themselves. i know what i need to do for myself, and that seems very simple, i need to love myself, and i need to come to grips with some bad things that happened to me in my childhood. i am tackling my abuse issues slowly as taking too much on at a time tends to bring out the ed. also, please keep in mind that for me, this struggle comes in waves. some periods of time are very easy and i don't have any issues, some periods of time are a struggle to accept myself and to eat appropriately. i have noticed that if nurture myself, the ed is a lot less prevalent. i have been very fortunate to have a body that is very healthy despite some of the things i have done to it. i honestly use my experiences from my life struggles to empathize with my patients.

to be honest i am a little offended that this question was even asked, but oh well, not everyone is honest. i figured i would tell them the truth about who i am and about the extensive experience i have had in not only dealing with my disorder but living with my mother who has an ed, my best childhood friend who still abuses her body and is afraid to seek help and so on. i figure if they are uncomfortable with what i have to offer, then they have the right not to offer me a position with their facility. i do not have to work for a living, i choose to, and i would be okay if i didn't work there. on that note, i am so thankful they gave me a chance because this job has made a real difference in my life. i have a much stronger urge to fight so that i never end up in an inpatient unit with my family left behind.

sorry that this was so long. and sorry that i got offended. i just try really hard to be blunt with everyone about who and what i am so.......no biggie.

Mariposa88 · Jan 1, 2009

Hi-

I'm 20 years old and have had anorexia since I was 12, with some bulimic behaviors. I'm now a pre-nursing student. I have been in hospitals well over 20times, and that is what has inspired me to be a nurse. The nurses were the ones that helped me the most.

Last year I was forced to go on a medical leave after my first semester of college and go inpatient once again. I am back in school now and finished this semester well, but am struggling quite a bit. I'm sick of the struggle and I know I have to stay healthy to stay in school, and I want to because I want to be a nurse and be an excellent one.

I'm glad I found this thread. I hate this disease and struggle and just want to get on with my life, but I DON'T KNOW HOW. I've been to all the best hospitals and treatment centers, and know what I NEED to do but its just a matter of doing it. But WHY is it so hard?

Altered · Jan 1, 2009

my job has employed several people who are struggling with the disease
it is very easy for me (and others) to help other people, i am able to see very clearly what my patients need to do to recover, and it is very easy for me to care for these women who just can't care for themselves.
to be honest i am a little offended that this question was even asked, but oh well, not everyone is honest. i figured i would tell them the truth about who i am and about the extensive experience i have had in not only dealing with my disorder but living with my mother who has an ed, my best childhood friend who still abuses her body and is afraid to seek help and so on.quote]
i want to make sure i am understanding what you are saying. please correct me if i'm wrong: you are employed, at an inpatient eating disorder treatment facility, as a rn. in the process of hiring, the facility communicated the desire to employ several staff who struggle with eating disorders. your qualifications, as a nurse, are: struggling with the disease, living with your mother who has an eating disorder, and having a best friend who abuses her body and is afraid to seek help.

Kolohe99 · Jan 1, 2009

Tmulder never said that the facility desired to hire a person with an EDO. But they obviously didn't exclude them either. I think this is wise on their part. If I were struggling with the disease I would have more respect for the opinion of a person who had actually "been there" than one who had only read about it in a book.

I suspect the reason she was hired though has more to do with the fact that she appears to be intelligent, articulate, and most of all...... tolerant. :twocents:

LaceyRN · Jan 1, 2009

I am a recovered anorexic/bulimic and I just wanted to offer my support to those of you who are struggling. It is a lonely and isolating illness in which I suffered for almost 5 years. I am healthy and happy now and I have not starved, binged, or purged in over 7 years. I just wanted to offer hope and let others know it is possible to overcome this disease and live a healthy and fufilled life. :icon_hug:

Mariposa88 · Jan 1, 2009

mixy, its great to hear that its POSSIBLE to recover, I'm sick of people telling me "you'll never recover"

tmulder · Jan 1, 2009

I was not going to come back to this thread because I was pretty sure Altered would say something that would hurt my feelings. I decided to come back to continue my communication with people who shared similar situations to me. I guess I should have stayed away, and i will from now on. People like you Altered are one reason that people end up with an ED or substance abuse. You are heartless, self-righteous and rude. Hope your happy now.

tmulder · Jan 1, 2009

You know what. Cross out some of what i just wrote. I still think that Altered is rude and self-righteous but you know what? I don't care. I know who I am. I know that I am a fantastic nurse, not just at my job at the eating disorder clinic but at the hospital as well. There are many things I doubt about myself, I probably will always have issues with my body, but I am not going to allow some bully come into a forum where people are struggling with eating disorders and addiction and make me feel small. So, I will come here when I feel compelled to.

I am honestly wondering, Altered, what bothers you so much about my situation? I think it is inappropriate for you to come to a forum where people struggle so much and belittle people. It isn't okay with me. I came here to offer my 2 cents and a shoulder to those who struggle as I do. It seems to me, you came here to tear people down. This definitely isn't the place. Be kind, be supportive or keep your comments to yourself.

Altered · Jan 2, 2009

you know what. cross out some of what i just wrote. i still think that altered is rude and self-righteous but you know what? i don't care. i know who i am. i know that i am a fantastic nurse, not just at my job at the eating disorder clinic but at the hospital as well. there are many things i doubt about myself, i probably will always have issues with my body, but i am not going to allow some bully come into a forum where people are struggling with eating disorders and addiction and make me feel small. so, i will come here when i feel compelled to.
i am honestly wondering, altered, what bothers you so much about my situation? i think it is inappropriate for you to come to a forum where people struggle so much and belittle people. it isn't okay with me. i came here to offer my 2 cents and a shoulder to those who struggle as i do. it seems to me, you came here to tear people down. this definitely isn't the place. be kind, be supportive or keep your comments to yourself.

i would apologize if i considered it reasonable. i used no insulting words or attack on your person. i was trying to clarify what i was reading, as not jump to any conclusions. i too have my own experiences with eating disorder treatment facilities and i deserve the same right to express my thoughts on the subject.

i have no doubt that i've gained insight from treatment and do not doubt your knowledge r/t nursing care. at the same time, i've...

actually, i'll stop there. i won't press the issue furthur. but if you are interested, i can offer first hand experience..hard questions i have to ask myself, daily, because of my history and the standards to which i am held as i nurse.

i like this point, made by the intern facilitating my group therapy session this last week..she said something along the lines of, "if you find yourself responding strongly to another person's feedback, hold on to it. consider every possible reason it ellicted such a response. it may make sense to you later on." this is not something i'm asking you to post..because that would be a snide remark. i'm simply suggesting everyone, myself included, step back and reflect. :nurse:

Trauma Columnist · Jan 2, 2009

Lets try to debate the topic, not the poster. This is a highly personal subject and as such, we can easily say things that might come across as hurtful. Thank you everyone.

tmulder · Jan 2, 2009

I apologize if I acted angry/defensive. I am fighting very hard to raise my self worth and self concept. I think what your therapist said rings very true. Because I so dearly want to hang on to how far I've come and how far I plan to go, I would be interested in your insight.

Altered · Jan 3, 2009

i apologize if i acted angry/defensive. i am fighting very hard to raise my self worth and self concept. i think what your therapist said rings very true. because i so dearly want to hang on to how far i've come and how far i plan to go, i would be interested in your insight.

i have a lot of respect for your ability to come back to this and continue to keep your ears open. that speaks great character. i think, because the behaviors speak nothing to the trigger, it's very easy for us to associate challenges with current/past unhealthy relationships. i turn the entire world into my mother..and of course, all hell breaks loose

as for my 'insight,' i've eager to share..and will share..but i've promised myself i'd get some studying done beforehand. i'll be back shortly, as long as i don't loose myself to the wall (sometimes it'll mesmorize me for hours)

until later,

to da loo :mad: