Any current/former nursing students have unsupportive families?

Virgo_RN, BSN, RN · May 14, 2008

Ugh. I'm sorry. The positive though, is that when you accomplish your goal on your own, it feels that much sweeter. Best of luck to you.

BeachBayNurse · May 14, 2008

Crazyco,

I personally know how it feels to be in this situation, but pat yourself on the back that you are realizing you need an education NOW, not when you are forty. You are already that much further ahead.

However, it is still a horrible situation to be in. My father had the idea that once you were eighteen, you were suddenly ready to take on the world. Nevermind the fact that I live in an area where the cost of living is unbelieveable. Some of my siblings because they didn't know better, or because they were too lazy to live without any luxuries to afford to go to school, started working in one dead end job after another. They also got married all at the age of eighteen thinking that person would make their life a little easier, started having children and are now totally miserable, divorced, with three and four children each and still without an education. I have no clue why my father is like this, as he is a very educated person, and even puts down nurses as being maids, even though I am the highest educated of my siblings.

Crazyco, you need to attack getting your education like your life depends on it. Being a nurse will open many doors for you, and although it is not the perfect career, you will have the means to live comfortably working three days a week, and not slaving away in some dead end job and barely make ends meet. Do whatever it takes: live very modestly, do not go out every night with your old friends, if you have to take one class at a time.

You can do it, you are already smart beyond your years!

roypatrick · May 14, 2008

I went to nursing school when I was 50 I told my dad I got on the deans list, he said, christ son your 50 years old cant you stay out of trouble. Become a Nurse for you

oramar · May 14, 2008

I went to nursing school when I was 50 I told my dad I got on the deans list, he said, christ son your 50 years old cant you stay out of trouble. Become a Nurse for you

:lol2:funny

oramar · May 14, 2008

It is OK to engage in a little self pity here for a moment or two, lord knows I have done it myself. However, as a grandmother, a nurse and a person who has had an interesting, successful life, I feel like I can give you some advice. Cursing the fates, cursing the past, wishing things were different will get you no where fast. Like I said I have wasted time doing it so I know how much easier it is to do it than to do something constructive. However, it is those times where you take a moment to assess where you are and what you have, then set some goals and make a plan to get to your goals that really count. When I was your age and had parents who were neither interested or capable of sending me for job training/higher education. So I first I trained as an LPN because it was much cheaper and all I could afford to do. I was lucky that my parents did allow me to live at home while I went to school, so that was something. Then I used the LPN license as a spring board to get my RN. Now I am not saying that is what you should do but I do know that you need somesort of plan for your life. Honestly, the years will pass no matter how you use them so you might as well use them to get ahead. You problem is not unique, I happen to know for a fact that in a lot of working class families children are viewed as a burden instead of a joy. Frequently, the parents most fervent wish is not for their child to get an education and have a good life but just for them to get out on their own and stop being a economic burden. It is just the way it is and the best way to live is just to accept the facts as they are and move forward.

Natkat, BSN, MSN, RN · May 14, 2008

I'm sorry for your situation. I know it's difficult. I had an unsupportive family too. They told me I wasn't smart enough to go to college and that I should get married and have kids. So I did.

Now at 46 I finally graduated nursing school last week.

At least you are smart enough to know what you need to do. I wish I had ignored my parents and done what I know I needed and wanted to do.

Find financial aid. Get student loans. Apply for grants and scholarships. There is money out there. It's takes a little bit of leg work and research to get it but it's worth it.

Good luck!

alyx · May 14, 2008

ya..wallow in the pity for a moment and then move on. Focus on what U want and then take the steps to make it happen. Join study groups and find new friends with similar interests to support you...and you support them. Giving of yourself brings the best blessings! And try to remember as the days go by...how NOT to treat your children when you have them...there are lessons to be learned at the bottom of the pit....put them in your file but not in your backpack..you have enough to carry...and you CAN DO IT!!! Chin up..chest out...breathe and look straight ahead!!!

Nightbloom · May 14, 2008

My parents couldn't afford to send me to school. Look at it from their perspective, maybe your parents can't afford it or they never went to college so they don't see the value in it.

I got loans to get through school the first time around, but because I have a bachelor's degree in another field, I now cannot get grants or loans of any kind. My parents don't see the value in me switching careers and they can't understand why I'm not using the degree I already have. In fact, they have gone so far as to tell me I have been disowned and they are not talking to me anymore.

I have applied to nursing school. If I get in, I will have to work a full-time job on nights and weekends to make ends meet and I will have to get a job in the healthcare field to get tuition reimbursement. It is the only way I can do it. I cannot rely on anyone else but myself. I have 4 children and all the responsibilities that come with being a mom. I basically will not see my children for 2 years.

Make up a plan to get where you want to be and take that plan 1 day at a time. If this is what you want to do with your life, then make it happen.

ann945n, RN · May 14, 2008

Im sorry you are not finding the support you need in your family. When people in your life fail to provide the support that you need you have to give it to yourself. There are many many options for student loans and grants. I would visit with and advisor and discuss your options. Most of the people I went to nursing school with had no support from their parents and got loans and grants and made it. Figure out ways to 'cut the fat' from your spending. Get rid of your cell phone, always eat at home, give yourself an allowance for fun and stick to it, it can be done! I had support from my parents but was still on a tiiiiiighhht budget. I cant say mine was the same but you would be surprised where you can squeeze money out when you need it. YOU CAN DO THIS, and do it now, like other said, before you are 40 with 3 kids and no means to do it. Now is the time. You are young and ony have to care for yourself. Now get to it :wink2:

rph3664 · May 14, 2008

Sorry to hear your parents are unsupportive, but as an older student, you will have an easier time getting financial aid, and you will be more focused and disciplined. I started pharmacy school 2 months before my 24th birthday (I had attended college before but didn't graduate) and NO WAY could I have tackled those hardcore classes when I was 18 or 19!

You will meet people who overcame obstacles far, far greater than the ones you have. One woman who graduated a few years behind me took 10 years to get her B.Sc.Pharm because she had an alcoholic husband, and gave birth to two children during this time. She filed for divorce the day after she graduated, as she told everyone she would do, but last I heard, they live next door to each other so go figure.

irish6363 · May 14, 2008

Well here is one more story to add to your list...I started nursing school at 40 with 4 children in tow and one verbally and emotionally abusive husband who would at a moments whim decide not give us any money for our daily needs . Yes he would pay the bills but that was it no pocket money. I was so fed up and ravaged by this situation I knew I needed a way out, a friend of mine was a nurse and recommended I look into it. I had an aa in liberal arts from way back 1983 which did me no good. One night after a fight I realized it was time to get over my fear of failure and take the risk..I went back to college and enroled in the nursing program much to my surprise I excelled despite the fact that everyone in my class was young enough to be my child. Now during these 3 yrs I had moments where I thought I was drowning in a sea of huge waves and on occasion coming up to gasp for air only to continue the struggle...until the day came when I finally graduated. On my graduation day NO ONE came on my behalf except for my 4 children ages 10,7,6,5 which I brought to the ceremony myself and sat them down. I invited my husband on that day only to hear him say he was too tired to attend. He made it very difficult the whole way thru by allways reminding me I was too old or I was too dumb or I was never going to finish for whatever reason he could thing of that day. I cannot go into the details of my story it would require too much space...but my point is PLEASE do not give up! there is a way out of your situation and you have learned it early on in your life that the key is your education in nursing. Try to stay focused no matter what! Find people that can provide you with a positive example and influence. Change your thoughts and you can change your life I truly believe this. Your brain is a tool use it to your advantage. Please if at all possible and if you are open to anymore suggestions read about " The Law of Attraction" and "the Power of Positive Thinking". Sorry for such a long post but I read your post and was compelled to reply and really help you out any way I can. Thanks, Irish6363.