Advice needed for coworker problems!!!

[kidnurse98]

I've been a nurse for 11 years and I have been in my current position for two. The last 6 months have been VERY stressful and I do not know how to deal with it. I have been feeling like I have a huge target on my back and that feeling was verified today.

When I first started this job, everything seemed to be o.k. The people are totally different than @ my last job. I honestly do not feel close to anyone, and this is two years later. I tend to keep to myself, do my work, my charting, etc. Working in peds you spend a lot of time in the room, esp. if there is no one else there with the kid. I ALWAYS offer to help people who need it, as long as I have time to help, I will. I provide excellent patient care, follow all policies, procedures, attend rounds, get my meds administered on time, collaborate with the MD's and NP's, etc. I feel that I am professional and have had nothing but awesome comments from parents and the kids.

The issue at hand actually started when I took this job. There is one PCA on our unit who thinks she is above doing anything you tell her to. You can delegate tasks until the cows come home and she does not do them. She used to correct me and other nurses in front of kids/family members on NURSING tasks. After a while I got tired of her doing this and I went to my manager about the problem. Later, I found out that my manager (who I rarely see or work with) and this PCA are very good friends outside of work and hang out on a regular basis. The manager had her come and talk with me, yadda yadda, all was well after our conversation....or so I thought!

Over the last several months I have had at least 5 nurses tell me the things she says I do/say to her! I overheard her talking to another nurse about me one day and I stood and listened to what she was saying. It was all lies, but people (the same ppl who complain about her as well) seem to be listening and believing her. I now have this rep. of being a total you know what, rude, crass, curt, etc. This is not me at all. I work hard, truly care about my job, attempt to do my very best while at work, I am working towards my mater's, etc.

Today, my manager came onto the unit and went to the "charge nurse" very loudly told her that she needed to watch my patients while I went with her for a meeting with her and the other higher up manager. I found this to be very unprofessional, but she really seemed to enjoy letting anyone who was nearby that I was going to the office. I knew that this was more than likely more issues with this same girl.....I was right! I went to the office with the two managers and was told that I have terrible body language, I do not delegate to the "PCA's" and that "several" people have complained about me!!! I could not believe it.....not only was I shocked but I was also very deeply hurt. I tried to speak up for myself but they did not listen to anything I had to say. They just went on, for an HOUR, with this and even said that I am not helpful when other nurses need help! This is a total b.s. LIE. I always help others when they need it. I rarely sit down all day, but I will help anyone at any time. I was also reprimanded becasue I do not delegate properly.......After the 1st time my "manager" said this, I asked ALL the PCA's that I work with how they felt about my delegation, etc. They all said that I was their favorite nurse to work with and that I was the only one who ever helped them with patient care.

The manager then told me that one of the patients said that they "heard me" say something bad about this PCA.....I never take care or even see this patient. Again, lies. Am I going to say I have never said anything bad about her? No, I have. Usually to my family or to a friend who I can vent to. I do not run and "tattle" like SOOOO many nurses do on my unit. If I see something that someone is doing wrong, I say it to that person-in a professional and constructive manner. After a while I got really really tired of what my "manager" was saying and I tried to speak up for myself......I told them both that I have had issues with people there, who have been EXTREMELY nasty and disrespectful to me, and I just ignored it.....and went on with my day.

This PCA has truly ****** with my job and two recent events have made me wonder if she is not messing with my license. One patient's vent settings were completely changed (the pt. was gone from the room for a long time that day and was not on the vent while gone. The only person I saw in the room was this PCA!) and I found another patient's tube feedings running through the gtube and not the jtube.....someone switched them! I am sure of this because I had already assessed this and I went back in to do the bath (that she was supposed to do) and found it.

I have a very strong intuition and can read people very well.....this chick is just crazy! I truly feel that she messed with both the feeds and the vent, idk-maybe hopng that something would happen and I would get into BIG trouble. When this did not happen, she has started an all out smear campaign at my expense. Idk why this girl hates me so much, but it is obvious. Not only to me, but to several other nurses and pca's who have said things to me about the way she speaks to me and treats me.

I got in trouble for not delegating, but after a while, wouldn't you stop deleg. if the person u deleg. to does not do their job or flat out LIES about it? Or if you cannot find her the entire shift? It is MY RIGHT as a LICENSED REGISTERED NURSE to delegate or not to delegate......am I right??

I just do not know how to handle this....I am very tired of it. I really love my job, not the ppl, but I am there to work. The more I think about this the more po'd I get! I do not deserve any of this and I have no idea what I have done to this girl. I TRULY believe she suffers from a personality disorder. Many other nurses complain, the other PCA's complain, the unit secretaries complain.....but nothing is ever done.

Any advice would be appreciated.....how do I deal with this? BTW my evaluation was great.....except for the part that my "manager" had to include about the things this nut has said. ALL of my peer evals were excellent, patient/family evals=EXCELLENT. I really feel that no matter what I do I will not come out of this o.k. Should I contact someone at HR?? I mean, isn't this some sort of slander or something along those lines???

Thank you for the help. Sorry this is so long, I just needed to vent!

[NocturneNrse]

What's disgusting.. is that it's TRUE, the easiest way to protect yourself is to leave this place. And, it is horribly unfair, unprofessional, and should NOT happen. Why is this behavior rampant in healthcare? I don't get it.

I agree that I would document all incidents and alert the board to these occurrences. This PCA is jeopardizing patient's lives here, and it should be investigated by an outside source, because apparently - management is only concerned with covering their own butts and this "friends".

Seek out other employment fast, get outa there before they DO make claims against your license. But, def. document, report, over document, and keep on doing your best. This really stinks.. I'm sorry you're dealing with this.. :hug:

[Mulan]

I think you need to get out of there.

How can you protect yourself against something like that, changing vent settings, etc.

You can't prove anything unless you could catch her on video.

[canesdukegirl, BSN, RN]

OMG, OP...I am literally sitting here with my mouth hanging open. The synopsis of the story that you are telling us here is that the NM has buddied up with this dysfunctional PCA and together they are using SICK CHILDREN to act out some sort of kindergarten ******* contest. I am simply aghast.

You are truly stuck. If you report them now, they will no doubt pull out all the stops, endangering their patients along the way to make you look bad. There is nothing that you can do short of carrying around a video camera or hiring a sitter for every single patient that you are assigned to. Anything you say will be challenged, and these chicks sound truly demented. I wish I could say that I can't believe that someone would do this in the field of medicine, but I know better.

My worry is that you will be blackballed by this NM in your quest to seek new employment. Thankfully you have your evaluations as proof that you are a caring and vigilant nurse.

As soon as you get a new job and are out of harm's way from these two jackwagons, you MUST report them to the BON. Can you imagine if a parent got wind of this scenario? They would be terrified. It is the stuff of medical thrillers.

My heart goes out to you. This is so nauseatingly unfair. You are right, Karma has a way of roping these folks, and from what you describe, it will not be pretty when Ms. Karma gets her hands on them!

In the meantime, get some co-workers to write reference letters for you. If you work closely with some docs and feel comfortable asking them to write one, do this as well. You don't need to tell anyone that you are seeking employment because you never know who will say something off handedly and then the Sisters Grimm get wind of it. Although I am not an advocate of telling white lies, I believe you have your back against the wall here, and I would simply say that you are looking into furthering your education (or something along those lines...you could even say that you are looking into getting a professional certification in your field, which wouldn't be a bad idea anyway if you aren't already) and you would like to have character reference letters on hand when you submit your application. If you are armed with these letters, then any retaliation that may come to you would be seen as just that-retaliation. They would then be opening the door to closer examination by the Risk Management department, which will have a domino effect to the Legal Department, and then to the Board of Nursing.

I will be thinking of you and hoping for the best. Again, I am so sorry you are having to deal with those monsters.

[Scarlette Wings]

:crying2:wow, that is the pits!

i am sorry you are going through this backstabbing episode. it hurts and can be terribly frightening to work when you are afraid to turn your back for a second lest someone stab you again.

you have my sympathy. nothing i can say can undo how bad it makes you feel. just know i have been there and done that and ouch, it does hurt.

[retiredlady]

I would just keep to myself and be friendly and smile. Kill her with kindness, but write down everything bad she says or does and then go to the manager or HR with your record. You need a record. Work another shift if possible or don't have her work under you, to avoid trouble. Good Luck. I have been there also.

[rn865]

Wow! I'm going through something similar, enough for me to start reading up on workplace bullying too. My problem is with a medical assistant and I'm an RN and she has worked longer than me too so she thinks she's all that. But I'm not gonna burden you with my problem.

My heart goes out to you. I think my problem is only 1/2 as sever as yours so I can imagine a little bit how stressed you must be. Other posters are right, if it is this serious, you might have to just leave the environment to protect your license. But if you will leave, you might as well make one more attempt to make everything right by going up to HR or the director. Find other nurses who will vouch for you and your work because it sounds like that manager will not do that.

And please know, that in the long run, that bully will dig her own hole and lie in it. That's how I coped with mine, I just tried to be kind to her and avoided saying anything about her to our coworkers. Now, they have each come up to me (even when I never opened up about it) to let me know how she has been talking about me behind my back and that they know it's not true because they have worked with me and I never do the things she says. And the good thing is, they realized that it is her who has a problem. And it's all her doing, not mine.

Good luck with your problem! There is a light at the end of that tunnel, no matter how cliche it sounds. Things will get better, I'm sure so continue to be strong!

[Old.Timer]

Unbelievable, I truly feel for you.

You mentioned that you will keep a record of your observations and things that she says and does.

I read a suggestion on this board not too long ago that I thought was really great.

It was recommended that you make your notes on a personal e-mail account and send it to yourself.

That way you have a date/time stamp to your documentation so that you can't be accused of a retalitory response if/when she finally goes over the edge and accuses you of something horrific.

Protect yourself and take care, it's not easy.

[Missy77]

I'm so sorry you have to go through this situation. It's a shame that some people make it so difficult for others that are trying to do the right thing. I wish I had some words of wisdom but the only thing I would do is try to find another position. Life is too short to deal with this stress. I'm surprised no patients have complained about this PCA? Unfortunately, I see this type of behavior from CNAs all too often. The petty, catty behavior for no reason. Everyone should be busy working but some seem to have time to gossip and spread lies. I saw this even in nursing school. Remain positive and document everything incident that happens so you can remember the details if you need to defend yourself in the future. I'm glad there are nurses like you out there that care for their patients and put their needs first. I pray everything works out for you.

[Missy77]

That's a good idea Old.Timer thanks for the tip!

[kidnurse98]

Unbelievable, I truly feel for you.

You mentioned that you will keep a record of your observations and things that she says and does.

I read a suggestion on this board not too long ago that I thought was really great.

It was recommended that you make your notes on a personal e-mail account and send it to yourself.

That way you have a date/time stamp to your documentation so that you can't be accused of a retalitory response if/when she finally goes over the edge and accuses you of something horrific.

Protect yourself and take care, it's not easy.

That is an excellent idea. I will keep things documented this way. It will appear as though I am emailing something instead of writing in a little notebook!

I have been a mess today. Wrecked with a terrible headache and stomach pains. I know that it is stress related. I am really very saddened by this whole thing. I really love my job, the unit, the docs, np's, etc. I don't want to look for another position, but I know that it is necessary in order to keep my sanity and my liscense intact.

I just hope someone will realize what is going on here. The NM didn't start out this way. At first she was all up my you know what. I guess bc I didn't pan out as awesome nurse and UNIT SNITCH, she turned the tables and is now making me her target.

Workplace bullying is a subject that is becoming more recoginzed. It is terrible that the amount of hits google makes if you search on nursing + WP bullying. The NM and this PCA are by far the worst ones, but some of the newer grads on the unit act like they know it ALL. It is so annoying, no wonder I look stressed and upset sometimes. I AM! There is no morale on the unit, and people do not tell on the PCA bc of the retaliation factor. I should have never said anything in the first place about her. Everyone says the same thing about her followed by the words "but the management just loves her". Ughhh, they are so stupid. I don't want to work under people like this!

I thought you needed really great people skills and one heck of a BS meter in order to be a manager in nursing.....guess I was wrong on that one!

[totrn]

This is probably not what you want to hear, but I would advise you to get out of there as soon as possible. You will never change the behavior of the PCA and there is too much going on in the background. Sooner or later they will find a reason to let you go. I have 25 years as an RN (12 as a manager). This is the advice I would give my own daughter. Good luck:nurse:

[msvegaslpn]

nothing wrong with the field were in....but it seems to me that we good nurses are being too passive.....we need to start speaking up when things appear to be wrong....we need to speak up when people are going out of their scope of practice.......we need to be advocate for the patients and advocate for ourselves.....if you just leave and dont say a word, you are letting the patients down because your too scared to speak your mind....someone will eventually get hurt at the hospital you work at....

heres an example that happened in las vegas

a colonoscopy clinic was using dirty instruments on patients and not following proper infection control guidelines with needles and vials....thousands of patients were exposed to hepatitis and aids......

many nurses new what was going on.....no one spoke up..........people would just quit and find new jobs....

after alot of hep c cases starting popping up in the vegas valley the cdc investigated...

it should of been stopped way before the cdc had to step in...

any who.....you can google the incident and read about how many nurses lost their licenses for not speaking up....even nurses who quit were brought before the BON.

so speak up and say something before **** hits the fan somewhere and your smake dab in the middle of it.

we nurses need to start speaking up and take control.....