i don't know what elese to do. my school...my alma mater...says there is no tuition assistance for me there, the ads on the computer for goverment grants all cost money to find out if you can get money, and by the time 2 more years roll by i am sure most of my classes will be too old to be of any use to me anyway. the only option i think i will end up with is to start over at a jr. college, and if that means taking all the science classes again...i don't think can do that.
a friend of mine told me that god has a plan for us all, and if we try for years and years to accomplish something...to no avail...that maybe it was not meant to be. i am a cna and maybe that is what was meant for me.
i even tried to be a phlebotomist...in the fall of 2000. i took the 16 week course, did really well...got a "b". a few weeks after finals i had our son in jan 2001. i could not do the clinicals right away because of that and could not later because my husband did not pay the tuition until 2004 so that class too was too old also.
i will have to renew my cna license and i will do that when i am ready to go back to work. i think it is time that i either choose another way to use my b.a or just be happy as a cna. after all, it is a noble profession and very necessary. it was just not my dream.
before i make any final decisions, i would like to ask...would any of you do it all again?. i mean would you really take all the classes again and re-do nursing school like you had never been there before?...or do you think i should just chalk it up to a dream that got away. i am 36 and my kids are 15, 8 and 4. i thougth i would never give up, but now i'm not sure.
i should also add that another reason i am beginning to think this is true is; because, in the course of dealing with some issues in my past, i have found christian science to be helpful to me. i am still however a catholic. btw, c.s is not scientology...they are not the same at all. i suppose it is logical if i am coming to believe in c.s that a nursing career would no longer make sense and i should continue to be a cna in a setting where i would not take part in the medical aspects of care. this is a quote from mbe that the same friend sent to me...
"suffer no claim of sin or of sickness to grow upon the thought. dismiss it with an abiding conviction that it is illegitimate, because you know that god is no more the author of sickness than he is of sin."
-from science and health
by mary baker eddy
390:20-23
i guess to sum it all up i am sad and confused and i would love to hear your thoughts if you could give me just a few minutes of your time. thanks.
i am catholic...even though i have an interest in c.s. so that plus 3 kids means divorce is pretty much out.
lorel,
i agree that it sounds as if are in a marriage where your husband is controlling to the point of being abusive. in fact, some of the things you said just broke my heart. i am catholic, too, and please know that the church is not so uncompassionate that you would be expected to remain in an abusive relationship. there are options, such as annulment (even with children). i don't mean to presume what is best for you, but i really feel for you.
hang in there, and don't give up your dream. look into employment which offers tuition reimbursement. there may be other options.
If you haven't seen "Fried Green Tomatoes", take five, rent a copy and watch it. Evelyn, one of the characters in this movie was wallowing in her own self-pity and basically being ignored by her lazy-butt husband...until it was dinnertime. Then she met Ninny Threadgoode. Her friendship with this 80-year-old woman who had overcome every kind of adversity imaginable and forced her to take a another look at herself...and she changed. When Ninny's home was condemned and Evelyn told her husband she wanted to bring her home to live with them. He said "NO!" Well, she got right back into his face and told him: "Don't you NEVER say NEVER to me!" Needless to say, Ninny came home to live with Evelyn (and fat-butt Ed).
What I am getting at, is that you can do ANYTHING if you make your mind up to do it...and you are TOO close to getting your degree NOT to. If I had not made up my mind to go back to school when I did, my son and I would have been on welfare, for my husband walked out on us two years after I graduated. You also have to think about your kids and how you would be able to support them, if the same thing happened to you. And, like your husband, mine wouldn't pay for my tuition, either. He even refused to sign the papers on my GSLP loan. Well, I did, and between that loan, working weekends, during quarter break and getting up in the middle of the night with a screaming baby, I did it. If I can do it...so can you!
i agree that it sounds as if are in a marriage where your husband is controlling to the point of being abusive. in fact, some of the things you said just broke my heart. i am catholic, too, and please know that the church is not so uncompassionate that you would be expected to remain in an abusive relationship. there are options, such as annulment (even with children). i don't mean to presume what is best for you, but i really feel for you.
hang in there, and don't give up your dream. look into employment which offers tuition reimbursement. there may be other options.
take care,
richele
thanks for your concern. i can deal with not having control of the money, and feeling like a child as long as i have some hope of being a nurse someday. i have survived much worse and i still managed to get as far as i did. thanks for all you have said and you are right...i won't give up yet. thanks!
thanks...i did not begin to rely on religion until recently when i began to deal with some past issues. that is when i realized i could not do it without god. rational thought alone seems to have failed me thus far.
if you haven't seen "fried green tomatoes", take five, rent a copy and watch it. evelyn, one of the characters in this movie was wallowing in her own self-pity and basically being ignored by her lazy-butt husband...until it was dinnertime. then she met ninny threadgoode. her friendship with this 80-year-old woman who had overcome every kind of adversity imaginable and forced her to take a another look at herself...and she changed. when ninny's home was condemned and evelyn told her husband she wanted to bring her home to live with them. he said "no!" well, she got right back into his face and told him: "don't you never say never to me!" needless to say, ninny came home to live with evelyn (and fat-butt ed).
what i am getting at, is that you can do anything if you make your mind up to do it...and you are too close to getting your degree not to. if i had not made up my mind to go back to school when i did, my son and i would have been on welfare, for my husband walked out on us two years after i graduated. you also have to think about your kids and how you would be able to support them, if the same thing happened to you. and, like your husband, mine wouldn't pay for my tuition, either. he even refused to sign the papers on my gslp loan. well, i did, and between that loan, working weekends, during quarter break and getting up in the middle of the night with a screaming baby, i did it. if i can do it...so can you!
never say never!
thanks...i'll rent it. i actually think i can pull this off...thanks to alll of you. i will let you know what happens and until then i will be around with whatever i can help out with. i have psych and spanish minors and i know some other useful cna/nursing stuff.
Specializes in PICU, Nurse Educator, Clinical Research.
hi and thanks...i don't qualify for financial aid anymore because i have a b.a. . my mom is broke and even if i was speaking to my dad he would never give me money. i am praying and i appricaite your support...thanks.
laurel
hi laurel,
you certainly have a tough row to hoe here. there are a few things you might consider doing:
1. do a web search on unusual scholarships, grants, and loans. there are gobs of scholarship money out there if you dig around enough- sometimes, they have odd requirements (like maybe you have to be a red-haired daughter of a retired police chief or something) or are given by corporations you wouldn't think of- i know that tylenol has a nursing scholarship available, and i'm sure there are others out there.
2. look into every possible healthcare institution in your area to see if any will underwrite your tuition. make sure you talk to the people with all the information- too often, people are turned away by gatekeepers (admin assistants, receptionists, etc.) who may not know that there are funds available. write letters explaining your situation to the powers that be, and follow up.
3. check into stafford loans. i have several friends who utilized this option, and they are all happy they did. yes, you'll be more in debt...but, like another poster said, it'll be a million times faster to pay off loans on an rn salary than that of a cna.
4. if you are active in a church, ask other members for any leads they may have on loans and/or scholarships available. it may be uncomfortable, but things pop up in unexpected places. i just found out that the mother of a friend is on the board of directors at my hospital. you really never know who might be around the corner who could help you out.
5. i'm a big believer in exceptions to the rules. just because there isn't officially money available for you to take classes, there may be someone in a position of power who would be willing to let the institution (either your hospital or your school) foot the bill for your tuition. maybe you could work out a payment plan? even if there's a published policy that prohibits it, ask. the worst answer you can get is no, and since you already anticipate that, there will be nothing lost.
6. i'm sure many people will disagree with me on this, but you might want to consider getting credit cards to help defray some expenses. since you have little credit history, it seems, it might take a while to build up a credit line, but it could benefit you in the long run.
7. it seems you have a lot of cna experience. is there agency cna work available in your area? typically, private-duty assignments pay far more than hospital or nursing home work.
8. think of any possible way you could make money, no matter how far-fetched, and investigate it. i know a woman who buys small stuffed bears in bulk, then dips them in melted candlewax, poses them, then dries them and decorates them with ribbons...she sells them on e-bay, at festivals, fairs, and the like. i think she has a cost of about $2 per bear, and sells them for $15 apiece. i know another who makes low-carb snack foods and sells them in a booth at the farmer's market each week. there are non-traditional ways to make the money you need; i even know one woman who worked as an exotic dancer for a year before enrolling in classes, and she made enough in those 12 months to cover all her tuition and expenses throughout college. perhaps not the path for everyone, but it's a creative solution nonetheless.
one final thought...if you've been to the bank to apply for loans, are you including your house as a financial asset? i don't know if you live in a community property state, but here in nc, spouses automatically share ownership of anything acquired after the marriage, regardless of whether your name is on the title.
i agree, though, that you need to think long and hard about your spiritual conflict before embarking on this. perhaps a resolution to that issue will open the door to resolving some of the others. no matter what you decide, i wish you the best of luck!
That is so true. You can't make excuses - you just have to want to survive the bootcamp called nursing school. I started with 56 in my class and we graduated 12. If I had it to do all over again, I'm not sure that I would. That's difficult to say since I started at age 17 and am now 45. I did take a short break from full time nursing to teach high school. I prefer bedpans over that without a doubt. I am trying to decide right now if I should continue in nursing - risking another spinal fusion or worse - or retraining to do something else. Nursing is an interesting profession but there is no glamour in it. I suppose, as a CNA, you are well aware of that. There is some truth in the saying "where there's a will, there's a way" but you have to decide if the battle is worth the fight for you. There are some posts here that give you some ideas on financial aid and so on. Some facilities provide tuition reimbursement to further your education. Depending on where you work, they may pay for your school if you commit to a certain number of years after graduation. I wish you well.
don't lose your dream of becoming a nurse, your only 36, you have kids ro raise for years, and they need money. these days it doesnt seem to make sense to claim any denomination, just believe in christ, what he did for us.thank god its not a science fiction based belief like scientology, thats all screwey. but, you'll work for the way it makes you feel in helping other. kindness , only kindness matters. i only had time to school so far (15 yrs now)as an lpn.do that first, it will open so many doors.don't let satan,the poor bastard angel that fell, suck you into defeat.,by overwhelming you into thinking you must only get a ba. or if you can an rn hosp.degree, then it'll be
even easier to get your bsn from there. i eneded up getting divorced because that evil side led me astray, then was caught up in the most (1) xxx(!) debilitating car accident, coma,trach,ileostomy,icu neuropathy--etc etc. i couldnt even breathe on my own, i had foot drop almost irriversible, christ healed me through a saint of a doctor dr. william charash of boston medical, to start with then, spots of people along the way of a 2 yr recovery who were filled with his love and may not have even known it, cuz i am, and didnt know it. i feel bad for t cruise, because he's supposed to be so loving and sincere, i hope he is just led back to believe in christ and what he did for us, thats all you need to hold on to. read the purpose driven life,and listen to dr.wayne dyer. i know nursing, and taking care of people, mostly the elderly, and i can't wait to start again, i have taken my first baby steps, i've already worked. but my corrective surgery, to anastamos the intestines back, then give me a stomach muscle wall, took 6 months to heal from a 12 hour surgery(what a man! christ! and dr charash!)and me! for making it! my saint of a mother!jane!! who stayed with me for 365 days, and healed me enough to wait on my own for my corrective surgery. its been a long lonely hard road.............but i"m back! back in the saddle again.......i'm only 4 yrs older than you., come on youngie, dont give up on being a nurse.
you may wake up, bleary eyed, coffee in hand and read this, and get goose bumps cuz its sometimes the small things(we think they're small,but god 's put them out there for you) that can make the difference,suddenly its 10 yrs later, and you think"what if i'd never read that, or believed it,where would i be".........now, i turn my life back to my baby, my poor sweet little boy, who was but 7 when my accident happened, he turned 8, his father stole him(and really thank god he loves him and wants to take care of him,although i want him with me ,living with me as he always has),turned 10 as i healed, is now turning 11, as i go back to being a nurse,so i can provide for him however i can.one thing his father does not know, the bond the umbilical cord provides,men can never experience that pain of giving birth thank god. ok, i am now wiped out this morning, i have turned my guts inside out like a washed t-shirt your folding.,turned my life out really. :balloons: congratulations on your baby......i hope i've convinced you. say a prayer for me(i am always with my son too , btw)that i take the best care of everyone at my new work and in my personal like and every aspect of every other person i come in contact with. sorry for spilling my guts.... always trying to lookup...
cj(lisa, actually)
i don't know what elese to do. my school...my alma mater...says there is no tuition assistance for me there, the ads on the computer for goverment grants all cost money to find out if you can get money, and by the time 2 more years roll by i am sure most of my classes will be too old to be of any use to me anyway. the only option i think i will end up with is to start over at a jr. college, and if that means taking all the science classes again...i don't think can do that.
a friend of mine told me that god has a plan for us all, and if we try for years and years to accomplish something...to no avail...that maybe it was not meant to be. i am a cna and maybe that is what was meant for me.
i even tried to be a phlebotomist...in the fall of 2000. i took the 16 week course, did really well...got a "b". a few weeks after finals i had our son in jan 2001. i could not do the clinicals right away because of that and could not later because my husband did not pay the tuition until 2004 so that class too was too old also.
i will have to renew my cna license and i will do that when i am ready to go back to work. i think it is time that i either choose another way to use my b.a or just be happy as a cna. after all, it is a noble profession and very necessary. it was just not my dream.
before i make any final decisions, i would like to ask...would any of you do it all again?. i mean would you really take all the classes again and re-do nursing school like you had never been there before?...or do you think i should just chalk it up to a dream that got away. i am 36 and my kids are 15, 8 and 4. i thougth i would never give up, but now i'm not sure.
i should also add that another reason i am beginning to think this is true is; because, in the course of dealing with some issues in my past, i have found christian science to be helpful to me. i am still however a catholic. btw, c.s is not scientology...they are not the same at all. i suppose it is logical if i am coming to believe in c.s that a nursing career would no longer make sense and i should continue to be a cna in a setting where i would not take part in the medical aspects of care. this is a quote from mbe that the same friend sent to me...
"suffer no claim of sin or of sickness to grow upon the thought. dismiss it with an abiding conviction that it is illegitimate, because you know that god is no more the author of sickness than he is of sin."
-from science and health
by mary baker eddy
390:20-23
i guess to sum it all up i am sad and confused and i would love to hear your thoughts if you could give me just a few minutes of your time. thanks.
Can you take out stafford loans? I had to take out my first loan two weeks ago after being accepted for Fall '05 three weeks ago and being told I need many thousands of $$ within four weeks. I filled out a few papers and within 20 minutes I was told all tuition would be covered. All I had to pay for was books and uniforms. I dont know what the elgibility is for the loan but you should look into it. Repayment doesnt start until 6 months after you graduate.
always trying to lookup...
Lorel
62 Posts