New DON is Unprofessional - page 2

I have a problem with our new DON! She/he gossips about other nurses often. I found out recently from a co-worker that this manager gossiped about me (I know it's true b/c she knew personal things... Read More

  1. by   skittlebear
    Quote from ROLO
    So, does she ever gossip to you? My boss is "just one of the girls," sort of wanting/trying to be everyone's friend, which I don't think is working. I've made a point, when she "goes there with gossip," to tell her that I probably don't need to be hearing what she's telling me. She knows that I am not into the gossip. I'd like to think that she thinks about what she is saying now, but I am sure that SOME gossip-type behavior continues.
    Yes, she gossips to EVERYONE. I will be standing in the room with 10 other nurses present and she will start gossiping. I don't know why, but some of these nurses are just awestruck by her. Yes, she's very smart, quick on her feet, and I trust her nursing judgement. Most of the nurses seem to like her. A few though, see through her like I do. It's not only that, it's as though she's on a "power trip". She's changing a lot of the way we do things. Some for the better, but also giving us more of a work load. I grin and bear it at work. I don't let her see how I really feel. I agree with a lot of posters on here, I don't think it would be wise to do so.
    She also berates nurses in front of other nurses as well which I think is horrible. It only stirs up more trouble. I will try to keep holding my head up and my mouth shut. Maybe she will dig her own grave (hey, I'm hopeful here).
  2. by   BabyRN2Be
    Quote from lowski
    It could be worse. Your Nurse manager could be sisters with the HR Director like in my hospital. Talk about trying to get "fair and just" just doesn't happen.
    Oh wow, this is sooo not right. I don't know about other places, but you can't work in HR and be related to any employee. This is true at my husband's place of employment... ie, I couldn't work in HR as long as my husband is at this job. And I totally understand the reasons, and I can't understand why it's not true everywhere. HR can hold some potentially difficult information about an employee, one that a relative shouldn't have access to.
  3. by   leslie :-D
    i agree that confronting the DON or going to HR, would be shooting yourself in the foot.

    however, an anonymous note under her door, may just be the medicine she needs.
    keep note short and straightforward: "your gossiping is bringing down your staff. please stop."

    it is so demoralizing to work with 'leaders' like this.
    you have my sympathy.

  4. by   SuesquatchRN
    Not related. Heh. I live in a small town in a rural area.

    My last place the HR director's SIL married the payroll manager's brother. The payroll manager's sister was the payroll clerk. The day meds nurse was the DIL of the ADON. Three of the LPNs were children of or married to the children of one of the med/surg RNs. The admissions manager was the brother of the CIO.

    That's only the beginning.
  5. by   caliotter3
    Quote from
    Crikey, talk about a rock and a hard place! Skittlebear, if you like your job and your co-workers, and the DON isnt going anywhere and you dont want to go anywhere (for now), then I guess you just have to cope. Be professional, stay out of his/her way, do your work as best as possible, ignore the gossip (hard because it hurts), and only deal with the DON if and when the need arises ..... and most importantly, be selective about what you share in the workplace! Chin up, it could be worse as lowski has said!! :spin:
    Ditto to the above. And I would continue to make it a priority to get on night shift if you think you can tolerate it. Over the years I have found that a good deal of office politics and day shift BS can be avoided by working at night.
  6. by   caliotter3
    Quote from morte
    also remember, that the gossiping behavior on the part of a superior, is not always as simple as it seems....they may well be soliciting feed back....of one variety or another.
    I also agree with this. I have known people who were on the "inside" of the boss and always going to her with "info". When they get together, they have to talk about something other than how their respective begonia gardens are doing, so I imagine a lot of the conversations are of the "gossip" variety and the boss probably needs to do very little "pumping" of the source.
  7. by   Straydandelion
    I would ignore and attempt to either change shifts, change floors or just ride it out being a professional in every sense of the word. You can always print this out and slip it under his/her door also ;-)
  8. by   caliotter3
    Quote from Straydandelion
    I would ignore and attempt to either change shifts, change floors or just ride it out being a professional in every sense of the word. You can always print this out and slip it under his/her door also ;-)
    Excellent resource. This particular DON should find a copy under her door within the next few days, just as soon as someone can find just the right moment to place it without being observed. For that matter, a lot of managers should find this or similar articles under their door this coming week. Just in time to start off the new year.
  9. by   dannyc12
    At my facility if I don't like the DON I just wait a few months for the next one to show up. Same for floor managers.

    Dilbert calls these people "bungee bosses." They show up, yammer loudly about changes and before you know it - SPROING!!!! - they are yanked out of there and replaced by the next yahoo.
  10. by   nurserin
    Doesn't your facility have a "corporate compliance hot line"? Mine does, it's an 800 number and completely anonymous. My DON is unprofessional and annoying, as with all of the "higher ups".