About eight or nine years ago, I was working in acute care when a nurse who was under Board supervision for diversion got hired and began working on our busy Med/Surg unit. She was not allowed to carry a key to the narcotics drawer, nor was she permitted to administer any narcotic, so the rest of us had to pick up the slack and give her patients their pain pills when needed. At first it was a hassle, and some nurses resented having to do extra work; but this nurse was so good at her job, and so willing to help us out wherever she could in return for our assistance, that the grumbling went away pretty quickly.
Soon, this nurse had become an accepted member of our group; eventually, her probation ended and she was given full privileges as an RN once again. She went on to become a leader on our floor, rising up through the ranks and being awarded a position as a resource nurse. Later on, she was promoted to assistant department manager, and the last I heard, she was still working in that position and doing very well.
The take-home lesson here is, there is ALWAYS hope for better days ahead, even those of us with addictions. The difference between the OP and the nurse I'm talking about is a good-sized dose of humility; while the OP hedges and says things like "I may have screwed up a little bit", this nurse took the ol' bull by the horns and was completely up-front with everyone as to the nature of her problems with drugs. She was perfectly fine with the admission that yes, she'd had a drug problem, and yes, she screwed up; but she never showed any evidence of self-pity, and she was content to pay whatever price she had to in order to remain a nurse.