Things you'd LOVE to be able to tell patients, and get away with it. - page 184

:spin:Just curious as to what you would say. Mine goes something like this: Hi, my name is AngelfireRN, I'll be your nurse tonight. I am not a waitress, nor am I your slave. Yelling... Read More

  1. by   Fuzzy
    How could you NOT notice that your dog had two open abscesses under his jaw? AND they have been there for a MONTH! Are you a FREAKING IDIOT? Of course you're worried about the cost. HECK I'm worried that you are going to leave here without paying us.

    Yes I love animals. I hate stupid owners..

    Fuzzy
  2. by   MikeJones
    "Your pain is a 10? Liar." haha
  3. by   Lynx25
    "Are you ACTIVELY on fire? No? Ok. Stop screaming and blubbering like that. I don't give a darn about you not getting a midnight snack anyway, you tipped our scales at 430."
  4. by   Jaimie.RN
    I can't like this enough. I'd love it if I had the option. I wish I could say this to everyone. I don't have time for you. Got a problem? Complain to my other 43 patients who want my time too. And while you're at it, get off medicaid because apparently their cuts are attributing to me getting more patients, less supplies, less funding to our facility, and I am the one whog es blamed for EVERY DAMN THING.
  5. by   Jaimie.RN
    I don't have contempt for fat people, but I do have a problem with having to spend an extra 20 minutes managing someone's blood sugar cause they eat candy and pop constantly. Also, I don't appreciate being told I am "worthless" and that you're "sick of waiting" because I have to hunt down ALL of the other employees on my shift to hoist your butt up to use the bathroom, which you can't wipe yourself cause your arm doesn't reach around. NO, I won't go during my busiest med pass to get you a snack when I just had to give you insulin. Also, your neck hurts? Your butt hurts from sitting? My arms and back hurt from lifting, pulling, rolling, and turning you!
    I pay medicare and medicaid taxes so you can use 20 o2 tanks a day cause you're too fat to breathe. Also, it costs money to get those TKAs and you'll just destory it in a year anyways cause you weigh TOO MUCH. You have a cough, but I can't hear lung sounds through your layers of fat. Oh, and you refuse IS too. You stink like sweat no matter how much we bathe you. You get sweat on me everytime I have to deal with you. It smells and is gross. You also should use the toilet instead of your diaper, since you're continent, then you complain about PAIN every time I have to roll you to change you and wipe you. And I'm busy, I'm sick of having to come in and put cream on your butt and nystatin in all of your folds!

    I have no issue personally with fat people, but honestly, whiny patients who are fat and cause me extreme amounts of extra work, I'M NOT FOND OF THEM. Most of them are obese cause they won't exercise and eat right. Not all of them have a health condition that causes obesity. When they say they have a health issue causing them to be "heavy" while they eat cookies, I don't buy it.


    /vent


    I'm not trying to offend anyone overweight, they're not bad people because of it, but having a huge morbidly obese patient is so much extra work and I hate it.


    Quote from TreehuggerRN
    What I find most disturbing (and heartbreaking) about this thread is the vile attitude and utter contempt a lot of nurses seem to have for fat people. Not only that, some of the comments confirm that just because someone has a title after their name does not mean they know what they are talking about, as many of the assumptions and tacky comments and stereotypes reek of IRREVOCABLE IGNORANCE, not to mention a total lack of compassion for a fellow human being. You fat bashers should be ashamed of yourselves. You also need to educate yourselves. Not all (or even most) fat people are selfish gluttons who eat themselves into oblivion because they want to make it hard for "you" to care for them. Their problems-including their weight-often go much much deeper than you apparently are capable of understanding. I'm sorry to be blunt, but this really makes me angry.
  6. by   Jaimie.RN
    Quote from fuzzywuzzy
    "WHY IS THERE ALWAYS SO MUCH CRAP ON YOUR BEDSIDE TABLE????"

    Because there are always some people who have mountain of junk on there at all times and it drives me nuts!



    HAHAHA I love this! I am soooo sick of not having a place for a cup of pills, a cup of water, a glucometer, ANYTHING because there's so much pointless garbage on the table!! Who lives with a mountain of crap piled next to them!?!?!
  7. by   Ruby Vee
    Quote from jaimie.rn
    i don't have contempt for fat people, but i do have a problem with having to spend an extra 20 minutes managing someone's blood sugar cause they eat candy and pop constantly. also, i don't appreciate being told i am "worthless" and that you're "sick of waiting" because i have to hunt down all of the other employees on my shift to hoist your butt up to use the bathroom, which you can't wipe yourself cause your arm doesn't reach around. no, i won't go during my busiest med pass to get you a snack when i just had to give you insulin. also, your neck hurts? your butt hurts from sitting? my arms and back hurt from lifting, pulling, rolling, and turning you!
    i pay medicare and medicaid taxes so you can use 20 o2 tanks a day cause you're too fat to breathe. also, it costs money to get those tkas and you'll just destory it in a year anyways cause you weigh too much. you have a cough, but i can't hear lung sounds through your layers of fat. oh, and you refuse is too. you stink like sweat no matter how much we bathe you. you get sweat on me everytime i have to deal with you. it smells and is gross. you also should use the toilet instead of your diaper, since you're continent, then you complain about pain every time i have to roll you to change you and wipe you. and i'm busy, i'm sick of having to come in and put cream on your butt and nystatin in all of your folds!

    i have no issue personally with fat people, but honestly, whiny patients who are fat and cause me extreme amounts of extra work, i'm not fond of them. most of them are obese cause they won't exercise and eat right. not all of them have a health condition that causes obesity. when they say they have a health issue causing them to be "heavy" while they eat cookies, i don't buy it.


    /vent


    i'm not trying to offend anyone overweight, they're not bad people because of it, but having a huge morbidly obese patient is so much extra work and i hate it.
    for someone who swears she doesn't have an issue with the obese -- and isn't trying to offend anyone who is overweight -- you sure have a lot to say about it. and none of it is phrased in an especially neutral or professional way.
  8. by   monkeelouise
    Reply in support of these posts.
    I am an RN and FORMER FAT PERSON. Been there, done that, wrote and burned that book. Talk about IRREVOCABLE IGNORANCE. You have a right to your anger but so do other nurses that are risking their health and livelihoods to care for obese patients. I am so thankful that there is a website that nurses can vent their frustrations and express our lopsided observations and warped sense of humor without condemnation.
  9. by   monkeelouise
    Or....
    "You don't know why you are here in the clinic being seen today" Hmmm, Were you ever SICK?"

    "No, We do not provide taxi service for patients, here is the phone book, No, I do not have the number memorized. Yes, I will be glad to look it up, No We do not pay taxi fares."

    This Actually happened- No sir, we do not give gas vouchers for clinic visits.

    No, Nurses do not fill prescriptions, No? Sorry, We do not give medications to you, That's a prescription.

    No, I cannot call "________" Pharmacy to enroll you in their prescription program.

    I'm sorry, I don't know why you are asked to pay your co-pay by my employer. Maybe they want to be paid something?

    I'm sorry the MD is not here, Yes, It is a conspiracy against strictly you! Not the other 199 pts we are seeing today! We picked your name off the census at the start of our shift, FEEL SPECIAL.

    Do you regularly get lost on your way home?

    Bill Clinton signed the HIPPA legislation. That's who says.

    No Maam, we do not provide snacks for your children, Is school out today?

    No street drugs? While I am looking at a +UDS.

    Enroll you in Free Care? I-Phone, fake nails, fake hair, 4 inch stillettos, OKAYY

    Yes, I can see that you have not taken your psych meds.
  10. by   Jaimie.RN
    I am only saying this in reference to the people who expect ME to throw my back out lifting them and refuse to help themselves one tiny iota of a bit.


    In real life, I have no issue with obesity, besides that it's unhealthy and I feel bad for people like that. When I was younger I was overweight. Now I am what most people would consider small, but I'm not trying to be insensitive, it's just my rant of what I'd like to say to certain patients lol.
  11. by   Jaimie.RN
    Also- for people who put their call lights on for care they know is coming, get over yourself. There's 40 other people who want the same thing.

    When you see me walking down the hall with 3 med cups, glucometer, strips, lancet, gloves, alcohol swab, a lidocaine patch and scissors and my clipboard and a cup of water and glucerna in my hands, DO NOT call out for me to help you to the bathroom. Guess what- I am busy, I have meds to pass, the aides ARE coming, and I HAVE TO GO TOO. And NO, I CANNOT JUST DO IT since I'm here, your neighbor needs meds too, and if they'er late, since I am the only nurse on this whole floor, I will get in trouble.

    No I can't go get you a juice right now.
    No, I can't scratch your back when you are 400 pounds and it takes 3 people to roll you and I am BUSY and you cry out every time we touch you.

    YES you need a finger stick.

    NO i don't give you lantus every night just cause I like to, I'd save time if I just didn't but I have to, no matter howwwww much you complain.

    NO I can't give you an extra sleeping pill/pain pill/any pill.

    Sorry, I know you are in pain because you are a new admission and the doctor hasn't called back to verify meds and the ebox is empty and I have no script for all the narcs you want and pharmacy said no every time I called.

    Yes you have to get changed and can't lay in poop all day.

    No, i don't get paid that much. Yes I know you hate the food, but it's YOUR diet for YOUR health and I don't make the food, just be glad that YOU get to eat at all, cause I don't.

    Your bed and tv are broken at 4 am? Sorry, I'm not maintenance and they aren't here and I don't know how to fix them and I don't really care that much cause you should be asleep. I'll leave a work order for them int he morning, but I have bigger things to worry about.

    NO you can't have another suppository, you already had one, plus MOM, senna, colace, and a sitz bath, PS you took a huge dump yesterday, I know cause I cleaned you up and it stunk. So shut up and get over it.

    No I can't send you on LOA with narcs for your mom.

    No, I don't do the laundry.

    No, I don't clean the rooms

    No I don't unclog the toilets, I'm not a plumber. Try flushing between giant craps next time.

    No I won't send you home or to the ER cause your bed is uncomfortable.

    No I won't take your temp q2 hours cause you think you're getting "something.

    Please stop wiping your feces on me. Please don't touch me after touching your genitals, picking your nose, or using the bathroom.
    Don't call me names, I don't appreciate it. Yes I know what I'm doing. YES I'm old enough to do this job.

    No, I won't call the doctor cause you think you need vitamin c from watching dr oz reruns at 2 am. No, yellling alllll night will not get me to sit in your room and talk to you about pointless things, other people need real care.

    No, I can't get you a recliner, extra bed, new mattress, etc or anything for your obnoxious, loud visitors. Stop running into me and over my feet with your wheelchair. No matter how many times you repeat yourself, I still don't care.

    Don't spit at me, scratch me, slap me, hit me, kick me, punch me, or cuss me out. I'm not impressed.

    No, your family member can't have funyuns, they are on a pureed diet.

    yes, these pills ARE poison, you got me!

    I give you all these for my health.

    No, I can't remember exactly which one of the 45 pills in this cup are which, just hurry up and take them.

    No, if you don't want them, pitch them, see if I care. I don't have time to sit and watch you spend 2 minutes per pill for all 50 of your pills anyways.

    Yes, I am a female, no, I'm not interested in you or your penis one little bit, nor will I wash it for you when you have 2 good hands and can change the tv channel and hit the call button, and no, you can use the urinal alone. And if you spill it on purpose, which I know you will, I will not answer your call light to clean it up.

    Sure you can refuse your bath for the 9th time in a row. You smell like rotting filth but hey, what do I know. That infection is looking reeeeal cute though.

    Sure, pull that foley and IV out, I love putting them back in while you fight me.

    No, I promise you got your meds, I don't wanna steal your synthroid.

    Sure, doctor, I already replaced that cath 2 times today, let me remove it and straight cath then put a new foley on. Makes total sense. And I definitely have time.


    O, sorry it's a holiday/night/weekend/you're at lunch when I haven't eaten in 16 hours, doctor, but your patient that you chose to take on as a patient needs something. So sorry!

    I'm following orders, if you don't wanna be called about 600+ sugars for a DKA patient, write a sliding scale that covers them that high.

    No, I can't tell you about your roommate, that lady down the hall, etc.

    You want WHAT

    yes, I know you went to nursing school for 6 days. I swear i'm doing this correctly.

    Oh, you've got a complaint, and you're a former nurse? Feel free to handle the issue yourself then, I have bigger things to do.

    Yes, I do have a life and family I'd like to get home to, so yes, it is a pain to listen to you complain, ask for trivial things, and talk talktalktalktalk at the end of my shift


    DO NOT EVER INTERRUPT ME DURING NARC COUNTS OR A REPORT, I MAY STAB YOU


    Yes, pharmacy, I know, no need to call 4 times.

    Sorry, I don't have the time. I have an assignment that would make you want to cry.
  12. by   Jaimie.RN
    PS- I don't get mad about caring for fat patients whatsoever, but if I have to hurt myself to move them and they are rude and abusive to me and take no role in their own care or attempt to get healthier in anyway, meanwhile collecting disability while I have to work for my money and pay taxes to support THEM, makes me angry.
  13. by   luckynurse_1234
    Just because you're a drug-addict, doesn't mean you have the right to swear at us and threaten to scream so the whole hospital will feel your pain when we refuse to help you OD.

    Also, to the patients who have a same-day surgery procedure but end up getting admitted because "I'm in too much pain to go home," grow up! It's pretty bad when the patient dying of cancer in the next bed is whining less than you are!

    To the supervisors who don't give a **** about what goes on in the unit, but who try to throw everyone else under the bus when something goes wrong they could have easily prevented, one word: karma.

    Finally, apparently it doesn't take intelligence, ability, or even ethics to get promoted: in some places all you need to do is waste space long enough.

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