Supervisor nit picks again

Nurses Relations

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I'm only writing because I have gone over this time and time again. I'm an LPN and feel like I need to throw the towel in only because one of the supervisor has it in for me and how much can a person take? How much? I have gone over this persons head and still this happens again and again. I am tired. I am a good nurse yet continue get the raw end and feel like maybe I need to throw in the towel and just give up. When is it okay for a supervisor to just nit pick and at the end of it all have a nurse want to throw in the towel, give up. I have no energy left to deal with this. My supervisor is actually breaking my spirit of being a nurse. Is it okay for this to happen? I say no but after awhile, it happens and I feel so abused. I am harrassed for sure yet no one will help me. I need my job, like my job but hate her. I try so hard yet nothing works. I can't please her or do anything right. Maybe I should just fall off the earth, I am so tired of trying to be a great nurse. My spirit is broken, my yearning to be there is broken, my being a good nurse is starting to break, I feel alone broken and lost. I am trying so darn hard to do what is right, yet it never is enough. My heart is lost, broken spirit and don't know how much I can take if any. I cry alot at work, I just want to do my job and have her off my ass and this is not easy, I work hard, I do my job, yet she likes to just nit pick. I would go elsewhere but I just started this job recently and need to stay put. My heart is hurt, I feel spent in all areas including being a nurse. I often think I would be better off never to be a nurse but its not me, its her, yet I cannot get around this. I need help, I just don't know what to do. I want to smile again, I want to feel good again.

Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).

Seeking counseling trough an employee Assistance Program (EAP) would be a good place to start, betweenus64.

Counseling with an EAP representative could help you in many ways. You could confidentially unload, discuss your options, and receive professional guidance, all paid for by your place of business!

The very best to you, betweenus64!

So after reading this, do you think its me or do I truly need advice on how to sort this out. If its me and I really need to do better, then I need to hear it, but if you have read this and feel there is more to the issue, please say so....I don't know anymore....

Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
So after reading this, do you think its me or do I truly need advice on how to sort this out.

That is one of the great things about Therapy. The Therapists guides us, so we can gain new insights and perspectives into ourselves and the situation.

In a nutshell, a good Therapist asks us questions on how we feel about the situation, why the involved Individuals act as they do, what can we do to make the situation better, etc. A good Therapist will reinforce healthy behavior and perspectives and question different areas so we may look into our own thoughts, feelings and motives.

Most of the times, we all have the insights and answers into any given problem within us- we merely need someone to show us that we know.

I sense you are a good candidate for growth, betweenus64, because you're questioning and are ready to take responsibility for your part in the situation.

Again, the very best to you!

Are you making sure your bases are covered each and every shift? I felt my supervisor was that way to the point where I hurried out of her sight so I wouldn't hear her nit pick.

i would never use EAP, never.

Well, going on to being great nurses, it takes a great supervisor to guide us as well when we don't know the exact answer, yet having the kind I have, the kind that likes to try to make you feel horrible about being a nurse, speaks to you as if you are useless to the team, is not a team player themselves and tries to suck up the bosses ass every time an opening occurs, well, I know this all too well. This is a new facility and I even made the comment , is it okay for supervisors to talk to employees any way they want. I was told no, but will anything be changed? NO....So I am holding on to my sanity by way of not being in or near this fat pig. She litterally looks the part, no pun intended but I'm so angry anymore. I try not to be but how can I not. Every time I work its the same ****. I don't even want to be there when she is but we work the same times and there is no other changing. I am over this place. I try so hard, yet, just one person can make it hard for a good nurse to be good and try to do a good job. Its sad that this place will allow a good nurse, one that is trying, one that wants to learn, do a great job, be there on time every day if not early, do my part, and still allow one person to ruin it. Its really sad!

No single person should be able to affect you like this.

She is only a supervisor. I will bet the rent she know what she is doing to you and enjoys your reaction.

While counseling is a good option, finding another position while doing so is even better. Once you know you are outta there, you will find tremendous relief.

Change is good.

Know your resources, so you don't have to ask this supervisor's advice or input but rarely. If she is picking apart you work, then ask "What is it that you are asking of me?" "Why is this not correct?" Specific questions as to what the goal is.

Now, if she is calling you out, calling you names, and otherwise making it personal, THEN you need to bring it forward up the chain of command.

If there is no response, your parent company may have a website where you can report this.

Get some therapy for you. Anyone's spirit can be broken and need some assistance in getting it back together.

Best wishes

Specializes in LTC and Pediatrics.

Three thoughts crossed my mind here.

1. Find a therapist to help you sort things out.

2. Quit trying to please her and do the best job you know how to do.

3. Start looking for another job.

Some people you will never be able to please. Do the best job you can do, making sure your patients are well cared for. If sh wants to nit pick let her. You know what you have done is right.

I think you need to so some soul searching and what is she picking on you about? Is it something that can get you written up about or is is just small stuff. Either way the behavior isn't necessary. Underneath it all we are all people. Don't give this person so much power. I just snapped back at my charge. I decided to get another job but not because of the charge, I want to gain more skills. I have a few days of working with this charge and I am just waiting for this person to give me some lip. Anyways you have to defend yourself or this person will torment you. I want to tell you a little story.There once was a charge that tormented many people, so those people ask not to work with this charge, their schedules were changed to the opposite of the charge, now after so many people have changed to the opposite schedule of he charge, she cries that she doesn't have enough help on the shifts. The charge realized it isn't fun being a 1 man show on a nursing unit. The charge has since changed the attitude to one more pleasant, now the charge doesn't have to work alone because people are willing to help the charge.

Betweenus64, you made the comment that it takes a great supervisor to guide you to be a great nurse. I actually disagree.

In my career, I've had one great supervisor. One in over 35 years and I only had her for 3 months. The rest have been anywhere from mediocre to terrible.

The one thing that made me a great nurse was me. I sought out learning opportunities on my own. I learned what it was that my supervisor found important for me to do and focused on being able to always say I at least tried to get that task accomplished or issue resolved.

Don't let your supervisor affect you this way and have so much power over your happiness.

Get counseling from someone who can help guide you through this. I think you dislike this person so much that she is going to annoy you now no matter what she does. I get it. You can only fix you. Take care.

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