Misogyny in Nursing

Nurses Relations

Published

[color=#111180]here's a small sample of statements i've read on allnurses.com:

[color=#111180]"the majority of nurses are women and women are catty individuals."

[color=#111180]"unfortunately, i don't think backstabbing is confined to nurses, but rather in the female gender."

[color=#111180]"women can be the most canniving(sp?) things on the face of the earth.

[color=#111180]i think it's just the hormone thing."

[color=#111180]"because women are such catty b*tches!!!!"

[color=#111180]"you are right that nursing is a female dominated field & females are the biggist back stabbers. a instructed told me this."

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[color=#111180]misogyny is defined as "the hatred, mistrust or dislike of women."

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[color=#111180]what i never realized until reading "allnurses.com" the past few years is how many women are misogynists.

[color=#111180]the first time i read a header like "why are nurses such backstabbers?" or a post that flatly stated "women are nasty, catty, backstabbers" i fully expected the poster to be jumped upon with both feet by every woman reading the post. when that didn't happen, it surprised, then disappointed, then dismayed me. when so many female posters jumped in to agree with these misogynistic statements, i was shocked and saddened. i am no longer shocked by how many members of this board appear to hate, mistrust or dislike women, but i continue to deplore the pheonomenon. and that so many of these misogynists are women themselves -- that i find even more deplorable. hypocritical and deplorable.

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[color=#111180]anyone defining an entire gender through a lens of hatred or mistrust is, at best, a bigot. a woman defining her entire gender this way is, unless she attributes these same negative stereotypes to herself, her sisters and her best friend is also a hypocrite.

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[color=#111180]how many of us these days would publicly refer to a person with black skin as "the 'n' word"? it's just not done. would you refer to your gay male cousin and his long-term partner as "a pair of ****"? probably not in polite company. yet women are called -- even in popular music -- names describing female dogs, names intimating that they earn their livings taking money for sex or names defining them by their genitalia.

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[color=#111180]if we feel so negatively toward an entire gender, how are we treating our female patients? i find it difficult to believe that someone can make a bald statement about how they hate working with women because they're all catty and backstabbing and then go out and treat their female patients with caring and respect. and if we're working so hard to respect races, cultures and religions other than our own, why are we not working equally hard to respect both genders?

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[color=#111180]the fact that so many nurses are women would have led me to believe that this is a female-friendly web site. instead, the opposite is true. never have i read the hatred and vitriol against women that i've read here, much of it spouted by other women who then go on to say "i can say that because i am female myself."

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[color=#111180]well, honey, i'm so sorry for you. i'm sorry that you define an entire gender by negative stereotypes when i'm almost completely certain you don't define people of other races or cultures by similar standards. and i'm so very sorry that you hate yourself so much you define your entire gender that way. misogynists are sad, emotionally stunted people. female misogynists are worse.

Specializes in Mental Health, Hospice Care.
I think you have to be overly sensitive to interpret "I say women are catty" any way other than colloquial shorthand for "cattiness is a trend I observed among women I interact with" when posted by a female in a female dominated forum about a female dominated profession.

Projecting misogyny onto that writing style in the OP was quite the stretch... concocting that strawman led all the way to equivocation with racial prejudice. Hilarious!

Trends and observations aren't absolutes or infallible truth, but some people are insecure, overly proud, or otherwise sensitive. This thread is much ado about nothing.

I respectfully agree with your assessment....

I remember my first experience with relational aggression. I was six years old, and a group of girls were sitting in a circle on the playground. One of the girls told an off color joke, and all the girls laughed. So then I told an off color joke I had learned from my brother, and the other girls laughed....except for the first girl. She threatened to tell the teacher that I had told an off color joke, and I cried because I was afraid I was going to get in trouble.

Back then, I didn't understand what I had done to provoke her. But over the course of my life, after many similar experiences, even as an adult woman, I've put a lot of thought into this topic.

People who are so insecure that they feel threatened in some way by another person, whether it be for the attention of the opposite sex, career success, social acceptance, or what have you, will try to knock the other person down.

Some people do this physically, while others do it emotionally. While there is a tendency for males to choose physical means and females to choose emotional means because of how we are socialized from the day we are born (Sociology 101), there are exceptions. What it boils down to is that insecure people will try to knock down anyone they feel threatened by. Some are men, some are women. Some use physical means, some use emotional means.

To define an entire gender based upon the behavior of *some* members of that gender is no different from defining an entire race based upon the behavior of some members of that race.

You can call me a misogynist if you like. I prefer the term realist. I call it like I see it. Having worked in a male dominated proffesion for a decade, and changing to healthcare I can wholeheartedly say it is totally different. I never, not even once, saw male employees plot to get rid of or be mean to a new employee. I have seen that done to a few new grads on my floor. Maybe men do that, but did not include me in their conversation? Possible, but I never saw people get run off. I never saw people get the cold shoulder or silent treatment. I did see people who were not the best of friends and some gossip, but nothing as mean spirited and hateful as what I've witnessed in nursing. I do my best to stay out of it, but I always have that underlying fear that the clique could turn on me. They seem to go after the new and nervous. I think I have passed the window in which I was most likely to be a target, but who knows. Don't pee on my leg and tell me its raining. I know pee when I see it.

Specializes in Mental Health, Hospice Care.
I do my best to stay out of it, but I always have that underlying fear that the clique could turn on me.

I just cannot stop following this thread lol...anyway, I have to say that being a man in the world of nursing I have witnessed some of these very unfortunate situations, I even tried to mediate, to no avail....I have a very good friend that is a excellent new nurse, and in her very first job she was quickly shunned and not included with the current group of females she nursed with....she told me about it early on when she had started....my advice was to simply go about her business, be polite and wait for them to warm up to her (she is very pleasant and not a "know it all" type at all)....I figured that she was new and it would take some time for everyone to adjust....wrong!!.....I gave bad advice evidently, the other nurses went to the DON and complained that she was too quiet, and had an "attitude"....this was on her third day of being on the floor....I think it sucks to be truthful and can't wrap my head around it....it was just a mean, non-supportive enviroment....I love women, believe me....I have the utmost respect for anyone who shows me the same in return....I think the reality of this whole dicussion is this, there are plenty of as****** to go around for both men and women....it sucks but it is reality......

Another thought, maybe certain professions just naturally attract a certain type of person.

I said earlier that office work breeds passive aggressiveness, while manual labor breeds physical aggression. Maybe what I *should* have said is that passive aggressive people gravitate toward office work, while physical aggressive people gravitate toward construction. Maybe nursing also just naturally attracts passive agressive people?

I lean more toward direct

confrontation than toward passive aggression and back stabiness. But then, I don't fit the stereotypical nurse model either. All my friends laughed their butts off when I told them I was going to nursing school.

While I agree with your post, Ruby, unfortunately my experiences with women in the workplace support the negative stereotypes.

Group dynamics and culture are myths? Someone better tell sociology.

Specializes in Med/surg, Quality & Risk.

I spent 8 years working in a male dominated profession before going to nursing school, and I have worked now 3 years in the hospital environment including during nursing school.....I'll take "catty backstabbing b!!!hes" over a bunch of crusty egotistical morons who think they're smart because they went to law school any day.

Specializes in Med/surg, Quality & Risk.
But I feel strongly in my heart that part of it was fueled by jealousy. While I did my best to keep my personal life private, she did know that I was engaged, was getting my BSN, and there was the matter of all of the visible praise I received. Meanwhile, she was in a sexless relationship (that she constantly talked about) with a guy who wouldn't commit to her, she had her ADN, and she received patient complaints as well as coaching for her attitude during the time I worked with her.

Dear God, are you for serious or did you just read "The Mockery of Nursing" thread and are joking

In a perfect world, women would all get along perfectly. There would be no backstabbing, cattiness, cliques, jealousy... you name it. Sadly, it's not a perfect world. If there is misogyny among women, then don't you think there might be a reason for it? Women aren't perfect creatures. I think that, as women, we know what to expect from other women! Same with men; men know what to expect from other men. I don't hate women just because I know and can predict how women act in social situations.

I think there is a difference between disliking behavior and disliking a person, or even an entire gender. I don't think that disliking certain behaviors classifies me as being misogynistic. I think women are hard pressed not to be misogynists. It's everywhere! I think for misogyny among women to stop, women need to stop the behaviors that give cause for it in the first place.

Specializes in Clinical Research, Outpt Women's Health.
I don't care what the environment is... you put a bunch of women working together and drama ensues. Womankind's behavior towards each other perpuates the stereotype.

I agree!

But, my husband works at an aerospace factory with predominantly male employees and they can be just as bad as women. However, they are much more direct and up front about it.

Specializes in Hospice / Ambulatory Clinic.

Part of the reason we do as women gang up on each other is women are collaborative and supportive. If one nurse gets a bee in her bonnet about another nurse there is a good chance there will be a couple of people there to support her and validate and stand with her to take it next aggressive level.

It just takes one pied piper.

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