co worker sharing her concerns - page 2

i work 12 hour shifts in an acut care setting. At 11 pm, i was told i would be precepting, and got a new pt load. the preceptee is an experienced nurse. one of the patients had been admitted for... Read More

  1. Visit  HouTx} profile page
    14
    (many years of teaching "management" classes)

    Management 101: NEVER take action based on hearsay or any other source of information that is not directly from the people involved. - that is absolutely fundamental.

    That Sup needs to undergo some remediation ASAP before she succeeds to alienate more staff. Rather than trying to play big boss, she should have just listened to the (tattletale) new grad and advised her (new grad) to talk to you directly about her concerns. No other action was necessary because the two people who were directly involved had already settled the matter & there were no patient care issues that needed to be resolved.
    Esme12, applewhitern, VickyRN, and 11 others like this.
  2. Get the hottest topics every week!

    Subscribe to our free Nursing Insights newsletter.

  3. Visit  gcupid} profile page
    3
    Quote from beeble
    i work 12 hour shifts in an acut care setting. At 11 pm, i was told i would be precepting, and got a new pt load. the preceptee is an experienced nurse. one of the patients had been admitted for bleeding, and had gotten 6 units prbc, 2 units ffp, and platelets during the day. last labs were at 4 pm, and none ordered until 6 am. i text paged the treatment team on call resident to ask if he wanted midnight rechecks.

    he immed called back, and started yelling into the phone, what do you want hgb for, tell me, and on and on. i told him last checks were at 4....he con't to yell ,and what do you want them for', i said, why dont you think about it, and call me back...he hung up on me.

    he shortly afterwards came to the unit, and half apologized, i said why do you hang up on me, he said, you were asking why i am asking you about why i needed a hgb, and to think about it and call you back. he said it was 'half my fault' but he apologized, and said he had previously just been yelled at. later he came back to the u it again, and sincerely apologized.

    i worked cooperatively with my preceptee, working together, explaining as we went along, letting her do what she could, ect, trying to make her feel comfortable and supported.

    in the later morning, i helped a relatively new coworker get some drips hung and deal with her pt desatting.

    as i was leaving in the morning, the clinical specialist 'asst nurse mgr', pulled me aside and said in a very challenging tone, like talking to a child, a coworker had expressed 'concerns' about a md interaction at the desk in front of a preceptee that was awkward. did i not have a scuffle with an md, ect, and that that lacked professionalis in front of the preceptee.

    ***. i was like 'i treated the preceptee as nice as i possibly could. i called the md for a hgb on a bleeding pt, and he yeled at me, and hung up on me. he came to the unit 2x to apologize. you dont need tohave an accusatory tone when talking to me. i am the last person you need to speak to about conflict, i am nicer to people here than 95% of your staff, and that means everyone fro the janitor to the attending. if this person were uncomfortable, she could have come to me, or not let me help her for the last hour of work. i resent the tattletailing as unproductive ans malicious, but thank you forsharing this with me. i will let you know that at this stage in my life, i will not work with this pettiness, and request a meeting btwn you and the staf person and i, as now this makes me feel awkward....ect, i was very upset...

    what do you think of the staff person 'sharing her concer', she is a relatively new grad....
    I love your assertiveness. Those are commendable actions in my eyes. My only question is how do you know that it is the new grad that had a problem with your professionalism but then you cover yourself by asking to have a three way meeting with the coworker with the complaint. Keep up the good work!
    nursel56, SoldierNurse22, and beeble like this.
  4. Visit  beeble} profile page
    1
    Thanks for the replies. I never thought about hearsay, but you are right, it is...She was not privy to the phone call, nor the 2nd, more sincere, apology, which she wasnt around for. And she didnt bother to ask me about it, like 'what happened?'...Yes the reaction from the supervisor makes me wonder what little esteem she has for me, and should I bother working for a unit that holds me so low....

    And you are right, I dont actually know what the report to her was from this coworker, but she did say that it was this coworker who made the complai t, couched under 'concern'. I do know I dont want to precept again, so as to avoid any further 'indiscretions'.


    Thanks for the compliment on my assertiveness. I am a pretty sincere person, and really do try to be kind to people(which may be why this rude md needed to think about it and call me back, lol). I really do give my heart and soul while at work, and after that, i feel i dont deserve to be treated poorly. i dont gossip, and i try to focus on doing the best job i can while i am there, and being supportive of coworkers, a team player....and no, i am far from perfect , i try my best at work, and i know others arent perfect, and try their best, and i try to be tolerant, and hope others are tolerant of me...ect Also, at this stage in my life, i donthave time for anything else.
    nursel56 likes this.
  5. Visit  canesdukegirl} profile page
    3
    OP, my responses are written in bold.

    i work 12 hour shifts in an acut care setting. At 11 pm, i was told i would be precepting, and got a new pt load.

    It's difficult to come on shift, get report on your pts, and then be told that you are precepting. You have to put on another hat, readjust, and then get report on your new pt load.

    One thing you can do to be proactive is to request that your NM have a written schedule filled out for the new employee, listing who she will be assigned to, and what her focus will be for that shift, based on her needs.


    the preceptee is an experienced nurse.

    How many years of experience does she have? Is her experience related to an acute care setting?

    one of the patients had been admitted for bleeding, and had gotten 6 units prbc, 2 units ffp, and platelets during the day. last labs were at 4 pm, and none ordered until 6 am. i text paged the treatment team on call resident to ask if he wanted midnight rechecks.

    Good for you! Nice catch!

    he immed called back, and started yelling into the phone, what do you want hgb for, tell me, and on and on. i told him last checks were at 4....he con't to yell ,and what do you want them for', i said, why dont you think about it, and call me back...he hung up on me.

    It's a knee-jerk reaction to get snippy right back when someone is being snarky with you. However, you have to keep your end goal in mind. In this case, you want the resident to order labs, right? No matter what he's saying, or how he is saying it, YOUR focus is to get labs. Instead of saying, "why don't you think about it and call me back", I would have stated the facts, "Dr. X., I noticed that there weren't any labs ordered for Mrs. Y until 0600. The last lab draw was at 1600. Would you like to order midnight or 0200 labs?" If he continued to get snarky, I would have just repeated the facts. Remember, you are there to advocate for your pt, and you were absolutely correct that additional labs should have been ordered.

    he shortly afterwards came to the unit, and half apologized, i said why do you hang up on me, he said, you were asking why i am asking you about why i needed a hgb, and to think about it and call you back. he said it was 'half my fault' but he apologized, and said he had previously just been yelled at. later he came back to the u it again, and sincerely apologized.

    Put yourself in the resident's shoes. If your NM asked you to do something, and you challenged her, what would you think if she responded "think about it and call me back"? You'd be angry, right?

    i worked cooperatively with my preceptee, working together, explaining as we went along, letting her do what she could, ect, trying to make her feel comfortable and supported.

    in the later morning, i helped a relatively new coworker get some drips hung and deal with her pt desatting.

    as i was leaving in the morning, the clinical specialist 'asst nurse mgr', pulled me aside and said in a very challenging tone, like talking to a child, a coworker had expressed 'concerns' about a md interaction at the desk in front of a preceptee that was awkward. did i not have a scuffle with an md, ect, and that that lacked professionalis in front of the preceptee.

    Your preceptee is a new hire. She hasn't established trust with anyone on the unit except the person who hired her. She knew that you had a rough night, and likely didn't want to add to it by asking you questions about why you handled the situation the way you did. I am just guessing here. Honestly, it would have freaked me out a little, too.

    ***. i was like 'i treated the preceptee as nice as i possibly could. i called the md for a hgb on a bleeding pt, and he yeled at me, and hung up on me. he came to the unit 2x to apologize. you dont need tohave an accusatory tone when talking to me.

    Obviously, you were upset when talking to your NM. Of course you are going to feel defensive. But you should not let emotions get the best of you when relaying an incident. Be calm. State the facts. You were absolutely in the right when you requested more labs.

    i am the last person you need to speak to about conflict, i am nicer to people here than 95% of your staff, and that means everyone fro the janitor to the attending.

    This is where you should have kept your emotions out of the discussion. The focus is the interaction you had with the resident, not how nice you are to the span of staff that you encounter.

    if this person were uncomfortable, she could have come to me, or not let me help her for the last hour of work. i resent the tattletailing as unproductive ans malicious, but thank you forsharing this with me.

    You state that your preceptee is a relatively new grad, yet she has experience. She is ALREADY uncomfortable. It's never easy to be the new kid on the block, and she has to adjust to many things, including new staff members, and how the staff relate to the docs.

    I would have been just as uncomfortable if I were in her shoes.

    I seriously doubt that her actions were meant to be malicious, because she has no dog in the fight. She was probably concerned about the relationship between docs and RNs on the unit, and wanted to get the NM's take on the milieu of the unit.


    i will let you know that at this stage in my life, i will not work with this pettiness, and request a meeting btwn you and the staf person and i, as now this makes me feel awkward....ect, i was very upset...

    I caution you not to make a mountain out of a molehill. This scenario is not one to lose your shirt over. Take a step back and remember when you were new. Everything was scary! Again, I doubt she was being petty, because she has no reason to do so.

    what do you think of the staff person 'sharing her concer', she is a relatively new grad....[/QUOTE]

    I'm sorry that you are dealing with an awkward situation...that's never easy. From what you describe, you seem like a very thorough nurse, and I applaud you for catching the absence of a lab order post-transfusion. Just remember what it was like to be the new kid, and keep being an advocate for your pt. All the rest is just static.
    Esme12, Altra, and nursel56 like this.
  6. Visit  beeble} profile page
    1
    actually, the complainer was another new staff, who had previously been an na on a different unit, she is a relatively new grad. my orientee looked at the md like he was from the mon, not me, and commented to me that she didnt see what his problem was. i made her shift as comfortable as it possibly could have been for her.
    Last edit by beeble on May 3, '13
    nursel56 likes this.
  7. Visit  Esme12} profile page
    0
    I am sorry you had to experience this......but there are going to be bumpy moments like this for the rest of your career.

    We deal with stressful situations, life and death situations, high stress environments........ all the while we are sleep deprived, over worked and way over stressed and for the most part...under paid. AND we have to be nice while we are doing this!

    I think the resident was out of line...but you didn't help by responding at his level. But remember the resident is learning and is not very high on the food chain...it is completely possible he was sleep deprived and had his behind handed him on a platter...and we all know about pecking order.....it doesn't make it right but it might help you moderate your response in the future. I also think the bystander (the third nurse) who was rubbernecking the situation. It all a game.

    I think that third nurse needs to mind her own business. The "Clin Spec"/asst manager needs some lessons in leadership. So many managers/educators are over whelmed by their own self importance.......the Big Guppy in the mud puddle. I have to say it annoys me.

    You are not going to be able to change these people but you can rise above the situation.

    First especially at night, I would have started the conversation with.....Hey.....resident...this is Esme. I am calling about ICU 3 Mr. Anemia who was admitted for bleeding last night and had received 6 units prbc, 2 units ffp, and platelets during the day....... their last labs were at 4 pm with a HGB/HCT of....it is 2030 and they are still/or not bleeding do you want a HCT/HGB before 6AM when the next is ordered? Their vitals are......

    I assume always that they have no clue what they are doing or they are clueless about which patient I am talking about.

    For the most part their yelling doesn't bother me...I don't let it under my skin. I will tell them however...that the louder they speak will NOT make me hear them any clearer nor make me move any quicker or respond with more respect.

    Now that doesn't mean I haven't hung up on a MD or two in my day......I remember one time I had a post CABG that wasn't doing a well...she was going to be dialyzed after being taken off CAVHD (we called it a gambro filter) who wasn't tolerating it at all..when I called the nephrologist all I got was screaming that I was killing her kidneys with he drips that high...I reminded him that if I don't get a blood pressure the patient was GOING TO DIE AND HER KIDNEY'S WILL DIE WITH HER! I hung up the phone and called the surgeon.

    He came to the unit with in the hour looking very impish and regretful.....I did forgive him.

    Pick you battles carefully. Watch your co-workers. Keep your friends close .....your enemies closer. Watch this nurse who felt you were
    coworker had expressed 'concerns' about the interaction at the desk in front of a preceptee that was awkward. did i not have a scuffle with an md, ect, and that that lacked professionalism in front of the preceptee.
    To your Clin spec.......I would have responded with.....Actually I was the one attacked by the resident and he later apologized. I am sorry "Jane" misinterpreted my interaction with the resident but I can clearly see how someone not involved with the situation would not have the proper information necessary to understand what transpired.

    There is more than one way to skin a cat.....We all have co-workers that we don't like...work is not the place to have "friends" but we do need to get along. Take it is stride...let it roll off...be the better nurse/person. Don't let them get under your skin.

    Good Luck!
  8. Visit  wooh} profile page
    1
    Honestly, you sound like you handled everything exactly how I would have. That's not a good thing. You sound much like me, I'm passionate about what I do, and I do my best, and if I get critiqued on how I did any of that, ESPECIALLY from someone that doesn't know what they're talking about? It's going to get me riled up.
    What Esme says is pretty good. Totally not what I would do, but totally would should be done.
    You got to let it roll off. One of my new coworkers, on her first day, made some disparaging remarks about another coworker. Oh I was out for blood after that. But the disparaged coworker forgave, and I figured I should. Now I absolutely LOVE working with her. I could still be holding a grudge, but the person that would hurt most would be me.
    New person thought (wrongly) that she was being helpful. She's new, trying to make nice with her new bosses, and went about it the wrong way. I guarantee her blood pressure isn't still high over this. Don't let yours be either.
    Esme12 likes this.
  9. Visit  Esme12} profile page
    1
    Quote from wooh
    Honestly, you sound like you handled everything exactly how I would have. That's not a good thing. You sound much like me, I'm passionate about what I do, and I do my best, and if I get critiqued on how I did any of that, ESPECIALLY from someone that doesn't know what they're talking about? It's going to get me riled up.
    What Esme says is pretty good. Totally not what I would do, but totally would should be done.
    You got to let it roll off. One of my new coworkers, on her first day, made some disparaging remarks about another coworker. Oh I was out for blood after that. But the disparaged coworker forgave, and I figured I should. Now I absolutely LOVE working with her. I could still be holding a grudge, but the person that would hurt most would be me.
    New person thought (wrongly) that she was being helpful. She's new, trying to make nice with her new bosses, and went about it the wrong way. I guarantee her blood pressure isn't still high over this. Don't let yours be either.
    Trust me I lose it now and then...and it was much harder when I was younger....LOL I play a part....detach myself. Besides I refuse to lower myself to their level.....LOL
    wooh likes this.
  10. Visit  meandragonbrett} profile page
    1
    You said your peace to your management team and it's now a non-issue. It was a blip in the day to day operations of a unit. Don't hold the grudge, be the bigger person, and let this fall into the past. It's a non-issue really. We all have little issues like this that arise at work. When you're living with colleagues in the ICU for 36+ hours per week tensions can run high at times....even with the people that you like.

    Pick another battle on another day.
    Esme12 likes this.


Nursing Jobs in every specialty and state. Visit today and Create Job Alerts, Manage Your Resume, and Apply for Jobs.

Top