Patient's Families as Facebook Friends....

Specialties NICU

Published

Hi -

Sorry if this has been covered at length, I did a search and it seemed the posts were more related to med-surg and as we all know, unlike med-surg we may spend months and months with the same family as they process the crisis that the NICU represents to them. At 2 am it is easy to chat about their work, your kids, plans for vacations etc. It helps establish the relationship and passes the time. Can the families and nurses understand the line between that and "real" friendship? What I am wondering about is... when these families friend-request you on facebook.... how is that handled? In my unit there are nurses who have families of CURRENT patients as friends, many many more who have families as friends after discharge. Some visit the babies in their homes or even baby sit and post pictures of them as they grow. And we have all probably seen the "went home to hug my own kids" post by our peers.... and it usually means something went bad at work. I wonder about the effects of these kinds of posts on the families. And at what point is there risk of HIPPA violations?

So... I have a few of questions....

1- Does your hospital have a policy on friending patients / former patients on facebook?

2- Do you personally friend?.... is it usually before or after d/c?.... why or why not?

3- Can you think of any alternative ways for nurses and families to keep up with one another without friending them? (like does your NICU have a family facebook page? -- or some other online resource for maintaining contact?)

Thanks for any feedback.... I LOVE facebook and some of my peers think I'm crazy for (almost never) adding patient's families! ~~ spacey

OMG, I would never take a picture of a patient with my phone, that is a big humongous HIPPA violation.

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Specializes in NICU, PICU, PACU.

We just had 2 people out on a 10 day no pay suspension for texting parents and sending pics...the parents put it on Facebook and it filtered back to management. HR told them that this was their warning. We have a very specific policy regarding crossing lines and social media. Remember, no matter how private you think things are, they are not. And on two cases Inwas deposed on I was asked in both of them if I kept touch with these families in person or by social media. No, no, no.

When we were inserviced by legal it was not well received, and people continued and two were caught. People just don't learn and feel it is their right to do whatever they want. Go ahead, you are only hurting yourself. When I see someone has friended a parent I block the parent and defriend that person.

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Specializes in NICU.

I've started hearing about that. At our NICU, a couple of nurses have made references to babysitting for nicu grads or texting them. Even at my old unit, a medical/oncology unit, some of my coworkers were FB friends with a former pt who is chronic and has potential for readmission at some point in the future. That just makes me uncomfortable. I don't think I will be reaching out like that.

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Specializes in CDI Supervisor; Formerly NICU.

I've had way more grief and headaches from having co-workers as FB friends than from having parents of former pts. I only accept the invitation once they're discharged, and won't even babysit my own grandkids much less someone elses kids. Never been asked by former pts, though.

Just recently deleted all my coworkers, as a matter of fact.

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I give my email address to primaries when they are discharged, but I let the family set the tone for tha amount of contact we will have. I've gone to the occasional birthday party. I am friends on Facebook with 2 parents, but their "babies" are 4 & 5.

My biggest challenge right now is one of my real world friends just had a 27 weeker. I don't take care of him, and the only time I have anything to do with his care is when I'm charge. She insists on tagging me in all of her Facebook pictures. Ugh.

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Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.
I give my email address to primaries when they are discharged, but I let the family set the tone for tha amount of contact we will have. I've gone to the occasional birthday party. I am friends on Facebook with 2 parents, but their "babies" are 4 & 5.

My biggest challenge right now is one of my real world friends just had a 27 weeker. I don't take care of him, and the only time I have anything to do with his care is when I'm charge. She insists on tagging me in all of her Facebook pictures. Ugh.

You need to tell her to stop....or it can cost you your job

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People are very very possessive of their "special relationships" with the families.....

(FWIW, this is one of the classic warning signs of boundary problems in professional/helping relationships ...)

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Specializes in NICU, PICU, PACU.

I agree, you need to ask her to stop. I know it will be hard but just explain to her that it could cost you your job if someone construed this as crossing boundaries. I am sure she will understand. We just had two people put on a ten 10 unpaid suspension for something similar. They were told to consider it a warning :(

You can change your settings so that you have approve any time someone tags you in a post also.

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Specializes in NICU.

I am friends with families whose babies were in our NICU, but I do not friend them, and I don't accept friend requests when the babies are still in the NICU. I am pretty careful about what I post on FB, and I would never say anything bad about my hospital on FB or anywhere else. I am proud to work where I do, and I take very seriously my responsibility to present my workplace in a positive light in all my interactions with family members, friends, patient families, and the general public. I love being an ambassador for my hospital in that respect.

Our hospital does have a social media policy, but it is pretty broad. I do know of people who have been reprimanded and lost their positions because of things said on FB, however.

Regarding contact with families once their babies go home, I have been to a couple of birthday parties, and I have visited babies when they were transferred to a local rehab facility. I have also been to a couple of funerals. However, in those cases, I am there as a visitor, not as a nurse, and I am careful not to overstep. And I would never babysit for a former patient...I think that definitely crosses a line.

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