Am i doing something wrong?? Plaese Help

Nurses LPN/LVN

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Ok , i recently started LPN school, i got a call from my sister, saying i should not do that program cause its about 30 hours a week, and i will barely see my daughter, i was being called selfish and materialistic cause iam attending a 12 month program, i was asked whats more important money or my 10 month old daughter,she says i want 3 cars in the driveway, she thinks cause my husband makes good money that i should stay home with my child, and i want to go to LPn school, caus eif something happens to my Husband....then we wont be well off anymore and iwil have to take care of my dauther and the finances.

I really thought that i was doing the right think by going to LPN school and now she has talked guilt into me about leaving my daughter in childcare 4 1/2 days a week. I dont understand this why do they think iam doing the wrong thing??? Cant i do something formyself? cant i better myself just cause i have a young child?? What do you all think about this mather? and have you guys had any similar experiences with family members?

I think you are to be commended for being a great role model for your child. Do NOT allow anyone to tell you that you are selfish. You are bettering yourself and your future for your family and that is a selfless act. As a single mother with disabled children and working full time, I too heard the snickers for going to PN school. Think of the rewards for you and your child and the sense of accomplishment. I recently graduated despite knowing all of those who were wishing I failed. You can do it, and be proud of yourself. And your daughter will also be proud of you.

WHAT??? I cannot believe this.. from your own sister?? I started taking my prereqs 1 month after I had my baby and have been going full time ever since then.. It is going to be challenging and difficult, but in the END, it will be ALL WORTH IT!! I promise.. I just graduated from the LPN program last month and am so excited to be working soon :wink2: .... After 1.5 years of schooling, it's such a relief to get a wonderful "CAREER" as a nurse.. YOU CAN DO IT!! dont listen to what others say, do it for you and your family... your baby will be so happy for you because she will have a mommy as a nurse :1luvu: ...Better to start NOW then later... GOOD LUCK and keep us updated!!

Hello!

When my son was three months old, my husband was hit by a car and killed. Things happen! It would be good for you to be independent if needed!

And you will be a good role model for your daughter while she is growing up if you are a nurse! Just my opinion, but I think that kids need their parents around more when they're older, especially Jr. High and High school age. Putting your daughter in day care now will provide her with plenty of stimulation and social interaction for her brain, besides, she probably won't even remember it when she's older! How many people do you know that are bummed out because they went to daycare as a child! I've never heard of one! Go for it!

Sherri;)

I dont think its a bad idea @ all...im 21 and i have a 18month old son and im just registering to take my prereqs. i think its a good idea to start school while ur child is young. ur child will think u later when he/she is in need of something or wants something and u explain to him/her that u went to school to have more money to support them. thats the reason im attending school. ur sister just might b a bit jealous if u ask me. if anything she should be proud of u. Good Luck!

Ok , i recently started LPN school, i got a call from my sister, saying i should not do that program cause its about 30 hours a week, and i will barely see my daughter, i was being called selfish and materialistic cause iam attending a 12 month program, i was asked whats more important money or my 10 month old daughter,she says i want 3 cars in the driveway, she thinks cause my husband makes good money that i should stay home with my child, and i want to go to LPn school, caus eif something happens to my Husband....then we wont be well off anymore and iwil have to take care of my dauther and the finances.

I really thought that i was doing the right think by going to LPN school and now she has talked guilt into me about leaving my daughter in childcare 4 1/2 days a week. I dont understand this why do they think iam doing the wrong thing??? Cant i do something formyself? cant i better myself just cause i have a young child?? What do you all think about this mather? and have you guys had any similar experiences with family members?

Specializes in Geriatrics, Cardiac, ICU.
Hello!

When my son was three months old, my husband was hit by a car and killed. Things happen! It would be good for you to be independent if needed!

And you will be a good role model for your daughter while she is growing up if you are a nurse! Just my opinion, but I think that kids need their parents around more when they're older, especially Jr. High and High school age. Putting your daughter in day care now will provide her with plenty of stimulation and social interaction for her brain, besides, she probably won't even remember it when she's older! How many people do you know that are bummed out because they went to daycare as a child! I've never heard of one! Go for it!

Sherri;)

I totally agree. Kids are more expensive as they grow older and they will need you to be there for them when they are in junior high and high school because there will be so many changes and problems they go through. Getting an education will enable you to help them with that hard homework too!

I don't think I could ever provide enough stimulation for my kids on my own; they have loads of fun at daycare and one of mine just finished first grade, so she is there most of the day. My other child starts K this fall. My daughter does extra workbooks I buy her and she reads very well for her age. She is also constantly saying she is reading so she can be smart like her mommy. Now that's good role modeling. We do things on weekends and we talk about my days at school and she shares with me too.

I have so much knowledge I can share with her. I feel like I am doing something that will benefit us all.

Also, after a year or two of nursing, I can work agency and work the days I choose, so if I need to be off for a ball game or a recital, I can do it. That's just how flexible nursing is.

Ok , i recently started LPN school, i got a call from my sister, saying i should not do that program cause its about 30 hours a week, and i will barely see my daughter, i was being called selfish and materialistic cause iam attending a 12 month program, i was asked whats more important money or my 10 month old daughter,she says i want 3 cars in the driveway, she thinks cause my husband makes good money that i should stay home with my child, and i want to go to LPn school, caus eif something happens to my Husband....then we wont be well off anymore and iwil have to take care of my dauther and the finances.

I really thought that i was doing the right think by going to LPN school and now she has talked guilt into me about leaving my daughter in childcare 4 1/2 days a week. I dont understand this why do they think iam doing the wrong thing??? Cant i do something formyself? cant i better myself just cause i have a young child?? What do you all think about this mather? and have you guys had any similar experiences with family members?

LET ME TELL YOU........I was told the same thing my old mean MIL, and I dropped out once, due to guilt, and then we moved 2 other times from my RN program and another LPN program....so here I am 14 years later and trying to get through LPN school again!! I am dealing with medical issues right now, so I had to postpone to start with the next class in October, and I regret not doing it ever since. I would have been more help to my kids and it was only 1 year. She won't remember this time in her life, and if you wait, there will NEVER be a good time. Don't you let your sister or anyone sabbotage your efforts and kill your dreams. You have to live YOUR life, not your sister. You can love her, but you don't have to like her, and its time to tell her to stay out of your life, and you love her for her concern, but if she is going to keep on you about this, you will not talk to her about it anymore. She sounds jealous and you are doing something to better yourself and your daughter. You be the role model for your daughter. In a few years, you might want to go get your RN part time, and that would be something great for your daughter to see. I find kids respect how their parents are, not by what they do or buy them. Don't be guilted into quitting, and I am really begging you of this as I don't want anyone to do what I did.....if you quit, you may never get the gumption to go back again.

Life has a way of getting in the way of living, so you may never get the chance again. Just tell her you love her, and you have prayed about it, and this is the time in your life for this, and thank her for her concern, and that is all I would say.

Please don't quit, and I will pray for you :)

Keep us posted!! I hope I didn't offend you, but I just hate to see you quit and you sound sooo good. We need nice nurses like you out there!!

:)

Deb

PS.....After reading other posts.....my hubby is a pilot, retired from the Air Force. I don't have to work or do anything. He works for Boeing in Long Beach now, and is gone a lot flying. My 2 kids are in college, and mama is home all the time, no friends, nothing to do. Well, now I am sick, but not for long. SO....I need to do this for me. I wish to God I had done this way back when, and I would be an RN now, and would be able to work PRN when I wanted to. We all need to have a purpose, and if something were to ever happen to my husband, health wise, I would have something to fall back on. I don't like some people "planning for divorce" that almost sounds like a self fulfilling prophecy and that is not something I want to plan for....and while I know reality is 50/50, I am not blind to it, just not going to put that prophecy out there to become fulfilled. After 20 1/2 years, I sometimes wish I could throw him off the balcony, haha, but I am so grateful I have a supportive hubby.

I need to do this for me. If you are going to be a stay at home mom who won't be happy deep down inside, your child will pick that up. Don't ever make her feel she was the cause of you staying home...no regrets!!

YOU GO FOR IT GIRL!!! I AM PROUD OF YOU if no one else is, but sounds like your hubby and I will speak for your daughter, and say that she is proud of her mommy!!!

Don't quit!!! Get your LPN, then you can do your RN part time and one day you will have something very good to be proud of!!!

:)

Love ya Sweetie!!! next year at this time you will have a cutie pie daughter who is still young, but will have her nurse mommy who will be happy!!! Then when she goes to school, she will be well rounded, and you can work while she is in school!!

The Green-eyed monster rears its ugly head. I think your sis is just jealous because you will outrank her and "have it all" so to speak. Do your thing school isn't forever. (it feels like it for me sometimes);)

Specializes in Geriatrics, Peds, MR, and prison..

Flower, you need to do what is best for your family and for you. Your child needs to be around other children also. I am having trouble with my 4 year old because she has not been in daycare since she was 2 so she is use to being with my parents or me. I wish that she would have been in a more stable/child oriented day care. I have been an LPN for almost 20 years and I am very proud that I went to school and have the education that I do. I do not have to depend on my fiance's income at all. If something would happen to him tomorrow I know that our daughter and I would make it. I think that you need to ask your sister if she will take care of you and your daughter if something happens to your husband because if you do not get an education or foundation to grow on now were will you be if something does happen. Many families live for today like my fiance, not tomorrow or the future. We all never know how long we have on this earth but we all will have bills to pay and they do not go away without paying them off. Every little bit counts. Plus, your daughter will be proud of you when you show her that she can do anything that you set your mind to. I am currently enrolled in a LPN to BSN program but I only go one night a week. It is still hard and demands time but you can do it. Last, What does your husband say? It is all in what your family needs not your sister. Best Wishes, Dani

Specializes in hemodialysis, heart failure, med surg,.

Ist off, its your decision, but remember you will not have time for anything else. I also attended a program that sounds similar to yours, but if you are going to get a degree, go for your RN! You will experience massive prejadice from other Rn's if you want to work anywhere but a nursing home or md office. But remember if you feel you need a purpose in life and want to know that you made a difference, this is the field for you. Just remember it is not how you think it will be when you first start.;)

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