Funny & Cute Things Our Demented Patients Say - page 2

by TheCommuter 22,470 Views | 82 Comments Senior Moderator

Anyone who works around the demented elderly population can attest to the fact that they sometimes say the darndest things. Mr. Rider is a pseudonym for the slightly plump octogenarian nursing home resident who had some... Read More


  1. 5
    The creepiest was a woman whose been sitting in a bit of a daze looks up at me and says, with all the seriousness of a fortune teller "you won't be here in a week" Luckily, I survived. Also, when ever she'd get really stressed and combative the best thing to do was sing "you are my sunshine" and then she'd calm down
    teeniebert, opossum, Orange Tree, and 2 others like this.
  2. 8
    Actually my favorites have been the demented who speak languages I don't know at me and we have conversations. I had a woman who would scold me in Vietnamese in the cutest funniest way. A different Vietnamese woman would go around to all the calendars and bulletin boards praying to them and receiving blessings. Maybe it worked-- she could walk better than anyone else in the place.
  3. 18
    Quote from lub dub
    A member of my family suffers from dementia, & I find nothing funny or cute about it. There is a thread elsewhere on this site that talks about the elderly being devalued, & I thought of this thread.

    Go ahead, let the flaming begin...
    I'm not going to flame you. We all cope in different ways. The thing is, my mother, mother-in-law and three of my uncles (my mother's brothers) are suffering from Alzheimer's right now, and my husband and I are acutely aware that it runs in families. We cope with humor, and I'm very happy to see a thread like this one. If you don't find it funny or cute, please feel free to ignore it.

    Mom was always quite social, and she was acutely aware of what was happening to her. There were times when she was depressed and despondent about it, but there were more times when she'd laugh about it. I remember taking her to a wedding, and just before the processional started, she loudly asked "Now whose funeral is this?" And then, when the bridesmaids started coming down the aisle, "****. I messed up again!"
    That was a funny moment at the time, especially with all the knowing titters in the congregation (bride and groom weren't well suited and the marriage lasted about a week longer than predicted -- six of them.) But for the next couple of years, Mom and I would laugh about that moment, laugh until we couldn't stop.

    My sister took her to a funeral, and Mom wanted to know whose wedding they were at. My sister has NO sense of humor, so it's probably better that way. You can get away with laughing until the pew shakes at a wedding; not so much at a funeral.
    Donna2011, LTCNS, TipToeLPN, and 15 others like this.
  4. 17
    Back when I was a CNA, we had to complete a 40 hour workshop to continue to work on the Alz. unit. They taught us alot of different calming techniques to use such as hand massages. I really enjoyed the hand massages and couldn't wait to give one to a client. So I'm massaging this little old lady's hands and I ask her how does it feel. Her reply was "ooooooooooh, honey........if only you were a man"
    annie.rn, Donna2011, LTCNS, and 14 others like this.
  5. 13
    I worked a few years in a dementia care facility, and I could write a book. One of the funniest things I can remember is one particular pt. believed she was at a hotel. I took her and her friends (a group of about 8 other dementia pts) on a tour of our "luxurious accomodations" and showed them their rooms. I had to explain why some weren't able to share rooms. Then came discussion of the bill. I explained to each and every one of them individually that their children had already paid for them to enjoy their stay. Of course, this led to a discussion about what good kids they had and then..."Is there a place for me to stay the night?" We went around and around this circle about 7 times before my shift ended.

    Get your giggles where you can, because in this job they're few and far between.
    CherieDavisMillsRN, LTCNS, teeniebert, and 10 others like this.
  6. 2
    The Brady Bunch was on TV when the client asked who was saying the prayers and I replied, "Mr. Brady."
    teeniebert and Hygiene Queen like this.
  7. 12
    No lubdub, many of us also have family that are in stages of dementia.

    Some of the behavior is angry or combative.. and some of it is actually a joy. I see it as they are childlike again.
    I often said.. if I get to that point I would want to be "pleasantly " confused.

    I could not imagine lamenting each and every confused behavior as a ... "oh poor Mr. Jones... he is sooo out of it."
    The fact is .... they have a cognitive decline that we currently cannot change. But we are choosing to assist them with that decline.

    It is so much kinder to join in their current "reality" instead of lamenting the decline and attempting to bring them to our reality.
    ama3t, not.done.yet, SlinkyheadRN, and 9 others like this.
  8. 8
    My favorite is a lady who would take . ...one of the many bouquets available on the unit...hold it like a bridal bouquet and

    "walk" down the aisle to her groom. Now THAT is a memory I would like to go over.. and over again!
    not.done.yet, LTCNS, tayloramaRN2be, and 5 others like this.
  9. 3
    I love my elderly! I also commented in the "devalued" thread. Dementia is not funny to say the least, but if we didn't find any humour in it, we would cry. Who needs that?
    LTCNS, opossum, and Hygiene Queen like this.
  10. 8
    My favorite was a man that told me "You have a short neck and should see a doctor about that"
    LTCNS, tayloramaRN2be, sharonp30, and 5 others like this.


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