Venting about classmates with families...

lorimar75 · Oct 21, 2008

"Let me not judge my neighbor until I have walked a mile in his moccasins."

One thing that Motherhood has taught me for SURE: Humility.

EricJRN, MSN, RN · Oct 21, 2008

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Valerie Salva, BSN, RN · Oct 24, 2008

I agree with the OP that sometimes people can use their families/children as a scapegoat for a reason for bad grades, but I would just like to remind them that there are many who do not. I have a husband and four wonderful children (14, 12, 10, 6) who are very supportive, very helpful around the house or with child care. I can't imagine making this journey without them behind me. I have NEVER complained about my family creating problems for me, and am sitting fairly close to the top of my NS class. I work very hard, never compare my life to my friends in NS, and NEVER try to sell anything (I hate fund-raisers anyway). Of my four best buds in NS - two are not married/no kids, one is married/no kids, and one is married/1 kid. It's just not a big deal, and we're all very supportive to each other.
I also work PT in our local ER as a PCA and have always worked my share of holidays. If my kids are sick, I have back-up. If I'm working on Christmas, we celebrate the day before. I do not, nor have I ever, expect to be off just because "I have kids". I realize that family is important, and single people enjoy the holidays with their families just as much as anyone.
Just my . Remember not to lump everyone together in one group - we're all different! :-)

:up: :yeah: :yeah: :yeah: :yeah: :yeah: :up:

bellalen · Oct 27, 2008

I think we as people and nursing profesionals or students all feel that we need a sounding board. I am a mother a wife a taxi a teacher a... yes we all carry different hats, but I think that is just what life is all about. But everyone has their own way of dealing with the drama in life. I think its just good to have an open mind, and heart. Sometimes when we are so involved we cant take a step back to see outside in, and I think thats way people look to each other for advice, or common ground on how to get through the hurdles of life, so that we can all finish the race and be able to help the next person who needs that little kernal of wisdom that you have learned by listening to someones elses struggle. We all just need to be willing to reach out and listen, you never know when its you who will need the ear to listen back. :heartbeat

kkcontractors · Oct 27, 2008

Very True and well put.. Life has a way of humbling you sometimes, life is seasons, good and bad. Usually, everyone, at some point or another will have good and shall I say tough seasons...

swtstephy · Nov 16, 2008

I agree I am in both situations believe it or not...It was *%#@ stressful trying to work fulltime even part time being single, no kids and time on my hands...DANG...no support from parents or anyone for that fact...it takes a toll on you...NOW...LoL...Brace yourself...hahaha...a fiance and a 6month old...no support NOW A SINGLE MOM...ahahaha...working and with 6month son and work...and you know what I now have more motivation and determination!!!...my son is my explicit reason why I NEED TO DO THIS...even if it's on my own...it is hard in any situation...everyone has different stresses...but let me tell you this...if you believe and put your mind to something NO ONE AND I MEAN NO ONE can change your mind and you are your only BIGGEST adversary!!!...hope this helps anyone!!!...but everyone hang in there...the prize RN DEGREE:hpygrp:

kikibibi · Nov 16, 2008

It is really hard to have kids and at the same time going to nursing school. you should be proud of yourself. About your classmate, try not to pay attention becuse it is a human nature.

sdjohnso · Nov 16, 2008

Seems to me they may be trying to live vicariously through you. Just like high school where kids would pick on you because they're jealous. It's aggravating, but you've got it wherever you go. High school "never" ends. :bluecry1:

sparketteinok · Nov 17, 2008

"High school "never" ends."

Amen.

Isn't it crazy that when you put adults together in a large work place, most end up behaving like sixth graders??

Butterfliesnroses · Nov 17, 2008

5 years ago I went to school part time and worked full time. I had a boyfriend. I lived with mommy and daddy, then with his mom and her boyfriend, and then with just him. While going to school part time and working full time. I had my share of issues. Now I'm going to school full time and working full time, plus I live with my boyfriend and daughter. I'm also the breadwinner of the family. I certainly have my share of issues. There are weeks I barely get all the crap done that need to be done. There are days where I spend all day with my daughter regardless of the fact that I know I could be cleaning house or doing homework. But she's totally worth it. I'm still taking my pre-reqs BTW. The plan is when I go into the nursing program (hopefully next year), to work weekends or PRN. I think I actually study more and work harder than I did back then. Back then it was just for me. Now it's for this beautiful daughter. I want the best for her! I do have to say that it does irritate me when I have the girl next to me saying how hard she has it when she lives with her parents and doesn't work. But I also realize that those are her choices and the ones I've made are mine and I wouldn't trade my life in for anything!

Also I remember back before I had kids when we would be on low census, I had someone tell me I should take more days off since I didn't have kids. UH NO! I still had bills to pay. Even now I don't think I should get more hours because I have kids. I think I should get more hours because I have more seniority though. Also the holiday thing would drive me nuts. My daughter just turned one and I had a nurse tell me I should work all the holidays since my daughter wouldn't remember it. I said no but I will...This nurse also has a 14 year old and so I said well maybe you should work the holidays since your son won't really care anyways. She got the point and I told her I felt the same way. Also I remember before kids people expecting me to work since I didn't have kids. I said I still had family. This time around I found myself thinking that the people without kids or with grown kids should work the holidays...then I kicked myself! These people still have family and would like the time off. Sometimes it's so hard to remember what it was like or what it is like for someone else. Walk a mile in my shoes...

ohioln, RN · Nov 17, 2008

I don't know if my reply logged or not, so I'm repeating it. I also agree with both sides. A single person needs emotional support going through school, which they need to get somewhere bec. they're alone. A person who has a family usually gets support from their spouse, but they're away from the family more bec. of school, which creates stress for them and their family, so both have something to bear going through school.