To resign early or risk getting fired?

Nurses Relations

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I've been at my hospital job for three and a half months and just received my 90 eval. The only criticism I received was something along the lines of "You need to smile more and be more welcoming to people" What the hell is that?

I am always early to work, I am professional, I get the job done, I am polite and respect my patients. Unfortunately the charge nurse is a cow that sits at her desk and gossips the entire time and does not help anyone with ANYTHING.

I'm a relatively new nurse and have been encouraged by the Director to ask questions and ask for help if I need it. The director has notified me that the charge nurse and manager of the unit have stated that I don't smile enough (am i supposed to have a smile plastered on my face all day??), that I don't ask for help and they think I am too proud to ask (which is bull because I always ask especially if I am unfamiliar with something - which I DID ON ONE OCCASION AND DID NOT RECEIVE ANY HELP), and that I don't look comfortable and appear tense (HELLO, this is a tele unit, it gets crazy sometimes, i'm not the only nurse that gets stressed out).

Basically the only criticism I received was "You need to be more welcoming to others, if this is not something that can't be worked on during the EXTENDED 30 DAY PROBATION, then maybe this type of work environment isn't right for you". I feel like i'm being picked on or something. First off, my patients love me. I have been praised by the CEO for going out of my way and doing something for a patient that was much appreciated. Yet all the good things are overlooked and me not being a fake person is going to get my fired.

I was planning on resigning in a couple of months to pursue a graduate degree in NY but I feel like this is not an acceptable reason for me to be let go. So now before this 30 day mark I think I should resign and just relax for a month before I move. Any input would be appreciated. I am just furious with this situation. Oh and get this, the director is like "I don't know how you are with your patients so I will be around more to see your interactions". This is ridiculous and I am not the first nurse at the hospital to complain about the "culture" of the workplace. So resign in two weeks then just do the school thing? I don't think it will be a dealbreaker later when I look for a job considering I am moving for graduate school in the fall. HELP :madface: :mad: :argue: :confused: :uhoh21:

Specializes in Forensic Psych.

I was kicked out of 9th grade a Capella choir because I didn't smile enough. I feel your pain.

Sounds like a bruised ego to me. I get it, I do, but don't let your ego make your path through life for you. Smile! Somebody

I think you and I would get along well. I'm the exact same way. I keep up a nice face for my patients and family members, but my coworkers are my safe haven and my confidants. I can ask them for help, complain to them about the doctors, whine to them about the unfairness of my patient's condition, and they know they can do the same with me. Personally, I'd have it no other way. The nurse's station is a neutral zone. If you need help, you'll find it there. If you need to vent, you'll find it there too--only further in the back so none of the patients or families can hear you.

Perhaps your charge nurse is a cow. Maybe she's just a fan of splotchy white and black scrubs. Either way, it's really more about your perception than anything else because you're the one that has to live in your workplace, not any of us. However, because you asked, if I were you, I'd get another job or go back to school before I'd stay at a hospital where the management expected me to paste on a smile and pretend nothing was wrong. That's the same kind of management that will sell you down the river when the **** hits the fan.

If it were me, knowing I was leaving, I would have to know who's invention this "problem" of mine was. It may not help you smile more though. I would go fishing and get somebody to tell me what their real problem is. Example: "Hey, Karen, you seem to never get stressed out. I was wondering if you could give me some pointers on looking more relaxed. I have recently gotten some feedback that says I seem stressed, don't smile, ect." I would smile the whole time I watched whoever I suspected said something either squirm or come out with it. Then I would suck it up, and try to whatever whichever person wanted me to do. I waited tables in college. Sometimes you just gotta tell yourself this person is rude, two-faced, whatever they may be, but I will get what I need from them. I will overcome their bad attitude. I got $100 tips sometimes and made money off the tables no one else would take. Bake some cup cakes or something too. If it had any potential of lasting a long time I would say run and definately don't bow down. Just make yourself too dang sweet to be mean too, even if your not. I wonder if there is some kind of botox that can make you smile like that guy on the male enhancement commercial.

Specializes in Hospice / Ambulatory Clinic.

There's worst things in the world to have an employer want you to be happy and smiling. If that's you only problem then I think you have it good. Just Smile. Barbara sang a whole song about it thats full of good advice.

Specializes in Hospice / Psych / RNAC.

Well; all I got to say is that if that offends you and has you pulling the I quit card me thinks you might get ready for a lot more I quit pulling cards. Your OP also has me thinking that you're saying more with your body language then you realize.

Instead of bracing against the advice why not embrace it...

Specializes in Neuro ICU/Trauma/Emergency.
I think you and I would get along well. I'm the exact same way. I keep up a nice face for my patients and family members, but my coworkers are my safe haven and my confidants. I can ask them for help, complain to them about the doctors, whine to them about the unfairness of my patient's condition, and they know they can do the same with me. Personally, I'd have it no other way. The nurse's station is a neutral zone. If you need help, you'll find it there. If you need to vent, you'll find it there too--only further in the back so none of the patients or families can hear you.

Perhaps your charge nurse is a cow. Maybe she's just a fan of splotchy white and black scrubs. Either way, it's really more about your perception than anything else because you're the one that has to live in your workplace, not any of us. However, because you asked, if I were you, I'd get another job or go back to school before I'd stay at a hospital where the management expected me to paste on a smile and pretend nothing was wrong. That's the same kind of management that will sell you down the river when the **** hits the fan.

Advice like this could ruin you. No offense, the military is guaranteed pay, yours is not. Also soldiernurse22, I'm guessing the 22 is for age. Therefore, you have much to learn. OP be cautious of who you solicit advice from!

Specializes in Acute Mental Health.

I think it's hard to be a newer nurse. It's hell and oftentimes there is little to smile about. However, a lack of a smile is super easy to fix. Fake it till you make it! I know this may sound wierd, but sometimes I notice I'm not as happy as I used to be. So......I force a smile and honestly, it makes me feel better. How can you smile and not feel good? Try it and see what happens. You're not sticking around there but it is good to get the experience.

Specializes in FNP, ONP.

i agree with ruby and the others who suggest you give some thought to how you are being perceived by others. most people should smile more. it isn't hard, isn't "being fake," and isn't an unreasonable suggestion on their part.

[h=3]1. smiling makes us attractive

[/h]we are drawn to people who smile. there is an attraction factor. we want to know a smiling person and figure out what is so good. frowns, scowls and grimaces all push people away -- but a smile draws them in (avoid these smile aging habits to keep your smile looking great).

[h=3]2. smiling changes our mood[/h]next time you are feeling down, try putting on a smile. there's a good chance you mood will change for the better. smiling can trick the body into helping you change your mood.

[h=3]3. smiling is contagious[/h]when someone is smiling they lighten up the room, change the moods of others, and make things happier. a smiling person brings happiness with them. smile lots and you will draw people to you.

[h=3]4. smiling relieves stress[/h]stress can really show up in our faces. smiling helps to prevent us from looking tired, worn down, and overwhelmed. when you are stressed, take time to put on a smile. the stress should be reduced and you'll be better able to take action.

[h=3]5. smiling boosts your immune system[/h]smiling helps the immune system to work better. when you smile, immune function improves possibly because you are more relaxed. prevent the flu and colds by smiling.

[h=3]6. smiling lowers your blood pressure[/h]when you smile, there is a measurable reduction in your blood pressure. give it a try if you have a blood pressure monitor at home. sit for a few minutes, take a reading. then smile for a minute and take another reading while still smiling. do you notice a difference?

[h=3]7. smiling releases endorphins, natural pain killers and serotonin[/h]studies have shown that smiling releases endorphins, natural pain killers, and serotonin. together these three make us feel good. smiling is a natural drug.

[h=3]8. smiling lifts the face and makes you look younger[/h]the muscles we use to smile lift the face, making a person appear younger. don't go for a face lift, just try smiling your way through the day -- you'll look younger and feel better.

[h=3]9. smiling makes you seem successful[/h]smiling people appear more confident, are more likely to be promoted, and more likely to be approached. put on a smile at meetings and appointments and people will react to you differently.

[h=3]10. smiling helps you stay positive

[/h]try this test: smile. now try to think of something negative without losing the smile. it's hard. when we smile our body is sending the rest of us a message that "life is good!" stay away from depression, stress and worry by smiling.

reasons to smile - health benefits of smiling

Specializes in LTC.

I just have to say it.

MOO!

I understand whats being said but nursing is a field to where each.person.brings their experiences and backgrounds to the table. Where one will.laugh, another may cry. Neither is right or wrong but in our own personal makeup. We r called upon to accept one another as valuable team.members caring for our patients.

Hmm. Well, if it were me, I'd play it thusly - give 'em exactly what they're asking for. Smile, and be more welcoming. Since being able to give excellent patient care doesn't seem to be what they want, back off on it - not to the point that your patients are at actual risk, but tone it down enough that you're getting the odd complaint now & then.

Then, call their bluff - let's see 'em fire you because you didn't "smile enough". Really, it's only going to do 2 things if you're terminated: 1) Make them look bad for having selected you for the position, 2) Give you a pretty good case for wrongful termination in court. Far better IMO than resigning.

In any case, sounds like you're gonna be boogieing in a month or two anyway - chalk it up to experience, be magnanimous & give 'em two weeks notice, and belt out a rousing rendition of "Eat My Shorts" when you're cleared for departure.

Best of luck with whatever course of action you choose to follow, and please let us know how it works out for you!

----- Dave

Specializes in CDI Supervisor; Formerly NICU.

If you're unhappy...quit. Simple as that. Never understood why people live in anguish over something as unimportant as a job.

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