I need to vent, everyone is mad at me for quitting the "superhospital"-long story

Nurses General Nursing

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Specializes in Education, Administration, Magnet.

I am so mad. I have always done what other people expected of me to do, and now I have finally have made my own decision. I have worked in a very nice small hospital as a tech for 2 years. I liked the people, my job and it was 3 minutes away from my house. But after I have graduated as a nurse in May, everybody told me that I will be better off going to the major big city hospital. They were all bragging to people that I am a nurse at this very known place. Don't get me wrong, the hospital is nice, but it is 2 hours away! But again, stupid me, went ahead and started an internship 2 hours away from home. I was miserable. I rather spend 4 hours a day playing with my daughter, then sitting in traffic. So many times, I have cried during the whole drive in the car (maybe pregnancy hormones-I am 11 weeks pregnant). Finally last night, as soon as I got off work I went to my old manager and asked her if I can come back. She was so happy that I showed up, and said I can start Monday. I was so excited, and I thought my dear husband and my family would be too, because they all knew how I felt from day one. But no, dear husband gets all upset about me leaving this great huge hospital. Everyone I know reacts the same way. I couldn't believe it, does anyone think about me? Nobody says to me that I did the right thing. But now, I really don't care. I was very happy at the small hospital where everyone knew each other by name, and I should have stayed there in the first place. Now I will have to deal with attitude at home. Sorry, I just needed to vent.

When they see how much happier you are, they will come around.

I've taken pay cuts because my sanity was more important to me than the job I was doing. Especially in medicine, if you're not happy with where you are, you will NOT do a good job and eventually you will kill someone. Good for you for recognizing what makes you happy.

Not to mention, being pregnant you really need to be closer to home.

Specializes in Education, Administration, Magnet.

Thank you Tazzy, as always you make me feel better. They don't even realize how much I will be saving in gas!

Specializes in ED, ICU, MS/MT, PCU, CM, House Sup, Frontline mgr.
I am so mad. I have always done what other people expected of me to do, and now I have finally have made my own decision. I have worked in a very nice small hospital as a tech for 2 years. I liked the people, my job and it was 3 minutes away from my house. But after I have graduated as a nurse in May, everybody told me that I will be better off going to the major big city hospital. They were all bragging to people that I am a nurse at this very known place. Don't get me wrong, the hospital is nice, but it is 2 hours away! But again, stupid me, went ahead and started an internship 2 hours away from home. I was miserable. I rather spend 4 hours a day playing with my daughter, then sitting in traffic. So many times, I have cried during the whole drive in the car (maybe pregnancy hormones-I am 11 weeks pregnant). Finally last night, as soon as I got off work I went to my old manager and asked her if I can come back. She was so happy that I showed up, and said I can start Monday. I was so excited, and I thought my dear husband and my family would be too, because they all knew how I felt from day one. But no, dear husband gets all upset about me leaving this great huge hospital. Everyone I know reacts the same way. I couldn't believe it, does anyone think about me? Nobody says to me that I did the right thing. But now, I really don't care. I was very happy at the small hospital where everyone knew each other by name, and I should have stayed there in the first place. Now I will have to deal with attitude at home. Sorry, I just needed to vent.

Is the pay different? Otherwise I cannot see why anyone is taking a personal interest in which hospital you worked (its name) unless you are running the place (CEO, VP, etc.)!

I think you did the right thing. None of the naysayers will be working your shifts! Besides, you a very fortunate to be at a good hospital. I am at a small rural town one and I do not plan to leave once I am a Registered Nurse! GL.

Specializes in Med/Surg.

(((hugs!!))) So sorry everyone is reacting that way! Hopefully your DH will get over it quick and give you the support you need. Just to play devil's advocate, he may have been put out about it if you just did all of this without giving him a heads up first. It would be a little upsetting for your spouse to come home and tell you "Oh, BTW, I quit my job today and will be starting a new one on Monday."

As for the rest of them: Who cares what they think! Not their life; therefore, none of their business. As long as you are happy about where you work, that is all that matters.

Best of luck!!:balloons::balloons:

Specializes in Education, Administration, Magnet.
(((hugs!!))) So sorry everyone is reacting that way! Hopefully your DH will get over it quick and give you the support you need. Just to play devil's advocate, he may have been put out about it if you just did all of this without giving him a heads up first. It would be a little upsetting for your spouse to come home and tell you "Oh, BTW, I quit my job today and will be starting a new one on Monday."

As for the rest of them: Who cares what they think! Not their life; therefore, none of their business. As long as you are happy about where you work, that is all that matters.

Best of luck!!:balloons::balloons:

You are right, but the thing is we have talked about it the night before after I broke down in tears. He told me to do what makes me happy. But today he couldn't believe that I have actually went through with this. He told me that he just made that comment because he blamed my crying on pregnancy hormones. And that I would be better in the morning. The pay is a little less (1.50 hr less), but I will be saving $100/week in gas.

By the way he is still not talking to me.

Ask him what the big deal is to him. With the money you save in gas you will be making more at the smaller place. And ask him what's more important to him: your happiness in your chosen profession or the prestige of telling people "My wife works at BigShotHospital."

Specializes in ED, ICU, PACU.

I am so sorry that you have to be going through this.

Maybe your husband isn't used to you doing things for yourself and is a bit shocked by it. You did mention that you are always putting others first; and, when you finally did stand up for what you know in your heart is best for you, others may not know how to handle it.

Just think, a 2 hour drive, while pregnant could mean a DVT--isn't that alone enough to make hubby realize that you made the right choice? Your happiness is important, as well as your physical and mental health, especially now. All were being jeopardized if you continued where you were. It might be time to tell hubby to get over it, deal with it and grow up! You made the wise choice.

Best wishes to you

Specializes in Cardiac, Derm, OB.

First things first, you are right 4 hrs a day with your daughter is more important than sitting in traffic. Of course that will be even more the case after the 2nd child is born, then you have 2 babies looking to mommy for love and time!

Secondly, you need to work where you want. Also, you can tell the DH to feel free to shag his butt right on up to the superhospital and get that job he cares so much about. :angryfire A loving husband should be concerned with his wife's and children's happiness.

Do what you need to for you and your children. They are the most important thing in life, period.

Who cares if he isn't "talking" to you. Turn it around, don't talk to him. And if you are like most of us wives you probably have a second FT job keeping your house and a 3rd FT job raising your kids. So leave all his Chores (dishes, laundry ect. for him to take care of). He will probably decide his wife is more important than the job.

Best of luck, Just be happy. Happiness is always the best revenge.

Specializes in Med/Surg, Ortho.

Noone should be upset with you. Unless they are going to drive the drive, work the shift, and take the heat its all your decision. I doubt the smaller hospital will be that much lower in pay but you will be saving at least the difference in gas and wear and tear on the car. And your kids will love you for making the right decision for THEM when they get older. It means you WILL be able to make the Tball games,, the dance recitals, take someone to piano lessons or pick someone up occasionally at school. You go with what makes your heart happy. They will get over it.

Specializes in Med-Surg, Wound Care.

No job is worth a two hour commute!! Enjoy the new position and the time found to be with your child.

Specializes in Peds Cardiology,Peds Neuro,Pedi ER,PICU, IV Jedi.

kiyatylese: YOU DID THE RIGHT THING!!!!!!

Happiness is one of the keys to doing great work. So glad you're back where you need to be, and where you can enjoy your family more. They'll come around.

Good for you for doing what you think is best - for you!!

vamedic4

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