I ignored my instincts...

Nurses General Nursing

Published

In work related situations I can be like iron and hold my ground very well, but in social situations I have a deep and serious phobia that I might put my foot in my mouth, for example company picnics or hanging out at kids' birthday parties with the other parents. :down:

I avoid social gatherings like the plague. It's bad enough I occasionally put my foot in my mouth online where there is a vague amount of anonymity, but face to face? :bag: I'd rather have a megacode in the middle of drilling a skull to put an IVC on a pregnant woman!

At work another nurse was organizing a kickball team for a 6 week recreational league. I was asked to play and then when I said I'd rather not, they promised that I wouldn't have to be sporty and they just needed bodies to cover in case of people's shift schedules. I agreed and had to work through the first day (whew!) but went to the second week. Needless to say I was awful, but I cheered for the good plays the other teammates performed.

The next day I was told by the person who invited me that my name was never on the roster and that I shouldn't have even showed up. She said their roster was full and that she'd put me on the sub list in case they needed me.

I was hurt. I was very very embarrassed. I told my work friend what happened and of course, they told everyone else. This morning when I was reporting off, the original organizer/nurse came up to me and yelled at me in front of everyone. I told her that I felt bad about being invited and then being told I shouldn't have come. I couldn't stay and talk further because I had to get home in time to let my husband go to work.

It's bothering me enough to post about it, and I feel like I did something wrong and now everyone at work will think I'm a bad person for showing up to something I "wasn't invited to". :no:

bsartor

126 Posts

Specializes in Neuro, Trauma, and Psych.

Are your coworkers still in high school? You were invited and graciously you went to show your support. You did nothing to be embarrassed of. I promise you normal people would have enjoyed seeing you outside work and great time would have been had by all. I am so sorry that your coworkers were hurtful. You say that you stand your ground at work but have social anxiety outside of work. It's hard but you just have to remind yourself that you are a bright, competent professional. Obviously you are caring and friendly. Believe in yourself and your great qualities and don't allow others to make you feel inferior! :) Its just my opinion, but I would bet money most people at your work have even given it a another thought.

SwansonRN

465 Posts

Your coworkers are absurd. I'm sorry they embarrassed you like that...and then yelled at you...during work...about kickball...I can't even. This is why gals like us have social anxiety. Feel better.

Specializes in Pain, critical care, administration, med.

They sound like babies. They need to grow up!

Specializes in Cardiology.

What sarakjp said. The whole situation sounds ridiculous.

Specializes in Med-Surg, Emergency, CEN.

Thanks guys. I'm not feeling as bad about it today. I'm definitely done with work parties, though.

~Melissa~

73 Posts

Specializes in Endocrinology, hopefully.

That's crazy! I think there are some discussions like that among my daughter and her friends... Of course, she's 5. Ha. Geez. I'm sorry they made you feel badly and even more sorry it was over something that was supposed to be "fun!" I am glad you're feeling better today, though. And you're right, I wouldn't associate with these folks outside of work ever again!

Specializes in Orthopedic, LTC, STR, Med-Surg, Tele.

OMG what a dumb thing to yell at someone about. Also, kickball, really? Maybe I'm a lone wolf but I'd rather run a 5K for a good cause. Earbuds in, leave 'em in the dust :headphone:

nrsang97, BSN, RN

2,602 Posts

Specializes in Neuro ICU and Med Surg.

Sounds like your co workers are a bunch of three year old kids. I would have just shook my head and walked away. Kickball really? Did you not play good enough or something? Jeez no reason to yell at you for coming. You were invited.

nurseprnRN, BSN, RN

1 Article; 5,114 Posts

Well, you didn't want to do it in the first place, so all's well that ends well, no harm-no foul, and all that. Keep calm and carry on.

Flare, ASN, BSN

4,431 Posts

Specializes in school nursing, ortho, trauma.

wow! you work with some real jerks. The normal thing that normal, nice, regular people would do would be to just be happy that you came out to play and social. Cripes, it's a thrown together unit kickball team, not a professional league.

Mulan

2,228 Posts

Just keep your head up and don't let it show that it bothers you.

That would be the last time I agreed to something like that.

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