Artificial feeding-Terri Schiavo

bugsbee · Mar 25, 2005

Who has used Terri for their own emtional gain? Not the husband but the parents who say they love her. It has been nothing but a circus with the courts involved in something they should not be. There are more important things for them to do. And yes its so very sad but the parents have stripped their daughter of all dignity and made a mockery of this case.

Kabin · Mar 25, 2005

I think it was Michael Shiavo's brother that said his brother had an undesireable personality and probably that's his worst enemy. But the US laws are there to protect any of us inspite of our shortcomings.

US laws assume a wife and husband have more intimate conversation and therefore know each other better than the parents. I think there little reason to believe otherwise.

Ms.RN · Mar 25, 2005

is it true that when a person is dying of dehydration, he or she can not feel the hunger or thirst but patient becomes unconscious and die peacefully?

caroladybelle, BSN, RN · Mar 25, 2005

Of course they do. Terri is what matters in this case.
However, I have been led to believe that the only proof that Terri does not want to be kept alive by any means is the words of Michael and his family. Has their been any further proof? (Sorry, midterm week here, so haven't been following it as closely)

The proof lies in her behavior. She developed an eating disorder in her late adolescence and early teens. This disorder was severe enough that she neglected her health and damaged her fertility. That neglect led to her current medical state.

Her desire for control over her body and for being the "ideal" weight is well documented by medical evidence, and has been attested to by family and friends.

And she developed this distorted ideal and need for control while in the care of her parents.

As such, it makes her ideas regarding the way that she would want to exist quite apparent.

It also indicates that her parents are probably not the best caregivers for her.

caroladybelle, BSN, RN · Mar 25, 2005

is it true that when a person is dying of dehydration, he or she can not feel the hunger or thirst but patient becomes unconscious and die peacefully?

as no one has come back from the dead to tell us, that would be quite hard to prove.

hypnotic_nurse · Mar 25, 2005

is it true that when a person is dying of dehydration, he or she can not feel the hunger or thirst but patient becomes unconscious and die peacefully?

i helped my best friend when her son was dying, at 21, of a brain stem tumor. he was very athletic before he got sick and he went 10 days without food or water (just a sponge to his lips or mouth every once in awhile) before he died...no decision was made to stop anything (he didn't have a tube) but he was simply no longer hungry.

he never complained about hunger or thirst and he had enough medication for pain. what little he did say was about the "people in white" he "saw" (in quotes because by then he was blind) in his room...his mom took great comfort from this. the last three to four days he didn't speak or make any other noises.

don't know if this answers your question, but this was my only experience.

begalli · Mar 25, 2005

The proof lies in her behavior. She developed an eating disorder in her late adolescence and early teens. This disorder was severe enough that she neglected her health and damaged her fertility. That neglect led to her current medical state.
Her desire for control over her body and for being the "ideal" weight is well documented by medical evidence, and has been attested to by family and friends.
And she developed this distorted ideal and need for control while in the care of her parents.
As such, it makes her ideas regarding the way that she would want to exist quite apparent.
It also indicates that her parents are probably not the best caregivers for her.

I agree wholeheartedly with this entire post.

I think that it could be safely concluded by Terri's own behavior before she suffered the brain damage, even though her thinking was probably very unhealthly due to her eating disorder, that she would not have wanted any of this.

Over the past couple of weeks I have also come to my own conclusion and belief that her parents are abusive and perhaps were abusive when she was younger. I feel what they are doing now is purely selfish and a way to control their daughter further. I could NEVER imagine doing what they are doing to their daughter...making her a complete public spectacle and the subject of disgusting politicians who are using her for their own gain.

I believe that Michael Shaivo is the only person looking out for Terri's own desires. I have a lot of respect for his "girlfriend" and hope that his children who MUST be deeply affected by this are fully supported psychologically.

Peachy720 · Mar 25, 2005

I agree wholeheartedly with this entire post.
I think that it could be safely concluded by Terri's own behavior before she suffered the brain damage, even though her thinking was probably very unhealthly due to her eating disorder, that she would not have wanted any of this.
Over the past couple of weeks I have also come to my own conclusion and belief that her parents are abusive and perhaps were abusive when she was younger. I feel what they are doing now is purely selfish and a way to control their daughter further. I could NEVER imagine doing what they are doing to their daughter...making her a complete public spectacle and the subject of disgusting politicians who are using her for their own gain.
I believe that Michael Shaivo is the only person looking out for Terri's own desires. I have a lot of respect for his "girlfriend" and hope that his children who MUST be deeply affected by this are fully supported psychologically.

I can agree with a lot of what Carol is saying.

But how can someone (Michael Shaivo) who refuses his wife Last Rites, light, a new wheelchair, and refers to her as "is the b*tch dead yet?" be someone who has Terri's best interest at heart? He is nothing more than a buzzard waiting for the signature on the death certificate so that he can re-marry.

allnurses Guide · Mar 25, 2005

I agree wholeheartedly with this entire post.
I think that it could be safely concluded by Terri's own behavior before she suffered the brain damage, even though her thinking was probably very unhealthly due to her eating disorder, that she would not have wanted any of this.
Over the past couple of weeks I have also come to my own conclusion and belief that her parents are abusive and perhaps were abusive when she was younger. I feel what they are doing now is purely selfish and a way to control their daughter further. I could NEVER imagine doing what they are doing to their daughter...making her a complete public spectacle and the subject of disgusting politicians who are using her for their own gain.
I believe that Michael Shaivo is the only person looking out for Terri's own desires. I have a lot of respect for his "girlfriend" and hope that his children who MUST be deeply affected by this are fully supported psychologically.

Amazing how people who don't even know these people can have 180 degree differences of opinion. Because I disagree with you 180 degrees.

I think her parents and siblings are among the most loving people I've ever seen interviewed. But then, I don't know them, never met them. Nor have I met Michael Schiavo.

Interesting . . .

steph

begalli · Mar 25, 2005

Amazing how people who don't even know these people can have 180 degree differences of opinion. Because I disagree with you 180 degrees.

It is interesting isn't it?

I firmly believe that actions speak volumes.

Every single thing that's been quoted as Michael Shaivo saying is heresay.

There are some websites out there saying that the parents would come into Terri's room earlier on and reposition her in her chair or put her up in her chair against the wishes of the nurses in the facility and move her to a window so that the protestors could "see" her.

Do I believe that?

Heck NO!

Do I believe that Michael Shaivo walked into her room and asked that infamous question, "is the bi*** dead yet?"

Heck NO!

What I can conclude is that Terri wanted control of her own life. Evidenced by her eating disorder. Usually with eating disorders there is a history of abuse or some type of control issue. I think that someone so concerned with their own body image would not want all of this attention.

I feel that what her parents are doing is going against Terri's wishes. Wishes that she probably did discuss with her husband. And it's NOT Michael Shaivo who's throwing Terri to the wolves, it's her parents.

caroladybelle, BSN, RN · Mar 26, 2005

I can agree with a lot of what Carol is saying.
But how can someone (Michael Shaivo) who refuses his wife Last Rites, light, a new wheelchair, and refers to her as "is the b*tch dead yet?" be someone who has Terri's best interest at heart? He is nothing more than a buzzard waiting for the signature on the death certificate so that he can re-marry.

There are no "Last rites"...there is the "Anointing of the Sick"....which given her situation has probably already been done many times.

How many "last rites" does one's Faith require?

Michael Schaivo could have easily divorced her and remarried at any time. He does not require her death for that.

And I will believe the b^&*h comment when I hear it from a non-biased source.

Do I like Schiavo.....no. But do I think that he has Terri's interests most in his heart... yes, more so than her parents. His statements appear more in line with the way Terri lived her life, than her parents' statements do.

NYERNURSE · Mar 26, 2005

Do I like Schiavo.....no. But do I think that he has Terri's interests most in his heart... yes, more so than her parents. His statements appear more in line with the way Terri lived her life, than her parents' statements do.

I feel the same way. Why else would he put himself through all of this? He could have washed his hands of Terri long ago and nobody would've faulted him for that. I admire him for sticking to his guns and seeing to it that Terri's wishes are respected until the end. It has been a long and tortuous road to take.

I refuse to judge him in a negative light for resuming his life outside the walls of the nursing home. I used to work in a NH caring for brain and spinal cord injured young and middle aged adults. It was not unusual at all for the healthy spouse to have girlfrinds/boyfriends while maintaining their marriage. They would still come and visit their partner, take care of them and take them out for day trips or weekend visits.....but they also went forward with their own lives. They are not evil sinners....they are people doing the best they can in a horrible situation. It's easy for those of us not in these predicaments to sit back and claim superior morals. :stone