When adults whine.... - page 4

by ~*Stargazer*~ 6,057 Views | 35 Comments

...I swear to God, I cannot handle it when children whine, but grown adults? Does this drive anyone else crazy? :uhoh3: I get that you're not feeling well, I get that you hurt, I get that you're scared, tired, hungry, etc.... Read More


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    There was a woman in our town who went to several business where I and family members/friends worked. After I described how awful, rude & obnoxious she was, 2 of my friends asked me to describe her - they said she was the one who came in and made everyone's day miserable. My niece knew her as well & she made her miserable too. These people have negative energy coming from their soul & usually aren't very mature I find.
    Yes it does drive me nuts.I usually smile & nod, ignore them & use distraction techniques. Show them that they aren't getting to you!
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    Quote from demylenated
    I really hope you are never the one in pain, the one who woke up paralyzed, the one who is scared, who has no clue what is going on.... the one who has never before been in the hospital, the one who medication does not seem to help... I hope you are never the one that wonders if they will ever feel normal again... the one who wonders if they will make it out of the hospital alive...

    *snip*

    I hope you never have to know what that kind of fear feels like, because I'm sure you will be whining.
    I think there's a big difference between complaining and whining. I've taken care of patients who weren't exactly chipper, who weren't trying to be brave, who were vocal about their pain and fear and unhappiness with circumstances.....but with whining you add that high pitched tone and drawn out nasal vowels to your speaking voice and it is like nails on a chalkboard for me.

    Not all sick patients whine, thankfully.

    And I wonder how many folks in this thread who hate whining have personally experienced the pain and fear you describe, or lived through it vicariously with loved ones. I'm guessing we're not as unenlightened and inexperienced as you seem to assume.
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    Quote from hiddencatRN
    I think there's a big difference between complaining and whining. I've taken care of patients who weren't exactly chipper, who weren't trying to be brave, who were vocal about their pain and fear and unhappiness with circumstances.....but with whining you add that high pitched tone and drawn out nasal vowels to your speaking voice and it is like nails on a chalkboard for me.

    Not all sick patients whine, thankfully.
    YES! Complaining/venting leads to processing and resolving (Not "solving," as in discovering a cure, but "resolving;" deciding where problem X lies in the scheme of things and whether it's worth tackling or not.)

    In my work with a non-profit for a specific illness, I see all kinds. Some of the whiniest have actually "Become" their illness: their identity is the disease. They are victims of X disease. Victims. Everything from an eyelash in the eye to constipation to yellowed toenails is a clear sign that the disease is progressing...they could be dead by the weekend. Let the whining begin! Facebook thread "has anyone ever had X symptom?" Ten minutes later, there are already 40 replies from people who not only experience the symptom, but they have it even worse! I can't count how many times I've gotten an email to call Mrs. Z as soon as possible because she's in a crisis and needs immediate referrals to local resources. So, I postpone spending time with Hubby and kids to help poor Mrs. Z, who has called the hotline 8 times in 3 days. A few minutes into the emergency consultation, I realize that this is the same lady who I called and gave this exact information to last year, and the year before! Yes, Mrs. Z has hunkered down in this rut with HER disease for years, whining to anyone within earshot. The free gas card went unused because she "can't stand that brand of gas," the grants for home and vehicle modification, respite care, and equipment only contain the information I wrote in for them because it's too much paperwork, it takes too long, the program only provides silver walkers when she had her heart set on a red one, the free cell phone with 250 free minutes per month doesn't have a qwerty keyboard so texting takes too long Oh, the humanity!

    And yes, I have the disease as well. My daughter passed away from it and I was a hospice pt for several months. (Fortunately, I was booted into palliative care when I passed my "expiration date!)
    .
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    Quote from demylenated
    I really hope you are never the one in pain, the one who woke up paralyzed, the one who is scared, who has no clue what is going on.... the one who has never before been in the hospital, the one who medication does not seem to help... I hope you are never the one that wonders if they will ever feel normal again... the one who wonders if they will make it out of the hospital alive...
    Here's the interesting thing about that, though ...

    I have never had one patient who was truly in a situation where they were "paralyzed" or otherwise had reason to fear for their life WHINE.

    The whiners are, without fail, the nonemergent patients and their families. The 23-year old otherwise healthy male who not only cannot seem to cope with URI symptoms, but has to bring along mommy & daddy to be miserable with him. The 30-year old female who cannot cope with one day's worth of diarrhea, and has to bring hubby along to wring his hands over her and come out to the desk every 5 minutes to say, "I think she needs something." Or the family of the stable patient who is being admitted but is currently alert, eating a sandwich and watching TV ... who think that The Death Stare or the Excessive Use of Nurse's Name will magically make the admitted bed appear, as they watch us struggle with a code and a combative head bleed patient at the same time.

    But if you want to attribute all whining to some existential crisis ... well, whatever works I guess.
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    I was listening to a whiney patient one day and accidently slammed my fingers in the door, she didn't even pause from her whining to ask if I was ok! I excused my self to go put ice on my hand. :uhoh21:
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    We have a couple prize ones who think that if they whine loud, hard and long enough we'll cave in and give them what they want just so they'll shut up (and/or quit scaring my 3 year old pt.)

    The proverbial squeaky wheel expecting to be greased...

    REALLY not a fan of that kind of behavior!

    cheers,
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