Would you marry a doctor?

Nurses General Nursing

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I thought being a nurse would be an excellent way to meet doctors to marry...but after a few weeks as a young nurse...I change my mind.

They work too much, they're arrogant, and they think they're God's gift to man kind.

Yea, the young ones are nice...but the older ones...forget it.

With the experiences you had working with doctors, would you marry one?

I agree with the above post. Some of the comments were lighthearted and funny while some were just downright mean.

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Unfortunately, I know several women who became nurses simply to find a husband.

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As an addendum, I'd never date anyone I worked with anyway.

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Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
i found it very surprising how judgmental and insulting folks are being in their responses...and we are nurses! we have been trained to be therapeutic, to be non-judgmental, to assess a situation before taking action.

here's my assessment: op seems quite young/immature, is new in nursing, and from her user id was probably born in 1986 making her about 23. she's honest enough to post her beliefs even if they're unpopular. she mentioned in a previous thread that some doc was hitting on her or something like that. come on people, do we really want to bash a young girl for being just that: young/immature?

based on all this i would guess op is probably infatuated with the whole idea of nursing and being with a doc (and there are so many girls like that), she probably was seeking input from other nurses on what they thought about the idea. i know how young girls get when they may be interested in some guy/situation, they ask around, "hey you think dating a guy that goes here would be cool?" and depending on what others say ("ew! no way" or "cool") they go for it or do not.

folks need to chill out, one girl going to nursing school to marry an md isn't going to end the world of nursing. frankly, anyone who would make it through nursing school just for that goal deserves some respect, talk about dedication to a cause (jk).

i don't think folks should judge other people's reasons for making life choices. we all have our reason for getting into nursing and not everyone did it for the honor: "to save lives." folks do it: "to pay the bills," "to go to crna school," "to get my parents off my back" (got that from philippino friend) , "i couldn't hack med school,"... the list goes on.

now to answer op's question: i don't know that i can marry one. my dad's one and we had our good and bad days. if i fall in love with one and he is a good man then we could make it work. one just never knows but i doubt if i would go out and pick one if i had a choice between an md and some other profession.

we're trained to be nonjudgemental at work -- here on this board, we're free to be as judgemental as we like, and in my humble opinion, somone who posts something as outrageous as the op's post is asking for it. there's a big difference between going to school to pay the bills and going to school to find a husband. sorry -- i've have lots of respect for the first and absolutely no respect for the second.

your mileage may vary.

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Specializes in Gerontology.

Hell, I'm 45 and still an old maid. I'll marry anything that's male and breathing!

Hmm - I just described my cat. I'll let you all know when the wedding is so you can send me gifts! LOL

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Wish I could donate my husband Pepper. My cats are a LOT better to live with, and I don't fantasize about murdering them. Maybe you are truly blessed. A husband can be the biggest mistake of a life and impossible to get free of. But that is another story.

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Specializes in LTC, med-surg..

One day the OP will probably realize that the 'idea' of marrying a doctor was just a passing fantasy and kind of a silly one. I remember watching some 'reality' show on tv-"The Bachelorette," I think- and the women/girls on the show were ooh-ing and ahh-ing and all starry-eyed and this one girl said, "OMG, he's a DOCTOR!" I wanted to throw up.

Doctors belch and fart and pick their noses just like anyone else. They aren't superhuman and being married to one does not mean a perpetual honeymoon. More than likely, a lot of them are probably demanding, impatient and hard to deal with. This is not a personal attack on doctors, but a lot of doctors have a certain personality and that is why they were able to make it through medical school. Most certainly, by the time they are out of medical school they either have families started or, if they are looking to start a family, they don't want to play the giddy school-girl(or boy) games.

But that is a part of growing up, I guess. I know that before I got in a relationship I was totally unprepared for and out of touch with the reality of being married. It was kind of a bummer once I realized what I was into.

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Specializes in ER,ICU.

I really had a chuckle reading all the responses. I was a nurse for 30+ years ( now retired). I NEVER wanted anything to do with the docs I worked with ...until....I worked with a doc in the ER who I initially did not like. I thought him arrogant and distant at times and too much the chatty-cathy at other times. He always had people gathered around him telling jokes and stories when I (the charge nurse) just wanted him to move meat! During a rather long drawn-out code where the patient kept trying to die and we wouldn't let him, this doc asked the patient's wife what she wanted us to do as his chances for recovery were slim to none. We could keep on bringing him back with electricity and drugs but he likely would not recover. She gave her consent to not continue coding the patient. The doc walked over to the patient, laid his hand on the patient's chest and said Mr. B it's OK to rest. You have worked hard, your wife is here with you and it is OK to let go. The patient coded within minutes and we let him go with his wife holding his hand. I had to leave the room. I couldn't stop crying for 20 minutes. I was outside trying to get it together when this doc came out and said one of my nurses told me I made you cry. I told him in all the years I had been doing codes in the ER he was the first I had ever heard talk to the patient and tell him it was OK to rest. To allow someone to die with dignity, WOW I was so impressed. We later started seeing each other and eventually married. (I was 53 at the time) We worked together some after we were married but it was always difficult because the people around us were not comfortable with us working together in the same ER. ( I'm cleaning this up because it got ugly for awhile). So to echo some of the rest of you my first response would have been no and h..l no but after getting to know this very HUMAN being (no god like qualities, just a very intellegent, caring, multitalented guy) I would have to change that answer. We have both been through some pretty tough times and are each others best friends and soul mates. So, sometimes it works out. You meet the most unlikely people in the most unlikely places.

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^Wow now that a love story I would like to have!:yeah::yeah::yeah::redbeathe:yeah:

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Specializes in ICU, Surgical Services.
we're trained to be nonjudgemental at work -- here on this board, we're free to be as judgemental as we like, and in my humble opinion, somone who posts something as outrageous as the op's post is asking for it. there's a big difference between going to school to pay the bills and going to school to find a husband. sorry -- i've have lots of respect for the first and absolutely no respect for the second.

your mileage may vary.

your opinion is noted and i respect your right to disagree. thank you.

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Specializes in Operating Room.

RE: the original question.

Why would I wan't to do that to myself? I admit, I don't get the whole marriage thing anyway. But, if you are going to get married, a doctor is the last person I'd choose. Many of them have affairs, and they're never home.

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Specializes in psychiatric nursing, med/surg adult care.
I found it very surprising how judgmental and insulting folks are being in their responses...and we are NURSES! WE have been trained to be THERAPEUTIC, to be NON-JUDGMENTAL, to ASSESS a situation before taking action.

Here's my assessment: OP seems quite young/immature, is new in nursing, and from her user ID was probably born in 1986 making her about 23. She's honest enough to post her beliefs even if they're unpopular. She mentioned in a previous thread that some doc was hitting on her or something like that. Come on people, do we really want to bash a young girl for being just that: young/immature?

Based on all this I would guess OP is probably infatuated with the whole idea of nursing and being with a doc (and there are so many girls like that), she probably was seeking input from other nurses on what they thought about the idea. I know how young girls get when they may be interested in some guy/situation, they ask around, "hey you think dating a guy that goes here would be cool?" and depending on what others say ("ew! no way" or "cool") they go for it or do not.

Folks need to chill out, one girl going to nursing school to marry an MD isn't going to end the world of nursing. Frankly, anyone who would make it through nursing school just for that goal deserves some respect, talk about dedication to a cause (jk).

I don't think folks should judge other people's reasons for making life choices. We all have our reason for getting into nursing and not everyone did it for the honor: "to save lives." Folks do it: "To pay the bills," "to go to CRNA school," "to get my parents off my back" (got that from Philippino friend) , "I couldn't hack med school,"... the list goes on.

NOW to answer OP's question: I don't know that I can marry one. My dad's one and we had our good and bad days. If I fall in love with one and he is a good man then we could make it work. One just never knows but I doubt if I would go out and pick one if I had a choice between an MD and some other profession.

In a less popular place in Southeast Asia where I grew up, it is a common dream for young girls to be a nurse and hope to marry a doctor. There is that notion that nurses are meant for doctors (if not engineers). Male dominance in a community like ours somehow lead mothers to unknowingly influence their daughters to seek refuge to the nursing profession. Being a nurse is one of the best ways to uplift the "status" of women as they get respected and admired with what they do. Same as how it was during the earlier days of nursing history.

I didn't dream of marrying a doctor because when I was younger, I never dream of marrying anyone :D. But at age 23, my first boyfriend was a medical resident 5 years my senior. By age 26, after 3 years in quite smooth-sailing relationship, I became his fiancee. Now his ex :D. 3 months prior to the big day, I turned him down. Reason: 3rd party. No regrets because we are friends now.

If I would marry a doctor? Why not? Beyond his title, a doctor is a person too, and I would want to marry that person in him with all his strengths and flaws; yes, that awful man who loves to display his stethoscope because he thinks he's cute with his Littmann. ;)

But until I say "I do", I can never be sure if I really would. Besides, I realized now that a Navy officer is way hotter and sexier in white! :D

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