at my wits end

[extraordinary067]

I am a new grad about 3 mths into my ICU internship and feel like i want to quit. I love being a nurse and love the icu, but some of the nurses i work with are so volitile. i really feel like i am at my wits end. there are some other newbies too that i found out are having similar problems as me and have reported it to management. i was called in also and asked how my experience has been thus far. i had to be honest. it is a very poor, non collaborative work environment. there are nurses who completely ingore you when you have a question and that bad mouth you behind your back, call you stupid, etc. i am very fortunate to not have a temper, bc if i did i would be fired by now. most of the nurses are great but there are a few that make everyone elses day difficut (even some of the seasoned nurses). my preceptor who is amazing and has been an icu nurse for 23 yrs even told management something needs to be done bc they are going to continue to loose good people including herself.

over the past few wks i have really thought if somewhre else would be a better fit for me. i really hate that i want to leave. i told myself i would give it at least a year but i just don't know. my thing is is that i finished the critical care cirriculum and am about 3/4 the way through my preceptorship. i feel like if i look for work elsewhere it will look bad that i am wanting to leave my current job after only 3mths. also, what would i say was my reason for leaving...that wouldn't make me look bad.

[nyclizzo]

When I first applied for a job as an RN, I told the nurse recruiter how I wanted to get into CCU/ICU, and she absolutly talked me out of it. She said that it is such a stressful environment as is, and a new graduate would go crazy there. Or maybe the nurses are jealous that you came on the floor as a new graduate...who knows!!

Maybe starting on a regular med surg floor would've been an easier transition...The recruiter also told me about a few nurses that started in ICU, Maternity and such and have come back to her b/c they weren't ready. You have to be honest with your management and you shouldn't stress yourself out, especially as a new nurse!!!!!

[loricatus]

If you leave now you would probably have to start all over again as a new grad. This is what happened to me with my first position out of school. I left for the exact same reasons you are talking about. But, you have something many of use didn't have-a supportive preceptor. Take full advantage of that because she will be standing up for you when you are on your own. She already considers you a good nurse, not worth losing. This will give you an advantage when you are on your own. It might be worth trying to stick it out a year and then look for a new position as an experienced nurse. In the meantime, don't worry what those idiots say or do to you, management has already been informed about them and they certainly lack credibility. Also, you will find a good share of this type anyplace you go; so, trying to handle it while you have support from a seasoned, well-respected nurse might be the best way prepare you for a future elsewhere.

[abreezies]

:uhoh21: isn't this just the way it goes sometimes. i just get so sick when i hear of these "senior nurses" demeaning the "new grads". i vow to never forget what it is like to be a grad nurse, and if i ever get short with a new grad once i am a senior nurse, i hope that god will put me in my place and i will apologize. they were once new nurses too. they must forget how it is to have finally graduated and be so excited to do what we dream to do, and then be put down and shut out by the very people we should be looking up to. yeah they have worked longer than us, and they know more, but we are still people and we desire to have the knowledge that they do. i love the nurses that find gratification in helping us become better nursed by nicely showing us the ropes. these nurses "in my opinion " are true nurses and these are the ones i try to go to and look up to. it is unfortunate, but it happens everywhere.

[Hoozdo, ADN]

I had very similar problems in my first year as a new grad in the ICU. I didn't have a regular preceptor though :angryfire It was whoever :trout:

I tried to stick it out a year, but left after 11 months. I am much happier at a different hospital in an ICU that is supportive. I love my coworkers and we are good at teamwork.

If I were you, see how you feel after a year. If you want to leave......the world is at your feet.

[NJNursing, ASN, RN]

I felt this way starting in Maternity right after being a new grad. However they were nice to my face and back stabbing behind my back which sucked even more because I had that false sense of security. It really ruined my first experience as a wide-eyed grad. I went to an ortho-med/surg floor which having moved to a brand new wing we're now ortho-neuro and about to go live with telemetry in about a month, so really the gain in the end has been mine. I also switched from days to nights and I'm finding it's more like a family with great team work and people that I'm happy to call friends.

[stressgal, RN]

I agree that you may find "these kind' of coworkers anywhere. It is just plain tough being the new person, and new to all of the tasks you have to accomplish. I was told by a nursing instructor to "positively not begin in the ICU because the nurses will not respect you." Well, I did any way. And I didn't get any respect at first, but I hadn't earned it yet either. By asking lots of well thought out questions, doing research on my own, and bringing up my short comings and having the ability to laugh at myself I have thrived in the unit. In the past 11 months I have developed some great relationships wth the "senior" RN's and have gained their respect. As a matter of fact, one nurse I didn't think I would want to work with much is now one of my favorite coworkers. It's all about growing as a person and professional nurse. There are some units that are miserable places to work, don't get me wrong. You are the only one who knows if you can learn from and/or make this situation work for you. I wish you the best!

[blueberrybon]

I hope this last week has been better for you. I hope that whatever you decide to do ends up being the right decision. Of course, no matter what you decide to do, you can always MAKE it work. That's the wonderful thing about being human. We can make things work, no matter what the situation is.

Blue

[willdgate]

From someone with a year experience and changing jobs, the grass is never greener on the other side, but it can be a bit better, if you just can't take it