I have been a nurse forever...I also suffer from depression which has been MUCH worse since our unit got a new manager (a little over a year ago). I was suspended last year for a day without pay because apparently she told me to come to her office and I didn't hear/process the request...just an example. Over the year I have been feeling more and more overwhelmed...there are only 2 nurses to cover ICU/Tele...(small hospital); myself and the former manager, 2 for 14 shifts and all but one LPN on med/surg are all PRN staff. (We had 4 ICU nurses but one transfered to surgery a year ago and another was fired by this manager...it was needed). That leaves the only full time RNs (the 2 ICU/Tele nurses) to cover med/surg too. Anyway I have been having trouble concentrating and getting my charting done...I'm the one that EVERYONE comes to to answer their questions and help solve their problems. Sorry this is so long...
I even had a sleep study done this summer to see if a CPAP would help me to sleep (manager knows all this cause I had asked if she could come in at 0600 the day of my test so I could leave on time to get to the test...she didn't show until 0800!).
Any way end of September after having my schedule switched around all summer so others could take vacations and orienting every new staff on the night shift (LPN that quit 2 hrs b-4 shift started, RN that got moved to day shift before her orientation was even done, a new grad LPN that is basically dangerous, and had just started the 4th (RN) when I called in and the 5th has started since I left) and working short because our ward clerk had an MI...I went to my Dr. sick with a cold and sobbing because I couldn't take it anymore-he told me to call in sick that week and my therapist told me to call in the next Monday and Tuesday until I could see the Psychiatrist...my manager called me and told me that I had to meet with her and the Clinical administator where I received a write up for my overtime and for crying at work...she said that she gets multiple phone calls every night I work about me crying or being hysterical and the was totally PO'd when I gave her the order for a 30 day LOA. She said that I was causing them hardship and that I would have to be replaced and there probably not be a position when I returned from the LOA that they needed to check to see if it was 'real' and would not give me the family leave papers to fill out. What do you all think?
Another update...since I "resigned"... NOT(!). I have not heard a word from the hospital, found out last Wed. that the position I requested to transfer to is no longer posted...so I was not even given a chance to explain why I wanted the position! They screwed up there because I could have also been used for education resource because I was the only one, it seems, that knew the monitors, the IV pumps, and the call system. The really sad thing is, I'm sure my former boss was/is happy that she finally got rid of me but, when I get me that lawyer...she has no clue that her boss will make it all be her fault and she will get the fall out from the whole thing! giggle,giggle...bad nurse,er former nurse! So far I am not missing it at all...I do plan to keep up with what's happening in the field so when I'm ready (if ever) to go back, I can.
I have a temporary job at a fullfillment facility...busy this time of year. Standing 5-8 hours a day, making and packing boxes...definately different...but it is giving me a new out look on life outside a hospital...good learning experience.
Well I am appealing the unemployment denial with a lawyer, have filed a discrimination lawsuit with the state, and have 2 more lawyers standing by for worker's compensation and one for the facilities refusal to let me sign FLMA papers. Plus I had to sic the government on them to get COBRA (finally got the info 60 days! after my employment/coverage ended). In some ways I am doing better emotionally--being away from the manager, and life and death decisions...but it isn't easy having no income except for an occasional temporary job, and no insurance...or money to pay for insurance. I may have to go back into nursing but not acute care!
Specializes in Alzheimer's, Geriatrics, Chem. Dep..
Thanks to all that responded...I have decided (at least for now) to quit nursing...I don't know how to do anything else and have no other source of income...but I have to have Faith and it will all be ok...right?
Diploma, don't make any major decisions right now - you are depressed emotionally and CHEMICALLY - I have been out of work since Oct 03 and have not "decided" to leave nursing - have crawled back to functioning ok SLOW-w-w-ly... still not sure if I want to go back to nursing but at least keep your RN license on inactive status.
You may be able to get ST, LT, or SS disability, keep records of time lost and doctors' appts, and tell them you need documentation of your ability/lack of ability to work...
diploma '81
ps - don't take on HER guilt and overwhelm. She will have to find her OWN solution - and it isn't your problem right this minute. K? NO GUILT!
Well I am appealing the unemployment denial with a lawyer have filed a discrimination lawsuit with the state, and have 2 more lawyers standing by for worker's compensation and one for the facilities refusal to let me sign FLMA papers. Plus I had to sic the government on them to get COBRA (finally got the info 60 days! after my employment/coverage ended). In some ways I am doing better emotionally--being away from the manager, and life and death decisions...but it isn't easy having no income except for an occasional temporary job, and no insurance...or money to pay for insurance. I may have to go back into nursing but not acute care![/quote']
Wow - you sound like a person who's taken on power like a duck to water. Your former place of employment is extremely dysfunctional - the turnover and quality of staff speaks for itself. It sounds like a good thing that you got to work in a box factory for awhile - it gave you the time to prepare yourself emotionally for the legal wrangling ahead. I hope that you can find a job in nursing that provides you with the financial security you need - remember, you're the sane person here..your former environment was poisonous to a lot of employees who left before you. Your "self" is getting the break you deserved.
Specializes in Alzheimer's, Geriatrics, Chem. Dep..
Well I am appealing the unemployment denial with a lawyer have filed a discrimination lawsuit with the state, and have 2 more lawyers standing by for worker's compensation and one for the facilities refusal to let me sign FLMA papers. Plus I had to sic the government on them to get COBRA (finally got the info 60 days! after my employment/coverage ended). In some ways I am doing better emotionally--being away from the manager, and life and death decisions...but it isn't easy having no income except for an occasional temporary job, and no insurance...or money to pay for insurance. I may have to go back into nursing but not acute care![/quote']
AND I can see I am a day late and a dollar short, sorry for the belated advice, looks like you are on top of it!
It's a bad situation, but you DID resign, unfortunately. You said you had decided to "quit nursing." At that point you resigned. then as far as the transfer, I can understand why they would not hire someone who has had a lot of sick time in the past year. Once you resign they will use that advantage as much as they can.
Specializes in Critical Care, Pediatrics, Geriatrics.
I'm giving you my honest advice (I also have suffered from depression although, affecting many jobs I have held in the past...although not nursing as I am newly graduated). Take it for what it's worth.
It seems that this facility was treating you inappropriately, and you were offering too much of yourself..which probably played a large part into contributing to your depression. The situation and lack of support became so overwhelming for you that you and your physician decided that a leave of absence was in order. Then after you took action to help yourself, this facility again took advantage of that situation and had their best interest, not yours, in mind. Why would you want to return to that facility? It is obvious that the problem is not simply with your NM, but with the chain of command as well. Although, I feel you were definitely treated unfairly from beginning to end of this situation and yes there are legal actions you can take.....does the end justify the means? (or however that saying goes) Is it worth it? Is it contributing to your well being?
I feel your time and efforts and energy, which is very slim in supply for someone who is in a depressive state, worth spending on a facility that has proven that they will not take care of you or what's best for you. Move on. I suggest, before throwing nursing away, finding another avenue of nursing all together. Maybe what you need is a very long break until the bitter taste this facility has left with you is a distant memory. But I would definitely not go back to this facility, nor continue to focus my energy on recourse. It is important to take care of you, do what's good for you, move on to things that give you a sense of success and accomplishment, not defeat, anger, resentment, or guilt. That will only feed your depression. The financial and emotional toll of taking legal action against this facility, although they may deserve it, may be too harmful to you at this moment than just moving on to greener pastures.
That's my advice for all it's worth. I know its easier said than done. I wish you the very best and will pray for your peace and mental/emotional well being.
Diploma'82
59 Posts
Another update...since I "resigned"... NOT(!). I have not heard a word from the hospital, found out last Wed. that the position I requested to transfer to is no longer posted...so I was not even given a chance to explain why I wanted the position! They screwed up there because I could have also been used for education resource because I was the only one, it seems, that knew the monitors, the IV pumps, and the call system. The really sad thing is, I'm sure my former boss was/is happy that she finally got rid of me but, when I get me that lawyer...she has no clue that her boss will make it all be her fault and she will get the fall out from the whole thing! giggle,giggle...bad nurse,er former nurse! So far I am not missing it at all...I do plan to keep up with what's happening in the field so when I'm ready (if ever) to go back, I can.
I have a temporary job at a fullfillment facility...busy this time of year. Standing 5-8 hours a day, making and packing boxes...definately different...but it is giving me a new out look on life outside a hospital...good learning experience.