What do you think?

document everything.

fill out the papers.

take the leave...You need to look out for yourself right now. You cannot possibly help anyone else until you help yourself.

I think it's time for a change of venue for you.

The last thing you need is to be questioned about a doctor-ordered stint of time off.

It's a cliche, but...life is too short...to be this miserable!

You are a good nurse...one that is sought out for opinions and direction...one that they trust to train new employees. You have earned that, and should be able to demand some respect for what you need to take care of yourself.

Keep the faith...in yourself...and follow through with what you know is right for you.

all-in-all you sound stressed and that's probably what's causing your depression to worsen. just an idea but have you ever thought about doing home health? maybe you could get away from the politics of floor nursing for awhile. some nurses really love it, so i hear?

Hello

I am very sorry your expiriencing such a horrible time professionally.

I am not sure why you are requesting a leave of abscence and not going on diability for emotional and mental health.

Did you ask your MD or Psychiatrist if they would consider doing this ?

That way you can not be fired for this unless it is quite extended and it sure sounds quite legitimite.

Your in my thought and finally this place and that RN are not worth your tears and angst -- believe that -- give yourself a time to regroup and

start looking for ANYTHING that will not affect your emotional serenity.

MARC

As I understand it, you have not been back to work since your visit to your doctor. Regardless of the number of days you have missed, that amounts to a single call-out occurrence, and when you have your LOA papers filled out by your physician, they should be back-dated to indicate that your LOA was medically necessary as of that date.

If you are eligible for FMLA, your employer must hold your job, or a similar job for 12 weeks, while continuing to provide your benefits at the same cost that you paid when you were working. (For example, if you paid $100/pay period for insurance, that same rate applies during your leave.) You must complete the paperwork required by your employer, including physician documentation. When you are ready to return to work, your employer may require you to give 2 weeks notice of your intent to return to work. (This allows your supervisor to make the necessary scheduling adjustments in advance.) If you do not return to work in a benefits-eligible position at the end of your leave, your employer may, by law, bill you for the cost of benefits provided during your leave.

Generally speaking, employees qualify for FMLA if they have been employed for more than 1 year, work at a site with 50 or more employees, have worked 1000+ hours in the previous 12 month period, and have not already used their 12 week/year leave. FMLA also allows employees to use leave time in "installments", such as taking pre-arranged day(s) off work to lighten their work schedules, make medical appointments, etc. at their doctor's recommendation, as long as the total time off does not exceed 12 weeks/year.

Your Human Resources department should have a written policy and procedure outllining your responsibilities and rights under FMLA. Ask HR to mail you a copy of the policy, and call them to discuss it if there is anything you don't understand. There are also plenty of websites that discuss this legislation, and your local senator or congressman's office can also assist you in insuring that your rights are protected.

I am sorry for your shabby treatment by your manager. It is clear that she is dumping on you, which is a shame, because she has now lost her most reliable employee. Please take good care of yourself.

I think unfortunately you are too kind and have put up with too much, for too long. You have let them take advantage of you. They need you worse than you need them - even though they certainly don't act like it.

You need to look at the situation as if you're interviewing them as an employer - are they meeting your standards? No! So you need to fire them. Resign before they try to run you out. It will look better to future employers if you leave on your terms. And you will feel better knowing you took control of the situation, instead of letting them decide your fate.

Right now you're letting them have all the power and run your life. They are using your employment with them to threaten and control you, and it seems like it's taken away your strength and self-worth. What's the worst that could happen if you leave? You have to go out and find a new job? Good - there are many other jobs to chose from, and a greater chance of being treated well and respected - better than the chance you have currently. Even if you live in a small community without many hospitals there is home health, clinics, doc's offices, school nursing, insurance companies, pharm/med equip sales, even answering nurse hotlines from your own home.

I was working on a unit that made me feel miserable and disrespected. I met with an advisor and said that if I didn't get transferred somewhere else, I couldn't be a nurse anymore, because it was ruining my life. It took 3 months, but I now work on a different unit and my life has been turned around. I'm so much happier now!

Perhaps you're quite used to where you work and exploring opportunities seems out of your comfort zone. But is that any worse than what you're experiencing now? It doesn't get any worse than the situation you're in.

Your current work environment is abusive and you need to protect yourself and find a Plan B. First take some time off to heal and build yourself up, then explore other opportunites and move on. Best of luck to you.

Thanks to all that responded...I have decided (at least for now) to quit nursing...I don't know how to do anything else and have no other source of income...but I have to have Faith and it will all be ok...right?

At the very least you need to look for another facility or at least another unit. This is not a healthy place for you. Doesn't sound like it's healthy for anyone. It saddens me to hear that you've decided to quit nursing, but then maybe that's the best thing for you, to regain your health.

Your opinion about quitting nursing may change after you've had time to rest, but whatever you decide, best wishes to you.

Wanted to give an update on my situation...I took the leave and during that time I did decide to get off night shift and quit nursing for a while. Now get this...there has been posted for some time a 1/2 time position for a material Managememt Clerk...I'm thinking: less/different type of stress; will keep me on the insurance and I can get another part time job somewhere else. So I e-mailed the manager of the department on 17 Oct telling her that I was interested, she in turn forewarded it to Human Resourses (new guy couldn't remember his name) and also to HER boss . On 30 Oct I turned in a transer request form with a cover letter stating:

"During my leave of absence I have given it much thought and I have chosen to focus on improving my health (diabetes and depression). In my decision I have chosen to get off the njght shift and to quit nursing for a while. Therefore I will not be returning to ****** in the cpacity as a nurse, as at this time in my life I consider second floor to be a hostile work environment for me. I am applying for a transfer to the 0.5 position as Material managment Clerk, (if this position is still open)."

PS I see my Dr. tomorrow, 31 October, and should receive my release to work at that time.

I attached the transfer sheet and hand delivered it to human resources but the dude wasn't there.

Next day saw my Dr., he told me that I resigned and I said "No I applied for a transfer to another department" I again hand delivered the release to HR and again the dude was not there so I gave it to his 'assistant'...later that day since I hadn't heard anything I e-mailed the HR person and a copy to the Administrative clinical director (she was the other person besides my boss in the meeting when this all started ). About an hour later I got an e-mail from the ACD stating that I had resigned on 10-30-06 and that she thought I was over qualified for the position I requested to transfer too (well duh! that's why I want the position). And said that I had filled out the appropriate paperwork for the transfer. That was it...I no longer have a job because they resigned me. Its been a week and I have heard nothing from the hospital about the transfer, about cobra--anything. 1 Nov I applied for medical assist and food stamps because I used up all of my sick and vacation time on the leave.

I know the CEO from nursing school...should I bring this emotional, mental, financial distress that has been thrown at me for being diabetic and depressed to her attention?

Wanted to give an update on my situation...I took the leave and during that time I did decide to get off night shift and quit nursing for a while. Now get this...there has been posted for some time a 1/2 time position for a material Managememt Clerk...I'm thinking: less/different type of stress; will keep me on the insurance and I can get another part time job somewhere else. So I e-mailed the manager of the department on 17 Oct telling her that I was interested, she in turn forewarded it to Human Resourses (new guy couldn't remember his name) and also to HER boss . On 30 Oct I turned in a transer request form with a cover letter stating:

"During my leave of absence I have given it much thought and I have chosen to focus on improving my health (diabetes and depression). In my decision I have chosen to get off the njght shift and to quit nursing for a while. Therefore I will not be returning to Illini in the cpacity as a nurse, as at this time in my life I consider second floor to be a hostile work environment for me. I am applying for a transfer to the 0.5 position as Material managment Clerk, (if this position is still open)."

PS I see my Dr. tomorrow, 31 October, and should receive my release to work at that time.

I attached the transfer sheet and hand delivered it to human resources but the dude wasn't there.

Next day saw my Dr., he told me that I resigned and I said "No I applied for a transfer to another department" I again hand delivered the release to HR and again the dude was not there so I gave it to his 'assistant'...later that day since I hadn't heard anything I e-mailed the HR person and a copy to the Administrative clinical director (she was the other person besides my boss in the meeting when this all started ). About an hour later I got an e-mail from the ACD stating that I had resigned on 10-30-06 and that she thought I was over qualified for the position I requested to transfer too (well duh! that's why I want the position). And said that I had filled out the appropriate paperwork for the transfer. That was it...I no longer have a job because they resigned me. Its been a week and I have heard nothing from the hospital about the transfer, about cobra--anything. 1 Nov I applied for medical assist and food stamps because I used up all of my sick and vacation time on the leave.

I know the CEO from nursing school...should I bring this emotional, mental, financial distress that has been thrown at me for being diabetic and depressed to her attention?

Yes, bring it to her attention. Get a laywer. Call the local TV station/ newspaper. Notify the Better Business Bureau. Report it to who ever regulates nondiscrimatory hiring/ firing practices. Picket the hosptal. And what ever else you, your family, your friends can think of.

I don't know if any of these suggestions will get you "unresigned" and get you a job, but I do know that taking some action will make you feel much better. You are not a victim - so don't act like one. Do not "go quietly into the night". In a case like this, if you MUST go, go kicking and screaming and take some of those midlevel manager pinheads with you.

Good luck! :angryfire :angryfire :angryfire

Thanks, I didn't think about it, posting the hospital name, I was quoting my letter. Same state, different city.

Does anyone out there know of a lawyer that does pro-bono work cause I'm making zilch at this time.

Another update...since I "resigned"... NOT(!). I have not heard a word from the hospital, found out last Wed. that the position I requested to transfer to is no longer posted...so I was not even given a chance to explain why I wanted the position! They screwed up there because I could have also been used for education resource because I was the only one, it seems, that knew the monitors, the IV pumps, and the call system. The really sad thing is, I'm sure my former boss was/is happy that she finally got rid of me but, when I get me that lawyer...she has no clue that her boss will make it all be her fault and she will get the fall out from the whole thing! giggle,giggle...bad nurse,er former nurse! So far I am not missing it at all...I do plan to keep up with what's happening in the field so when I'm ready (if ever) to go back, I can.

I have a temporary job at a fullfillment facility...busy this time of year. Standing 5-8 hours a day, making and packing boxes...definately different...but it is giving me a new out look on life outside a hospital...good learning experience.