What would you do?


So I need to ask for advice in regards to a major life decision....

I went to nursing school in Kansas City, MO. I lived in Sacramento, CA before school and it had horrendous waiting lists and lotteries and a high tuition, so off to KCMO I went. I finished school and moved back to Cali as soon as I could. I passed NCLEX, received not only my license in MO, but also in CA. I have applied to 250 jobs with a radius from the bay to Auburn to Stockton to Redding. I graduated top of my class and even received an award at graduation. I speak Spanish and have a wide variety of experience in the medical field. NO RESPONSES in California-I'm sure most people are experiencing the same thing. So I have a long long time boyfriend that lives in Sacramento along with his two children (teenagers). I wanted to be a nurse in Ca sooo bad it hurts, but I don't see it happening soon. I called my old job up in Kansas City and asked if they would hire me as a nurse. They said, "Are you serious? Heck yeah!" The pay is not the best, but it is good, benefits are good, and they reimburse tuition (want to work on BSN). I am so miserable working as a receptionist and hearing people call the MA a nurse along with the rejection letters. Sorry for the word vomit, but here is my question: Do I leave my boyfriend of 8 years and the place I love to live to start my nursing career at least doing SOMETHING? Yeah it's not what I want to do forever, but at least it is a nursing position. I would be dong assessments, helping plasma donors with adverse reactions, giving HIV/Hep B/C positive results and starting pheresis sessions (not really IV, but not really phlebotomy with a 16 gauge). Thoughts? Comments? PLEASE respond-all advice appreciated-even if I don't agree :)

klone, MSN, RN

14,497 Posts

Specializes in OB-Gyn/Primary Care/Ambulatory Leadership. Has 17 years experience.

I'm sorry you're experiencing this. I'm guessing your boyfriend moving to MO is not an option (is there custody issues with an ex)? Nobody can answer your question for you - you need to figure out what your priority is as far as work vs. being with your SO. Any possibility of finding work in a closer state than MO?

What would factor into the decision or advice - how old are you? How long have you and your boyfriend been together?


36 Posts

Specializes in None yet.

We have been together since 2005, I'm 32. He is moving up in his job and is not willing to relocate to MO, plus all of his family is in CA and all my family is in MO. Sigh...


73 Posts

Specializes in telemetry, ICU. Has 2 years experience.

I was a new grad in CA, same story graduated with honors everything, internships, etc. Nothing but rejection letters. I went out of state, doing the long distance relationship thing with my SO. It's hard, but totally worth it for me. Getting that golden year of experience- maybe you could relocate for a year? you are more likely to get a job with that year of experience. In the mean time, keep the faith! People are getting jobs, it's just very tough out there. It's a tough decision.


947 Posts

Specializes in L&D. Has 2 years experience.

A friend of mine is from Sacramento as well and had to move to Louisiana for school bc of the school situation. She is going to work here in LA b/c of the job situation there. If you are up to moving, go for it. You went to nursing school to be a NURSE! Good luck!

Nurse ABC

437 Posts

Has 14 years experience.

Go. Get some experience and give yourself a leg up on the competition. It's interesting to me that you're even considering moving. That kind of says something about your relationship. 8 yrs and not married and considering moving away...hmmm. If your relationship is strong it will survive but if they help you get your BSN you are going to owe them a few years. Something to think about.


216 Posts

Move; never base your future on a bf, I have done this with a gf and looking back, I made a bad bad mistake.

Specializes in Pediatrics, Emergency, Trauma. Has 18 years experience.

Please, please invest in your success in your career. I agree with another poster in terms of a relationship...if it's strong enough to survive, then it will. Your job offer sounds AWESOME and will open up wonderful opportunities, and it's specialized...Go for IT!!!


3 Posts

If there is an opportunity grab it and run. If you take it and it doesn't work out then you can go back and say I gave it a go and it wasn't for me, nobody has lost. Will this opportunity arise again? Invest in your future because nobody else can. You aren't being selfish by leaving you are being proactive in doing what you worked so hard for. I say take the offer because you don't know what it will lead to, your gain is the bf's loss. Good luck and enjoy.


36 Posts

Specializes in None yet.

Thank you all for your responses. I have talked with SO and kids...went surprisingly well. My SO and his children were so supportive during nursing school and still so now. Thinking about not seeing them that often hurts though :(. Even my close friends say the same thing, "Go for it-you guys made long distance relationships look easy!" My interview is tomorrow (I guess for formalities) and I am nervous like I was for my NCLEX.