What are some of the most ridiculous things patients have asked of you?

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what are some of the most ridiculous or outrageous things patients have asked of you? i am nurse one of two nurses with 4 patients the other night in delivery. place was hopping. i answered the light of one of the other nurses patients, who was a very immature primip (married), whom we were certain, at some point, due to her clinical picture, was going to be a c/s. she wanted to make certain i knew how to detach her from the monitor and help her to the bathroom. no problem. however, not two minutes after i had left the room, she rang again and began yelling. her nurse was busy (did i mention we had 3 other patients in active labor?) so i went in, expecting some sort of major problem. she asked me to scratch her ass...in those words, exactly...i was taken aback and she had to have noticed my facial expression as she quickly countered that she couldn't reach and her husband, who was wide awake next to her, didn't want to do it....i am ashamed to say that i did put on some gloves and not too willingly scratched it, but when she insisted we start wiping her after trips to the bathroom, i just had to ask how she had managed to reach herself all the months leading up to her current admission. she was also ruptured so there was no way....she was a real trip....i have also had patients ask that we pop zits and in my cardiac unit days, some of the requests from patients are just too risque to repeat, but never had i had such wacky requests on a regular basis, until i transferred to ob...how about all of you?

No one has posted here for a while. Does anyone have any more to add?

Specializes in cardiac surgery ICU.

Oh this is my favorite topic:

I had a patient call 911 to request a new nurse.

I had a patient demand that we find a mug for their coffee cuz he wouldn't drink it out of a sty cup. (we then asked. are we at the holiday inn?)

I have had a patient ask me to lift up his.... cuz he didn't want to touch it

I have had numerous patients ask me to place a dinner for them in outside restaurants (on very restricted diets)

I had one patient demand that only one nurse could be her nurse and she wanted her there 24 hours a day (um hello?)

I had a patient ask me to pull out the rest of the stool cuz he didn't want to "strain" (seriously?)

I had a patient ask me to cath him cuz he didn't "feel like getting up and going in the bathroom"

oh memories... lol

Specializes in Alzheimers and geriatric patients.

Well I've been asked by several patients to kiss their ass. does that count??

Specializes in Med/Surg.
I wear my cap, white panty hose, white uniform white shoes - you get the picture. (Hey! Who hollered out DINOSOUR from the back row?) Anyway, I was just starting my shift, and a patient came up to me and asked "excuse me, are you a nurse?"

(No, of course not dear patient, I'm from psych just doing my community hours here.Why do you ask?):confused:

:lol2::lol2::lol2::lol2:

i work as a nurses aide for the summer since i am in nursing school. i had a 96 year old, female patient ask me, "arent you ashamed that your black?" ...i am as white as can be, not even tan.

Specializes in -.

- Being asked to squeeze someones black heads out :uhoh3:

- Routinely being asked by (elderly) women to shave their chins

Specializes in Geriatrics, Home Health.

I work in LTC. Residents can have pets, but they have to care for their pets. One couple has 2 cats. She and her husband have varying degrees of dementia. If the cats seem needy (one only meows when she's hungry), I ask if they have been fed. Sometimes she asks me to feed the cats.

Specializes in Geriatrics.

Before I became a nurse, I did private home care- I had one 85 year old pt that I bathed QOD because he had rheumatoid arthritis and could not bathe himself. He decided that the washing of his genitals stimulated testosterone production and would make him feel better if I would "do it a little harder and more of it" He stated it would be a medical therapy, I told him it would be prostitution. He even typed up a business card for me ( he could type with one finger on each hand)- "testosterone therapy" , photocaopied some info on the benefits of increased teststerone production and had his daughter cut out 2 obits from the local paper of 2 ladies that had passed recently and left elderly husbands behind that could use my services!!! ( she didn't know why he wanted them) I talked w/ his daughter and after a stern talking to, this kind of talk and requests stopped. His daughter was sooooo embarrassed!

Specializes in Peds, Hospice, Home Health, Dementia.

It was not so much what my pt asked me to do... but merely a suggestion.

Upon transferring him from W/C back to bed he refused to allow me to put the gait belt on. I tried explaining that since he was only wearing a gown, I would have nothing to grab onto in the even that he started to fall...

He replied, "uh huh.... just grab my member!"

Oh boy... old men never lose their drive.

He replied, "uh huh.... just grab my member!"

Oh geez...let's see..."I'm sure I could do that, however I don't think you'd enjoy having your entire body weight suspended from that particular appendage."

Male patient, born male, insisting that he was pregnant....and the doctor DID order a Urine Pregnancy Test because the patient insisted on it.

A male patient asked me to put the Pulse Oximetry Probe on his member....so sick and wrong!

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