What was the MOST ridiculous thing a patient came to the ER for?

And did you have to treat them?

I am just curious. Your stories always seem to either crack me up or shake my head in amazement.

Thanks for sharing ?

We had one at 5:30 in the morning who came in because their "cock ring" got lost in the lady parts. She wanted the doc to get it out.

Specializes in home & public health, med-surg, hospice.
BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!! :lol2:

Tell em all yeah it was probably from that - thank god you gave up the bottle of olive oil, the car battery and the duct tape before he really got hurt!

I know, right?!! Funny how your perspective changes...lol, @ 21-22 y/o I was so embarrassed. Now, @ 35, I'd be so proud...:lol2:

We have patients who call EMS to bring them to the ER for a bogus complaint..then get inside the ER proper...refuse to be seen.... and then walk to the supermarket next door...they just needed a ride

And then want a ride back home. "Aw, come on, man! Waddya mean I can't get no ride home? You brought me here! I don't got no cab money. I know my rights!"

Savvy

Oh, and then there was the patient wanted to know it he had 'roaches of the liver' (cirrhosis) because if he did, it was too late to stop drinking, and if he didn't, why stop?

Savvy

Specializes in ER, ICU, L&D, OR.

Last night I triaged 5 people in a row all c/o SOB, numbness tingling, carpal spasms,O2 sats all at 100 no surprise, also with a positive RMS. Their families were all hysterical about them having possible MIs and CVAs. They were aged 15 to 19. Bad enough they were all hyperventilating, but why in hades would their parents even begin to think they were having MIs and CVAs. Iwas sympathetic with the first 2 then it just kind of wore me down and then I wanted to, but didnt, slap them all sillier than what they were beahving. The patient and their Families.

Specializes in ER/SICU/Med-Surg/Ortho/Trauma/Flight.

We had a guy one night who came in by ambulance for c/o a sore throat.

It went like this:

EMS: Barnes, Barnes this is St.Louis county EMS 4

Me: Go ahead EMS 4

EMS: Yes barnes we have a 26 y/o male with a c/o sore throat no other complaints at this time, we could not get you on the line 8 minutes ago so we called such and such dumbass community hospital who ordered us to start an IV and give 25 of demerol, his vitals currently are 130/60, p-80, o2 sat 100%, Temp- 99.1 F, R-14

Me: ok, whats ur current eta (while im rolling my eyes and wondering why in the hell the family practice doctor at such and such dumbass community hospital would order an IV of NS and Demerol for a sore throat.):angryfire :nono:

EMS: about 4 min barnes

Me: ok ems 4 ( while the whole er staff is in the background dying laughing half of them on the floor:lol2: )

Then they get him there I felt like slapping him but didnt, anyways he gets mad and wants a stretcher room because I put him in the ent room in the dentist chair, then he wants a hot meal and me to authorize ems to take him back home.:madface:

Specializes in Pediatric Pulmonology and Allergy.

How long did it take for them to get the OR ready for that sore throat? Did the patient make it through the night?

Specializes in ER, NICU, NSY and some other stuff.

Had a fella come to the reg desk the other night wanting a note from when he had come in over the weekend. Now the problem was that HE HAD NEVER ACTUALLY CHECKED IN. He stated he got drunk fell and hit his head and his mom made him come in. He got there and it was busy in teh WR so he left without ever checking in. 1 week later he is standing at the desk requesting "Something on a hospital letterhead" that sates he had been to the ER on "Friday or Saturday."

"UUUHHHHH Not gonna happen."

Specializes in ER/SICU/Med-Surg/Ortho/Trauma/Flight.

Yes he made it and since I was charge nurse he made his a$$ go right out the front door and get his own ride because I wouldnt authorize EMS to take his stupid a$$ home, he was so mad at me when I explained that we were for patients with real serious emergencies and so was ems and we could have been helping a chest pain patient or cva pt. for the time he was taking from us when he could have went to the 24 hour urgent care next time im gonna ask if this patient is triagable and make ems drop him off at the front door.

Rod RN,BSN

oh my god this is something else. and wait till you hear what the doc told me to tell the person.:nono: i was working for an ob/gyn and i get a call from a young girl sounded like she was in her teens, she proceeds to ask me if you could get pregnant by a dog:uhoh21: omg the doc happened to be standing there when the call came in. I was in shock and trying to not laugh. the doc told me to tell her we just dont know.:nono: :nono: :nono:

The answer is "NO".

I think you handled it poorly. Laughing at a young girl who may be subjected to bestiality is hardly what I would call a professional intervention.

Getting more information and facts would be better than snickering.

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