What Is Your Most Gross, Yucky, Disgusting Nursing Horror Story?

[yazisizit]

I was working a night shift on a tele floor as a new Nurse.

We had this one poor old lady who was confused and was restrained as usual for her safety. She was our designated resident nightmare geri from hell, so she was placed near the Nurse's station.

So we are chilling out at the Nurse's station, chatting and trying to get through another night...

Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, I see our lady in question standing in the dimly lit doorway of her room!

I instantly leap out and run to her. As I approach her, she appears to be falling towards me, so I meet her in a bear hug...my arms around her waste, and her arms around my shoulders.

As I catch the lady, I notice a very strong smell of feces, and I feel something warm on my hands, arms and shoulders...

My fellow heroes come in behind me, and as the lights are turned on, my worst fears are instantly realized.

Yes, I caught the poor old lady with a good old bear hung football catch, but I was also covered in the lady's feces.

As I look at her, she has feces smeared all over her arms and hands... (and even her face!)

And of course, now so did I!

[RNDYN2CU]

you win. the ejaculat story i mean... it totally wins. Notice how popular this thread is, just shows to go you, humans, especialy nurses, have their attention picqued at the subject of gore!!! Love it!!!

[RNDYN2CU]

OK. My best stories are frm my first weeks at A county General Hospital in the unit holding the ER pts ready for another unit: FIRST patient- My preceptor informs me the next one off the elevator is my very own Pt, and she and the CHarge nurse are giggling. These are the very same women who nearly fell off their stools when I arrived off the elevator my first day of real nurse work, they were like " is that your graduation dress?!!! Are those your cute little new nurse shoes, AHA HA HA!!!" You tel me if nurses don't eat their young. Anyway, the pt was a man, with "FOREIGN OBJECT IN THE RECTUM," We got a LOTof these I later discovered...Mind you I was still naive to the world, (I quickley changed that...) and of course performed the 4 page assessment with detailed questions to the "T", asking each QUestion so as not to mess up... "Sir what brings you in?" "How many days have you had this condition?" " Do tell how you acquired the object?" with that he had one tear streaming down his cheek, and only looked at me, imploringly, like " Miss, must I?" I have more... later, Leslie

[gradcare, LPN]

Had a patient cough and end up with his intestines squirming like live sausages all over his lap through his abdo wound.

Had another lad present 2 days after being hit in the head with a hatchet .. he walked in with the hatchet still in situ. Sure breed ;em tough there

[gradcare, LPN]

OK. My best stories are frm my first weeks at A county General Hospital in the unit holding the ER pts ready for another unit: FIRST patient- My preceptor informs me the next one off the elevator is my very own Pt, and she and the CHarge nurse are giggling. These are the very same women who nearly fell off their stools when I arrived off the elevator my first day of real nurse work, they were like " is that your graduation dress?!!! Are those your cute little new nurse shoes, AHA HA HA!!!" You tel me if nurses don't eat their young. Anyway, the pt was a man, with "FOREIGN OBJECT IN THE RECTUM," We got a LOTof these I later discovered...Mind you I was still naive to the world, (I quickley changed that...) and of course performed the 4 page assessment with detailed questions to the "T", asking each QUestion so as not to mess up... "Sir what brings you in?" "How many days have you had this condition?" " Do tell how you acquired the object?" with that he had one tear streaming down his cheek, and only looked at me, imploringly, like " Miss, must I?" I have more... later, Leslie

Sometimes what brought you here ? should not be followed by "how did that get there ? ":chair:

[momcat107]

I was working in a nursing home and I got pulled to another unit.I go into this pts room to do her VS and I got a real nasty smell coming from her body.Not the usual smell,ie pee or poop. Smelled like something was dead,and had been for a long time.Suddenly she sneezed and reached under her jonny coat and came out with a handful of kleenex,some of which had some bloody drainage on it. Now I am curious,and I as her mrs so+so can I take a quick look? She said sure honey,takes off her jonny coat and on one side you have a normal looking 80 yr old breast.On the other side there is what I could only call a crater. Apparently she has had breast cancer,left untreated had eaten away all the tissue and left this huge hole where her breast had been.She decided to use it for storage. That day she had in there,mounds of tissue, her dentures (wrapped in toilet paper) a med cup,and a plastic spoon...... :barf01:

[kellerpatty]

Originally posted by Stud Muffin

[however he didn't realise there was a lid on it and he hoiked the biggest golly onto the lid that you've ever seen. I yelled at him that there is a lid on the cup and he promply sucked up the golly, took the lid off and spat it into the cup.

STUD MUFFIN, POOR THING!!!! YOU WIN, FOR GROSS!!!!!!

OH MY GAWD!!!!!!!! I CAN HANDLE ANYTHING, BLOOD, VOMIT, GUTS, I GAGGGED READING THIS. I HATE SPUTUM!!!!! WHERE IS THE VOMITTING SMILEY FACE.

I thought I was the only one who hated spit, phlegm, loogies, goobers, snotters...whatever you want to call them! The only time I feel like vomiting (and I work in a burn ICU with lots of burned skin, necrotic fasciatis, stevens-johnson, and other assorted terrible wounds) is when I see somebody spitting gooey, chunky green stuff or I have to suction horrible, sticky brown stuff up and out. I feel like throwing up now just thinking about it! I'm grateful for this this topic...I've been pretty much laughing the whole way!

[Tievoli]

I, too, work in long term care. Prior to doing CBGs in the mornings I carefully observed where the hand I want to prick is. It seems the one that is closest to me is the hand that is in the crotch...women and men!

My other story is of a demented lady. She always ate breakfast in her room. She usually had a BM after breakfast. Sounds normal doesn't it? Well, she had a habit of "digging herself out". If her tray was still in the room she would leave a special "tip" for the kitchen help in her ceral bowl and then carefully cover it up with a saucer!

LOL The first nursing home I worked in had a similar patient.... She always had a tin of wrapped candy on her table but never seemed to eat any. One evening I went in to her room to take her supper tray in to find her popping a piece of candy in her mouth and replacing it with another 'candy' then carefully re wrapping it and placing it back in the tin. She had been carefully rolling faeces up and wrapping it..... Thank god she never offered me a candy lol

[Tievoli]

I thought I was the only one who hated spit, phlegm, loogies, goobers, snotters...whatever you want to call them! The only time I feel like vomiting (and I work in a burn ICU with lots of burned skin, necrotic fasciatis, stevens-johnson, and other assorted terrible wounds) is when I see somebody spitting gooey, chunky green stuff or I have to suction horrible, sticky brown stuff up and out. I feel like throwing up now just thinking about it! I'm grateful for this this topic...I've been pretty much laughing the whole way!

I have only been an RN for 3 yrs but so far I think I have figured that 90% of nurses I work with gross out at phlegm. Most of my colleagues (and myself) can deal with vomit blood gore and stools of any consistancy but put a snotty patient in front of us and we retch the shift through

[banditrn]

I have only been an RN for 3 yrs but so far I think I have figured that 90% of nurses I work with gross out at phlegm. Most of my colleagues (and myself) can deal with vomit blood gore and stools of any consistancy but put a snotty patient in front of us and we retch the shift through

None of that stuff bothers me much, but one time I had a guy sitting at bedside doing a bath, and I went to wash his back, and he had this huge blackhead on his back, and it totally made me ill. Don't know why?:uhoh21:

I also don't like nasty TOENAILS.

[RGN1]

I have the usual faeces stories etc but I thought I'd tell you about this delight:

When I was a newly qualified staff nurse I worked in an ophthalmic unit. One evening shift the junior doc on call came up to me and said he had to go to the mortuary to harvest eyes for corneal transplant from a recently deceased patient & he needed assistance.

At first I was laughing at him & saying that he was winding me up etc etc but he told me it was true & please could I go. The other nurses on shift were adamant that NO WAY were they going so it ended up as muggins here!

Anyway, we walk over to the mortuary - it's pitch black, about 21.00 & it's pouring with rain.

We get in & the body's already on the table. The rain was so fierce it was coming in under the door. The doc starts & he's looking decidedly unhappy - well I'm even more unhappy. So I say to him can we at least keep talking because I'm finding this really creepy. So first he decides to teach me about how to enucleate the eyes. It becomes kinda interesting & we both settle quite well.

The first eye is out & in order to preserve the cornea he has to put a stitch through the muscle at the back & suspend it in a sterile pot. So there we are with 1 dead body (well several really but they are all behind closed doors), & one eye dangling from its thread in a pot & then theres' this almighty flash of lightning & massive crash of thunder!!! OMG it was just like a scene out of a Hammer House of Horror Movie.

Needless to say the lesson is ended & we resorted to singing silly songs while getting out the 2nd eye, had a few giggles trying to match the colour with the false eyes left in the box- they ALL seemed to be odd ones! Then we hot footed it out of there.

Next morning when I asked the charge nurse if I could take my time back - we had finished quite late. He said to me that he'd heard that I'd gone but although he would give me the time off I shouldn't have gone, it wasn't my job & the doc only wanted me there because he was too scared to go alone!!!!!

I'd fully intended to give him a piece of my mind but he was so thankful to me for going with him that I couldn't be mad. Afterall I'm pretty sure I'd have been glad of the company if it was the other way round. Besides that, he's given me my absolute favourite nursing story ever, with which I've delighted loads of kids & adults alike with over the years!

[allthingsbright]

oh god, these are horrid--I could only read a few. Had to stop cuz I am making chilli for dinner...ugh!

[I'mahappygirl]

Well I am a nursing student and I start clinicals in two weeks and you guys have scared the crap out of me. Yikes!!