I was working a night shift on a tele floor as a new Nurse.
We had this one poor old lady who was confused and was restrained as usual for her safety. She was our designated resident nightmare geri from hell, so she was placed near the Nurse's station.
So we are chilling out at the Nurse's station, chatting and trying to get through another night...
Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, I see our lady in question standing in the dimly lit doorway of her room!
I instantly leap out and run to her. As I approach her, she appears to be falling towards me, so I meet her in a bear hug...my arms around her waste, and her arms around my shoulders.
As I catch the lady, I notice a very strong smell of feces, and I feel something warm on my hands, arms and shoulders...
My fellow heroes come in behind me, and as the lights are turned on, my worst fears are instantly realized.
Yes, I caught the poor old lady with a good old bear hung football catch, but I was also covered in the lady's feces.
As I look at her, she has feces smeared all over her arms and hands... (and even her face!)
Hey, did you guys know that microwaved goat smells EXACTLY like C-Diff? I discovered this, to my chagrin, at clinical the other day. Note to self: Do not loudly wonder (in the break room, no pts around!) what smells so bad before you find out that it's the Ghanese nurse's lunch....
I had a coworker at the ECF who was a chronic practical joker. She told us about one of her prize winners from the early days. She got a diaper and put chocolate pudding in it. Walked down the hall carrying it bare handed, strategically folded so part of the inside (specifically the brown part) was showing. Her supervisor jumped all over her "What are you doing? You know you can't just carry that around! Where did it come from?" That was exactly the reply she was hoping for. She opened it up, said "I don't remember, wait a sec" The she stuck her finger knuckle deep in the pudding and licked it off. :barf01:
Hey, did you guys know that microwaved goat smells EXACTLY like C-Diff? I discovered this, to my chagrin, at clinical the other day. Note to self: Do not loudly wonder (in the break room, no pts around!) what smells so bad before you find out that it's the Ghanese nurse's lunch....
I'll keep that in mind, thanks. I've seen some chicken gumbo that looked just like it.
We had a gentleman call our clinic to ask what semen was made out of. It turns out he wanted to put semen in a dish that he was cooking for some friends of his, but he wanted to make sure that it wasn't something that anyone could be allergic to. (How thoughtful!)
We had a gentleman call our clinic to ask what semen was made out of. It turns out he wanted to put semen in a dish that he was cooking for some friends of his, but he wanted to make sure that it wasn't something that anyone could be allergic to. (How thoughtful!)
My first few months in a burn center we had a twenty something man admitted with TENS (nasty condition where the epidermis sloughs off and the mucous membranes, including the mouth, inner eye lids,and lungs slough off, and bleed and bleed and bleed) who had a history of IVDA, HIV, hepatitis, syphillis and herpes, not to mention a real joyful personality(one the rare times a patient on our floor was not intubated). Pts with TENS with ocular involvement often need to have their eyes "swept" with cotton swabs as often as hourly to perserve their sight: not exactly a comfortable sensation. Anyway, this gentlemen was so enthusiastic about his care regimen that he would spit blood AT you: purposely trying to hit you. Luckily he didn't succeed at hitting me, but a few of the staff did get "up close and personal" with his blood and body fluids (even with a full gown, mask, hat gettup, it still is gross to be spit at, especially blood). Yikes. Then there was the time that a 60% burn victim who hadn't pooped in days had a code brown blow out that literally was dripping off of the bed and puddling on the floor almost immediately after his two hour bath and dressing change. Never mind the insanity, that unit was a blast to work on excellent people made it tolerable, and every shift was "a party in blue pajamas"!
I've got tons to tell, having been in nursing since 1990. As of late, I'd have to say the most recent most gross, yucky, disgusting nursing experience I have had, was being hurled on from head to toe while inserting an NG tube in somebody who had an ileus. Thankfully it was at change of shift, the day nurse who I was supposed to give report to, ran in to take over while I ran to the bathroom to undress and douse myself with water (needless to say, I couldn't wait to get home and take a shower; but I did at least get a free pair of scrubs out of the ordeal).
It was our last day in DR, actually the last case we needed before graduation. I was waiting for my friend since I finished first and cleaning my area, when suddenly the woman delivering near my area shouted very loud and gave birth to a baby with a ball like parasites sticked together and while the DR nurse is holding the newborn baby the ball like parasites fell on the floor ....oh my and they start crawling like earthworms.....dont even touch the spaghetti we prepared for our lunch......
About a year ago working in the ER we had a homeless man come in, now he hadn't showered in I dont know how long his clothes were sticking to him when we pulled his shoes off the socks could almost walk off themselves. Now picture this the smell was the worst i have ever smelled, then we got his shirt off and realized that he had a colstomy, and it was covered with a plastic grocery bag!!!!!!! this man was also intoxicated.needless to say the bag wasnt helping!!!!
It was our last day in DR, actually the last case we needed before graduation. I was waiting for my friend since I finished first and cleaning my area, when suddenly the woman delivering near my area shouted very loud and gave birth to a baby with a ball like parasites sticked together and while the DR nurse is holding the newborn baby the ball like parasites fell on the floor ....oh my and they start crawling like earthworms.....dont even touch the spaghetti we prepared for our lunch......
I work in a small hospital in Alaska. last week we had a young pt who had a reaction to fentanyl and was admitted from surery to the ICU. We have cameras in the room, BTW. She had recovered enough to be discharged so we were relaxing at the desk when I looked up and she was picking her nose. I told my co-worker "it is amazing what you see on those cameras." A second later, she puts the "results" in her mouth!!!! A while later, she was picking a scab on her forearm and ate THAT!!!!!!!!!:uhoh21: :chair: . Yes...There were psyc issues. YUCK!!!!!
My first few months in a burn center we had a twenty something man admitted with TENS (nasty condition where the epidermis sloughs off and the mucous membranes, including the mouth, inner eye lids,and lungs slough off, and bleed and bleed and bleed) who had a history of IVDA, HIV, hepatitis, syphillis and herpes, not to mention a real joyful personality(one the rare times a patient on our floor was not intubated). Pts with TENS with ocular involvement often need to have their eyes "swept" with cotton swabs as often as hourly to perserve their sight: not exactly a comfortable sensation. Anyway, this gentlemen was so enthusiastic about his care regimen that he would spit blood AT you: purposely trying to hit you. Luckily he didn't succeed at hitting me, but a few of the staff did get "up close and personal" with his blood and body fluids (even with a full gown, mask, hat gettup, it still is gross to be spit at, especially blood). Yikes. Then there was the time that a 60% burn victim who hadn't pooped in days had a code brown blow out that literally was dripping off of the bed and puddling on the floor almost immediately after his two hour bath and dressing change. Never mind the insanity, that unit was a blast to work on excellent people made it tolerable, and every shift was "a party in blue pajamas"!
this man was also intoxicated.needless to say the bag wasnt helping!!!!
A while later, she was picking a scab on her forearm and ate THAT!!!!!!!!!:uhoh21: :chair: . Yes...There were psyc issues. YUCK!!!!!
elizabells, BSN, RN
2,094 Posts
Hey, did you guys know that microwaved goat smells EXACTLY like C-Diff? I discovered this, to my chagrin, at clinical the other day. Note to self: Do not loudly wonder (in the break room, no pts around!) what smells so bad before you find out that it's the Ghanese nurse's lunch....