I was raised in a conservative Christian family, similar to Mennonites in beliefs and dress. My sisters and I weren't allowed to wear pants except for playing outside in winter, etc. Last year I became a CNA and my parents made me wear a scrub skirt instead of pants for clinical. It was awful and embarrassing, it looked really awkward because I had to wear dark nylons with it, I looked so old-fashioned and it was nearly impossible to do things that included squatting in a way that wouldn't give everyone a view up my legs! I was very uncomfortable with it, but my parents didn't care. At the very end of clinical I couldn't take it anymore and just bought some scrub pants, which my parents were really mad about when they found out.
I am 18 now, and although my faith is important to me I don't believe that it's necessary for women to wear skirts only. I think that there are times when it is way more appropriate to be wearing pants, particularly in this kind of job. I do love skirts, but not when it's impractical. I will be starting my nursing clinical in a few months and have decided that I will not wear skirts for it.
I have reiterated many times to my parents about why I wanted to wear pants as a CNA, including that I'd rather have my legs completely covered and not with extra fabric swishing around to get gross stuff on it (urine, blood, nasty stuff in general) and I like being able to squatg down to do things like put Teds on a patient or put briefs on them, without twisting around in uncomfortable positions in order to keep my underwear from showing! I don't want to kill my back, which is what will happen if I keep on doing that. I also really hate the "sexy nurse in a dress" stereotype- it makes me cringe!- and that's all I think of when I think of a nurse in a dress. During clinical, people would also comment on how "cute" my skirt was, and it bothered me because I don't want to be seen as cute, I want to be seen as professional. I also just want to do my job comfortably, and not look old-fashioned. I also live in New England and it gets so cold in the winter!
Anyway... I know that firmly deciding that I will be wearing pants during nursing school (and later on as a nurse) is not going to go over well with my parents. I have a feeling like they might even tell me I can't live at home anymore unless I wear skirts (I'm 18). I really respect their belief but it's just not what I believe. Has anyone gone through a similar situation or can give some advice? I would just like for them to accept how I feel about it and respect my decision without causing hard feelings.
Specializes in Psych, Addictions, SOL (Student of Life).
I have considered it. I would hate to do that because I don't want to be deceptive or hypocritical, and my parents would be really mad if they ever found out. I just really want to find a way to not cause hard feelings with my parents on this whole issue, yet be able to wear comfortable, practical and nonrestrictive clothing...
There is nothing in the bible that says a woman can't wear pants. I understand that you want to honor your parents and the faith you grew up in. You are an adult now and can make your own decisions. Be respectful when discussing this but be firm. Check the uniform standards for your school it may well be that skirts are not an option. If so there's no more argument. other wise tell them how much you love them but you're going to wear pants to work/school.
Specializes in Cardiology, Cardiothoracic Surgical.
Welcome to adulthood. As other PPs have said, you need to decide if this is a "hill you're willing to die on". Personally, I would wear
normal clothes out of the house and then change into the pants at work. Keeps the germs contained, and the drama between the parents down.
If you want to let your parents control your adult life, then that's great, but at some point you're going to need to figure out if your life is more important than your parents'.
I disagreed with my parents over my life and left home at 18 for college. One of the best decisions I made.
Specializes in ER, Med Surg, Ob/Gyn, Clinical teaching.
I also grew up in a conservative environment. Not just religion wise but also culture too. So I think I understand what you may be going through. Even nurses in ma country do not wear scrubs we wore skirts and white dress-like uniforms. But here in the U.S. things are really different.
For my family, we never wore jeans and pants. And my parents and relatives still frown at them. What I always asked them was this, what if I was working in the military or oil rigs where skirts and dresses will expose you to more harm than good. What would they have expect me to do"... Truly, whenever I ask these questions it silences them, even for a while.
Also, you're an adult now - 18. You should be able to do what makes you comfortable, especially for the job you did.
Or maybe a long tunic over pants, like the Indian ladies wear.
I thought this seemed like a good suggestions. OP, do you think that your parents would find this a reasonable option?
I commend you for not wanting to deceive your parents by changing into pants at work.
Do you think that you could find resources from your religious group at large (beyond your local pastors) regarding the mandate for women to wear skirts and the possible exceptions to that guideline?
I know we all wear scrub pants to work, and I love them. It is possible to nurse in skirts or dresses I did it for years before pants and tunics came in, I could do everything I do now and more ( I was younger lol)
I like the idea of long top and tunic like the Indian ladies wear
At 18 it is hard to leave and be on your own, we think we are grown up but we do need our family-maybe you could go to work in skirt and change into scrubs at work, let you parents know this-work is work and home is home-seperate the two
I thought this seemed like a good suggestions. OP, do you think that your parents would find this a reasonable option?
I commend you for not wanting to deceive your parents by changing into pants at work.
Do you think that you could find resources from your religious group at large (beyond your local pastors) regarding the mandate for women to wear skirts and the possible exceptions to that guideline?
My religious group at large does not require women to wear skirts... my family just belongs to a more conservative part of our church denomination (the denomination is Church of the Brethren). Although it's technically not a "requirement", wearing skirts is expected and wearing pants in public is very much looked down upon.
The scrub tops that I have had in the past have been fairly long. I will point that out to my parents.
hppygr8ful, ASN, RN, EMT-I
4 Articles; 5,212 Posts
There is nothing in the bible that says a woman can't wear pants. I understand that you want to honor your parents and the faith you grew up in. You are an adult now and can make your own decisions. Be respectful when discussing this but be firm. Check the uniform standards for your school it may well be that skirts are not an option. If so there's no more argument. other wise tell them how much you love them but you're going to wear pants to work/school.