Was I a complete idiot for wanting to get into OB? Now I'm lost and don't know what to do with my life.

[RubyJuly2020]

When I was a freshmen in high school, my friend’s mom was a Labor and Delivery nurse. She talked about her job often, and I always found her stories fascinating. I would ask tons of questions, and she noticed I was super interested in OB nursing so she invited me, her daughter, and a group of students from our class, to come to the hospital and show us around. She took us to a class room and talked to us about her job. Showed us different instruments used during labor, and described the process. She even showed us real placenta. Everyone found it gross and uninteresting, but honestly I loved every minute of it. I knew that’s what I wanted to do when I grew up. No other career excited me in any way. Well I graduated high school, went to college and got into nursing school.

Once I was in nursing school, I realized that half the nursing students in my cohort wanted OB. I was shocked and disappointed that area was so popular. There are only 3 delivery hospital areas in my area, so obviously not all of us could work there. I also looked online and found out how popular this specialty was, and how extremely difficult it is to get into. My heart sunk. All this work for a pipe dream, when I thought it was a realistic plan. During my clinical rotation I met a nurse that told me she applied to OB several times in the last ten years and couldn't get in. From what I saw she was an excellent nurse, so if she can’t get in, how can I. I was an average student. I absolutely loved learning and my clinical rotations, but nothing about me stands out as an excellent nurse. Other students in my cohort were much smarter, and far more gifted. I’m just OK. I feel like I wasted my life. Other areas of nursing are fine, but not anywhere near as exciting and special to me. I had one day in clinical at the labor and delivery unit, and I thought, this is it! I’ll never work here, but at least I had one day to live my dream. Best day of nursing school ever, even cried after. I graduated nursing school and never took the NCLEX. Every time I sat down to study I got depressed. I feel sick when I think about nursing, and now don’t know what to do. My family is extremely disappointed in me not taking the NCLEX, and just having a minimum wage job. I’m thinking about taking the NCLEX and getting a normal floor job, even though it doesn’t have a strong appeal to me. I feel like an idiot, and wish I could back in time an punch myself. Why did I think it would be so easy? I also had a clinical in the OR and loved it. I looked it up and found out that was hard to get into also but not impossible. from what I understand the hospitals only accept pari-op once a year and there is no guarantee of getting a seat. Any advice would help.

[turtlesRcool]

I'm a career changer, and it was my experiences as a patient when I had my babies that made me want to become a nurse in L&D. I loved my OB clinical, and was pretty 'meh' on med-surg. Then I graduated and got a job in med-surg. Moreover, it was in the float pool, which means the learning curve was pretty steep. To my surprise, I really like it. I've floated down to maternity, and it's actually not as interesting as I thought it was going to be. Honestly, lots of paperwork. This is not to say that OB shouldn't be your goal, but you haven't really given anything else a chance. And, no, clinicals are not the same as being the RN. You might find you like something else, but you'll never know if you don't try.

[eerrmm]

Nope, not an idiot for being interested in OB. You're an idiot for not taking the NCLEX immediately after graduation.

Prep and take it asap. Get a job - apply for OB positions - who knows, you might get lucky, but get a job and go about your life. Keep searching for OB positions after you get that first year experience doing a job you don't like. Make friends w/ peeps in OB if you can.. might take a couple years but in the grand scheme of things, that's nothing. At least you're really interested / believe you'll love a realistically obtainable job. The same can't be said for most people.

[ktmgrup]

Hi, Have you ever thought about working in a doctor's office? You could try an OB/ GYN practice or pediatrics. I always wanted to work with children, pedi is another hard field to get into. I worked for 30 years in a pedi office and loved it.

Good Luck

[MarkMyWords]

You are not an idiot, of course. Merely disillusioned, wishful thinking. What's your second choice? Third? What is so glorious about OB? (I read that one woman actually delivered her own baby from Youtube in a hotel.) I am not a nurse, but I think it is better to move onto another specialty, or family practice than stay in an area you hate or ambivalent about. What area are you willing to devote 10 years or more of your life?

[kbrn2002, ADN, RN]

I have to say you picked a heck of a time to get off the pot with NCLEX exams not being so easy to schedule now. Hopefully you were able to schedule before these unforeseen circumstances threw a monkey wrench into the entire system. As is stands now if you haven't scheduled the exam yet it might take awhile.

On the other hand, being a year out of school that delay that is now beyond your control will give you that much more time to study and prepare yourself. Not to mention unless they resume the full length testing right away you might get in that window of a shorter test. It won't be easier, but at least you won't have the added stress of looking at the daunting possibility of getting 265 questions.

No matter how your nursing career progresses, you'll never actually have that nursing career if you don't take that next step. You successfully graduated, now you just need to get that test out of way. Then you can really start to pursue that dream. It might take a bit of a roundabout path to get there, but it might not. You'll never know until you try!

[MarkMyWords]

I am not a nurse but I agree, it makes sense.

[peeweedelivery]

I don’t understand why you are shooting yourself in your own foot?!!? Why aren’t you willing to try? Even if it takes you several attempts, as an OB manager, I would be impressed if a candidate tried over and over to work on my unit, and quite frankly, I would be put off if a candidate gave up so easily. Labor n delivery typically has very strong willed nurses who are expected to advocate for their patients (which you should do no matter what nursing specialty), so I would say, go for it!! But try to work on some confidence, maybe do volunteer work on the unit?

[RubyJuly2020]

On 3/27/2020 at 2:37 PM, Mywords1 said:

You are not an idiot, of course. Merely disillusioned, wishful thinking. What's your second choice? Third? What is so glorious about OB? (I read that one woman actually delivered her own baby from Youtube in a hotel.) I am not a nurse, but I think it is better to move onto another specialty, or family practice than stay in an area you hate or ambivalent about. What area are you willing to devote 10 years or more of your life?

I don't know exactly what so glorious about it LOL. I basically went to nursing school to become an OB nurse, not another type of nurse. That was my biggest mistake. I only saw that one specialty, and went to college with the intention of that one path. I didn't even consider any other type of nursing. When I started nursing school almost half of my cohorts wanted OB also. I honestly was disillusioned LOL. I thought Labor and Delivery would be an available choice. I even thought that if you wanted OB in nursing school, they could arrange for you to have your preceptorship in L&D, making getting a job even easier. LOL I was wrong. My school didn't didn't even offer a preceptorship in OB. Wishful thinking for sure. My other choice besides L&D/MB is OR actually. When I did my clinical day in the OR, I enjoyed it tremendously. Only down side is, OR is also a hard to enter specialty. I think I might just have way to high of standards and need to come back down to earth.

[RubyJuly2020]

On 4/14/2020 at 9:49 AM, peeweedelivery said:

I would say, go for it!! But try to work on some confidence, maybe do volunteer work on the unit?

I would love to volunteer on a L&D unit. I actually live 2 minutes away from a hospital. I didn't know you could pick the unit you volunteer on. I'll have to look into it. Thank you.

[RubyJuly2020]

On 4/11/2020 at 2:19 AM, kbrn2002 said:

I have to say you picked a heck of a time to get off the pot with NCLEX exams not being so easy to schedule now.

Very true LOL. I plan to take mine in June. I'm studying daily for a few hours a day. Hopefully by June testing resumes, as normal. I did see they are offering shorter tests, which sounds nice, but I need a little more time to study. If by June the tests are still short, I'll go ahead and take it.

[Newnurse24]

Hi RubyJuly2020,

I graduated almost over a year ago and took my NCLEX after preparing for it for a part of my 2019 Summer. For me, It was worth the preparation and hard work I put in because I passed after 75 questions.

I can relate to you a lot about feeling discouraged because some specialties are hard to get in, and some of them require experience and sometimes luck!

But, 1st! You need to prepare for NCLEX and take it! Do not wait another minute. 2nd! Apply for jobs after passing the NCLEX, I applied for so many jobs in one hospital, that I got the attention of one HR who called me back and scheduled me for 3 job interviews with the respective nursing supervisors of those floors. I ended up with three job offers from those supervisors! I was so happy, and I think that PERSISTENCE is key! (Of course, I never heard back from other hospitals at all). But, the one place, I persisted, called me back and I got my foot in the door without thinking twice!

Best of LUCK! You can do this.

[turtlesRcool]

11 hours ago, RubyJuly2020 said:

My other choice besides L&D/MB is OR actually. When I did my clinical day in the OR, I enjoyed it tremendously. Only down side is, OR is also a hard to enter specialty. I think I might just have way to high of standards and need to come back down to earth.

Yes, you do need to "come back down to earth," but not because of your standards. It's because you're allowing your fantasies of what you *think* a few specialties are like to keep you from exploring the myriad opportunities of an entire profession.

You spent a day in the OR. A day. You observed. That's it. You spent a day in L&D. A DAY. You observed. That's it. Enjoying a day at a clinical and deciding that you're going to pursue that specialty is like enjoying a first date, and deciding that's the person you're going to marry. I'm sure you enjoyed it, but that doesn't mean you have any idea what being an OR or OB nurse is really like. Having a friend's mother show you around when you were 14 doesn't prepare you for L&D any more than I know what it's like to be an astronaut because I spent a week at Space Camp (which I enjoyed tremendously).

This is not about "standards" being too "high." OR and OB are not higher standard specialties. They are hard to enter because they are very niche specialties that require non-transferrable knowledge/skills and have low turnover. It's expensive and time-consuming to train nurses who don't already have that specialized knowhow, so they'd much rather hire people with relevant specialty-specific experience. They also don't want to invest the time and money training new grads who leave when the realities of the job don't match the fantasies of what they thought the job would be like.

Just before COVID blasted everything out of normal, my hospital was starting up an OR training program for internal applicants. They're not hiring new grads because the OR wants you to know your basic nursing really well before they start adding on OR specific things.

As for OB, my hospital does hire internal applicants to maternity, NICU, etc., but applicants have to wait for a "will train" posting. And just as it's hard to get in, it's also hard to leave. After a few years of not using your adult med-surg knowledge, you get rusty. When I was a nursing student and wanted OB, a nurse manager told me to be sure that's what I really wanted because once I was in it, there was no place to go. Sometimes we'll get a float from pediatrics or MB, and they are so lost on a med-surg floor.

I'm not saying everyone must do a year in med-surg in all cases, but there's good reason a lot of people give that advice. A job is a job. It doesn't have to be perfect and it doesn't have to be your dream job. It should be something you like at least a little, can do reasonably well, and pays the bills. Are you really happier working at an unskilled minimum wage job than you would be working as a nurse in another department?

Don't look at other nursing jobs as failures. Look at them as stepping stones. You have no nursing experience. You need an entry level job. So pass your NCLEX and find an entry level job. If you decide OR or OB is still your dream, pursue one of those positions once you are proficient at basic nursing practice and time management skills.