Very worried I made a huge mistake..just need some advice

Published

So just to give a little background. I have been a nurse for over 20 years. Excellent career record. I was diagnosed as bipolar as teenager but stopped taking meds around 18 years old and went on to excel in college, excel in my career and do well in general. Around 2011 I was in a horribly toxic relationship and my bipolar came back like an angry bull. I attempted suicide twice, was hospitalized inpatient and left my job without notice because of the embarrassment of it all (was in a supervisory position). Even once leaving the hospital I did not feel capable of doing my job, my attention span was horrible, emotions all over and felt it was not right to work that way especially as a critical care nurse. In a nutshell I have not worked since 2011 as an RN though I did take care of my father when he passed and it light the fire that made me want to get back into nursing (that and bills lol).

During those three years I was dealing with severe anxiety and took to smoking pot to help alleviate it and frankly to help keep my emotions more even keel. When my father passed a few months ago I decided to move forward and reclaim my career. I gave up smoking pot exactly 35 days ago today. Been doing well and using more practical and healthy ways of controlling my anxieties which come far less frequently anyway. I had an interview yesterday I just starting applying last week and was surprised to get a call that quick. The employer essentially offered based on background check and then walked me to a room and told me I had to do a urine test. I really did not think much about it at the time cause I figured at 30+ days I would be fine but since have done some research and am concerned that the potential exists I could fail (kinda fat, I do work out and walk a lot though). I did a home test that come back inconclusive, sigh, and maybe its my anxiety but I am freaking out that I made a mistake here. What are the ramifications if I fail the pre-employment screening, is it reported to the board or is it a employer decision. Does anyone have advice on how to handle it if I do fail?

I know smoking weed was stupid to some degree, I am being honest when I say that I never smoked it while employed and never would. Not that I have an issue with it, just I realize the consequences are not worth it at this time. I have worked hard to get back both mentally and physically and to see it be submarined by this would be more than I could bear. Thanks for letting me vent you all...know I am rambling but it feels good to express this and get it out. Hopefully its a non issue but I am a big believer in being prepared to deal with things after what I have been through.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Gerontology RN-BC and FNP MSN student.

What's wrong with getting treatment for bipolar? I would suggest that be managed first. So sorry about your dad. Glad to hear your getting your "groove" back. I wish you only the very best....but try to deal with your diagnosis and think about support groups and get your condition managed.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in LTC, assisted living, med-surg, psych.

Hello there, and welcome to Allnurses!

Just out of curiosity, are you on any meds for your bipolar? If you're not, you may want to consider it to keep the anxiety and mood swings at bay, rather than smoke pot. Like you, I'm bipolar and have nothing against marijuana; in fact, I used to smoke it myself before I was a nurse. But even in these days when it's legal in a couple of states and probably going to become legal in at least a couple more, it's incompatible with a nursing license. Even if it's medical marijuana and you have a card for it, you can't use that as an explanation for smoking weed. But then, you probably knew that. :yes:

Honestly, I think you're probably safe now, although MJ is fat-soluble and takes longer to leave your body if you're carrying extra weight. Although we can't give you any medical advice per the Terms of Service of this forum, if I were in your place I'd talk to my psychiatrist about ways of combating the stresses of nursing, e.g. maintaining a strict sleep schedule, a good diet and exercise, some of which it sounds like you're already doing.

I had to give up nursing last year because of problems like you had---attention span issues, severe mood swings etc. I wish for you a smooth and easy transition back into your career. Good luck to you!

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Yes on meds and see a therapist and have attended support groups also. My primary reason for using pot while I was not employed as an RN was for management of severe anxiety. Seroquel gave me terrible side effects, I refused to take any benzo's have seen far to many people become chemically dependent on them. I am also aware though if I am to work as an RN, it will cause me nothing but headaches to use it. I have been working with my therapist and have found a number of other ways to reduce my stress even prior to deciding to come back as a RN. So far its has been fine, I have my moments here and there but am never even remotely tempted to smoke it.

My primary question/concern was how to handle the situation should that drug test come back positive? Not looking for any medical advice just simply advice on what to expect and how to proceed should that happen. I probably should have waited a few more weeks and then I would not have the concern at all but I was so excited to be in a position to work again and move forward it really never dawned on me I could still be at risk of being positive. Never have used pot while working as a RN and never would, so I was unfamiliar with the dynamics of how it clears etc. If I get through this test, I plan to never have to worry about it again as I wont be touching it again. Just thought that there might be some in here who have had a similar experience or those who might know what would happen.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
What's wrong with getting treatment for bipolar? I would suggest that be managed first. So sorry about your dad. Glad to hear your getting your "groove" back. I wish you only the very best....but try to deal with your diagnosis and think about support groups and get your condition managed.

Yea should have made that clear. Been in treatment for several years successfully with the exception of the anxiety issues that have progressively gotten better with treatment and coping strategies. So much so that I felt it was time to start rebuilding my professional life which meant giving up the weed obviously. I readily did that and have been fine without it and so long as I stay on the meds and utilize the tools at my disposal I think I will continue to be.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in LTC, Psych, Med/Surg.

Wait for the results and then ask questions. My guess is that you'll pass the drug screen and you won't post in this forum again.

Catmom :paw:

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Wait for the results and then ask questions. My guess is that you'll pass the drug screen and you won't post in this forum again.

Catmom :paw:

Well my experiences have taught me that the advice you just gave me is the worst way to handle things. Not being prepared is a good way to make a bad situation worse. Not looking for a way to skirt responsibility but there has to be some do's and don't when dealing with things such as that. Seems that waiting till my potential employer is on the phone to have a clue as to how to deal with it is not a "do' .... Hopefully I pass it, does not mean I wont post again, prior today and an internet search really did not know such a forum existed.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in LTC, assisted living, med-surg, psych.

I think catmom meant to say, we hope you'll stick around and won't need to post in THIS particular forum again. :yes:

Believe me, if you don't pass the UDS someone will let you know. Meanwhile, try to relax (I know, it's not easy) and allow events to unfold. You don't want to raise any questions that might lead to the employer wondering if your test is "dirty". Hang in there!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.
Well my experiences have taught me that the advice you just gave me is the worst way to handle things. Not being prepared is a good way to make a bad situation worse. Not looking for a way to skirt responsibility but there has to be some do's and don't when dealing with things such as that. Seems that waiting till my potential employer is on the phone to have a clue as to how to deal with it is not a "do' .... Hopefully I pass it, does not mean I wont post again, prior today and an internet search really did not know such a forum existed.
Really until that screen is positive...there really is nothing to "do". IF it is positive then you need to think about a lawyer, going to the BON and the stipulations that may be placed on your license in a monitoring program.

BREATHE right now...then see what you need to do there is nothing you need, or can do, right now....((HUGS))

Up Vote Up Vote ×

They cant report you to the state board of nursing IF you fail your drug screen for employment. ..If you were employed already and you failed a drug screen then it would be reported. .Drug screen to acquire the job is strictly confidential.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
They cant report you to the state board of nursing IF you fail your drug screen for employment. ..If you were employed already and you failed a drug screen then it would be reported. .Drug screen to acquire the job is strictly confidential.

Not true

Up Vote Up Vote ×
They cant report you to the state board of nursing IF you fail your drug screen for employment. ..If you were employed already and you failed a drug screen then it would be reported. .Drug screen to acquire the job is strictly confidential.

Are you serious? There are easly 5 nurses with in my nurse support group who all failed pre-employement sceeens that got reported to the BON and were referred over to our states Impaired Nurse Program.

So where ever or whom ever told you this totally has their information completly incorrect.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Join the Discussion