Transgender/Non-Binary Students

Published

Hello everyone!

I am a school nurse at a high school and have a lot of kids who identify as trans or non-binary and don't go by their government name and use different pronouns than what are listed on their school chart. While I will call a child their preferred name and use preferred pronouns, not all the teachers I work with are willing to do so. I have had situations where I am talking to other staff members about a student and am using preferred name/pronouns, and it creates confusion, and they have no idea who I am talking about. I.e calling the front desk to let them know the child is sick and going home.  Also, I have ran into the situation where a child is called one name and identifies as whatever gender at school, but mom and dad don't know that. I was just wondering how you guys handled these situations.

 

Side comment: Obviously, there are sometimes when the child needs referred to as their government name and gender for legal reasons and I do such when the situation warrants. 

1
Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in School Nursing, Ambulatory Care, etc..

As far as dealing with other staff members, I have no advice.  You may be able to work with your counselor and/or social worker (if you have them) to come up with a PD presentation for teachers and staff that provides education on helping students who are part of the LGBTQIA+ community.

As far as the parent/student situation, in the past, I've advised the student that, while I support them and will call them the name/pronouns they desire, when I call their parent, I will have to refer to them by their government name.  Same with calling the front office to let them know the student is ill and going home.  I guarantee you, most of these students understand and, as long as they feel support from you, will be okay with you referring to them by their birth name and pronouns to others.

I hope this makes sense.

9
Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in kids.
BunnyBunnyBSNRN said:

As far as dealing with other staff members, I have no advice.  You may be able to work with your counselor and/or social worker (if you have them) to come up with a PD presentation for teachers and staff that provides education on helping students who are part of the LGBTQIA+ community.

As far as the parent/student situation, in the past, I've advised the student that, while I support them and will call them the name/pronouns they desire, when I call their parent, I will have to refer to them by their government name.  Same with calling the front office to let them know the student is ill and going home.  I guarantee you, most of these students understand and, as long as they feel support from you, will be okay with you referring to them by their birth name and pronouns to others.

I hope this makes sense.

Same and cheers to the parents who recognize who their children are and allow for their chosen name/identification. I, too, try to support the student as best I can when I am with them, but when making that phone call or documentation, I must follow the formal name on record.  I fear we are in for a bumpy ride...

4
Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in mental healt/hospice.

I work in a child and adolescent mental health facility. Somedays I am just so busy, I cannot remember who is wanting to have different pronouns. If I do remember, I call them by their preferred name. Usually parents are here with them and they usually know their child is have gender dysphoria. When calling them back to get vitals I try to approach them without using any pronouns at all. I have let the kids know that for legal purposes the name on their chart or having to fill out forms for school etc, I will have to use their LEGAL name. We have had some kids decide they no longer have gender dysphoria and go back to way they were born

1
Up Vote Up Vote ×

This is certainly a sticky situation. A study done in 2023 showed 22% of Gen Z individuals identify as LQBTQ which is quite a statistical change from previous generations, even from a survey done in 2020 which showed only 15.9% identified as LGBTQ. What could be driving this change, especially compared to previous generations where the highest number is 9.8% among millenials? Will be interesting to see what pans out over the next decade as they "grow up".
Given all the current litigation about parental rights that are pending before the courts as well as the studies that are now showing long term adverse effects of using hormone blockers in puberty, I think you are on the right track with honoring their request for a specific name to be used but also using their legal names when dealing with parents and anything of legal record such as school attendance, medical charts, etc.

2
Up Vote Up Vote ×

Good grief! This is what we're down to? I wonder how many I'll trigger with my comment? Have a nice day everyone. 

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in School Nursing, Ambulatory Care, etc..
PPediRN said:

Good grief! This is what we're down to? I wonder how many I'll trigger with my comment? Have a nice day everyone. 

I don't understand what you are trying to say.  You didn't comment on this post, so I'm not sure who you think you'll trigger.  Can you help me understand, please?

3
Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Oncology, ID, Hepatology, Occy Health.
ChristinaFNP said:

 A study done in 2023 showed 22% of Gen Z individuals identify as LQBTQ which is quite a statistical change from previous generations, even from a survey done in 2020 which showed only 15.9% identified as LGBTQ. What could be driving this change, especially compared to previous generations where the highest number is 9.8% among millenials? Will be interesting to see what pans out over the next decade as they "grow up".
 

My guess, as a cisgender, gay man, is that the numbers aren't increasing necessarily but that it's easier to come out, and also easier to experiment with identities that may or may not be fluid over a lifetime. Not all of these kids will still identify as LGBTQ in 10 years time, however I believe a large proportion of them probably will. 

Look at any 1970s gay publication such as where I was in the UK, Gay News. There would be 300 personal ads for gay men and about 10 for lesbians. People concluded, "Oh, there are far more gay males than females." We now know that's not true and it was just miles more difficult in the 70s for gay women to come out, hence they stayed largely invisible. Similarly non-binary and trans people have always existed, they just didn't have the means or even the terminology to identify themselves. Plus it often wasn't safe (and sadly still isn't always) to express what they were feeling.  

I actually don't get hung up on percentages and statistics. Just let kids express themselves and in time they'll work out for themselves who they really are. The "it's just a fad" brigade somewhat annoy me, since being trans or non-binary is so not an an easy ride, you wouldn't just make it up to be "trendy." I work on the premise that as a gay man who in my youth faced the totally wrong assumption that homosexuality was a sickness or didn't exist (by people who weren't gay and knew nothing of my reality), similarly I will never be so patronising as to tell somebody else they don't know how they feel inside. 

Bravo to those of you who are making the effort with names and pronouns to make these kids feel included.

9
Up Vote Up Vote ×
PPediRN said:

Good grief! This is what we're down to? I wonder how many I'll trigger with my comment? Have a nice day everyone. 

Just attempting to make my office a welcoming place to all who enter. ♥️ 

6
Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in NICU, PICU, Transport, L&D, Hospice.
PPediRN said:

Good grief! This is what we're down to? I wonder how many I'll trigger with my comment? Have a nice day everyone. 

Are you feeling triggered by this discussion?  

4
Up Vote Up Vote ×
ChristinaFNP said:

This is certainly a sticky situation. A study done in 2023 showed 22% of Gen Z individuals identify as LQBTQ which is quite a statistical change from previous generations, even from a survey done in 2020 which showed only 15.9% identified as LGBTQ. What could be driving this change, especially compared to previous generations where the highest number is 9.8% among millenials? Will be interesting to see what pans out over the next decade as they "grow up".
Given all the current litigation about parental rights that are pending before the courts as well as the studies that are now showing long term adverse effects of using hormone blockers in puberty, I think you are on the right track with honoring their request for a specific name to be used but also using their legal names when dealing with parents and anything of legal record such as school attendance, medical charts, etc.

While historically "trans", crossdressing, etc has been related to trauma and/or organic mental illness it seems these days its become fashionable to be different.  People get off on being victims.  It's best not to affirm a person's delusions and instead point them towards the proper treatment.  

DavidFR said:

My guess, as a cisgender, gay man, is that the numbers aren't increasing necessarily but that it's easier to come out, and also easier to experiment with identities that may or may not be fluid over a lifetime. Not all of these kids will still identify as LGBTQ in 10 years time, however I believe a large proportion of them probably will. 

Look at any 1970s gay publication such as where I was in the UK, Gay News. There would be 300 personal ads for gay men and about 10 for lesbians. People concluded, "Oh, there are far more gay males than females." We now know that's not true and it was just miles more difficult in the 70s for gay women to come out, hence they stayed largely invisible. Similarly non-binary and trans people have always existed, they just didn't have the means or even the terminology to identify themselves. Plus it often wasn't safe (and sadly still isn't always) to express what they were feeling.  

I actually don't get hung up on percentages and statistics. Just let kids express themselves and in time they'll work out for themselves who they really are. The "it's just a fad" brigade somewhat annoy me, since being trans or non-binary is so not an an easy ride, you wouldn't just make it up to be "trendy." I work on the premise that as a gay man who in my youth faced the totally wrong assumption that homosexuality was a sickness or didn't exist (by people who weren't gay and knew nothing of my reality), similarly I will never be so patronising as to tell somebody else they don't know how they feel inside. 

Bravo to those of you who are making the effort with names and pronouns to make these kids feel included.

There is no such thing as "trans" and "non-binary".  It's perfectly acceptable to challenge the persons delusions or attempt to get off on being a victim.  As for homosexuality any youth who express interest in that lifestyle choice need to understand the risks of HIV/AIDS, syphilis, monkey pox, etc.  

-2
Up Vote Up Vote ×
NurseManFlorida said:

While historically "trans", crossdressing, etc has been related to trauma and/or organic mental illness it seems these days its become fashionable to be different.  People get off on being victims.  It's best not to affirm a person's delusions and instead point them towards the proper treatment.  

While I would agree with you there is something else going on for this large of a group of a generation to identify as LGBTQIA+, there still needs to be respect provided to every human being. My legal name is Christina but if I want to be called Chris, there is no reason for someone to not honor that request. When dealing with adolescents or any human being, honoring their name request is not the same as saying you agree with their status. It is showing respect for another human being and proof we can be bigger than our feelings and thoughts, something this country is sorely lacking over the past few decades. 

1
Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Join the Discussion