Top 10 Reasons Nurses Shouldn't Go On Vacation

A few of the reasons why nurses desperately need vacation time........and why we would be better off if we never actually took any.

Top 10 Reasons Nurses Shouldn't Go On Vacation

It's been only about 144 hours (give or take 20 minutes) since I bid my co-workers and residents "hasta luego" for ten days, but I already feel like I've been away for weeks.

This is both good and bad. Good because I've actually gotten to go somewhere, and now am relaxing at home for a few days before resuming my appointed rounds; bad because I just KNOW my desk is a magnet for work, and I can practically hear papers piling up to a height that will no doubt topple over onto my head the instant I walk into my office next Monday morning. Besides, I'm nosy, and I want the down-and-dirty on why one of our independent residents stroked out while I was at the seashore. I want to know if the PITA with the Munchausen's has managed to get himself sent to the ER yet again, or if staff have been able to hold the line with the limits I set on his behaviors before I left. Most of all, I have this morbid curiosity about whether anyone misses me.....or has even noticed that I'm gone.

So here's a top-10 list of reasons why nurses---especially neurotic, anal-retentive management types like me---really shouldn't go on vacation. Ever.

10) There's too much relaxation. What do you do when there's nothing to be stressed-out about? That's right: create something to be stressed-out about. What else?

9) There's not enough "stuff" to occupy the mind. Brains that are used to functioning at warp speed don't run as well in a lower gear, which leads to embarrassing gaffes such as blowing off the tip for a $150 meal and forgetting how to use a phone with a cord (good thing hotels put in those really durable ones that can handle being yanked out of the wall and dropped on the floor without breaking into a gazillion pieces).

? It takes too long to get used to not being responsible for everything. The waitress drops your cup of java in transit and YOU automatically apologize to HER.

7) Freedom to choose which activity to do first is a bit boggling when one is accustomed to a regimented schedule. Half the time you end up not doing anything at all because you can't make up your mind; the other half, you do things like "shopping/casino/beach......no, let's do beach/shopping/casino" and then you go to the casino first, which cancels out the shopping trip and lands you on the beach for the rest of the vacation because there's no money left for anything else.

6) You find yourself almost hoping some stranger will need medical attention, lest you forget all your skills in the space of ten days. Almost: See below.

5) The more practical side of you whispers, "Stethoscope? WHAT stethoscope??!" even though you've carried one in your car since nursing school and been known to use it while assessing victims at the scene of an accident.

4) Time seems to telescope on itself---a phenomenon which enables you to simultaneously wave good-bye to your co-workers on Friday night while walking in the front door on Monday morning.

3) You rent way more brain space than is healthy to the gossips, wondering if they're trash-talking you in your absence. (Paranoid much?)

2) Vacation time is bad for a nurse's twitchy GI tract, which is apt to rebel at the introduction of real coffee and actual food instead of the rotgut mud and canned/boxed meals they serve at the workplace (and which you grab by default because a) it's there, and b) it's free.) I'm on day 7 and still haven't gotten my inner workings straightened out yet.....it's like they don't even know what to DO anymore with fresh grilled halibut in lemon sauce and seasonal vegetables from the local farmer's market.

And then, there's the number-one reason why nurses shouldn't go on vacation:

1) We have to come back. No matter how much I love my job---and I do---there will be a moment or two on Monday morning when I'm really going to be hating life....like when that mountain of papers falls over and knocks the cup of Seattle's Worst out of my hand. :cool:

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VivaLasViejas

About VivaLasViejas, ASN, RN

Long Term Care Columnist / Guide

I'm a Registered Nurse and writer who, in better times, has enjoyed a busy and varied career which includes stints as a Med/Surg floor nurse, a director of nursing, a nurse consultant, and an assistant administrator. And when I'm not working as a nurse, I'm writing about nursing right here at allnurses.com and putting together the chapters for a future book about---what else?---nursing.

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Specializes in LTC, assisted living, med-surg, psych.

Or.....that moment could arrive a couple of days early, when I find out that a resident whose daughter complains incessantly (and even tried to get me fired just two weeks ago) has passed away unexpectedly. :eek:

I love my job.......I love my job.......I love my job.......breathe..........!

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Specializes in PERI OPERATIVE.

I have to show this to my boyfriend. He doesn't understand why I can never relax.

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Specializes in ICU, PACU, OR.

Nyquil cup of jack daniels, tablespoon of honey, squeeze of lemon-put in microwave for 10 secs and take the shot. You will go to bed and sleep like a baby, get up have a BM and wear a smile all day. I don't recommend this treatment except for the first days of vacation and all family reunions. No one understands the lifestyle of a nurse. We eat too fast, we control things and we are sleep deprived or on some kind of biorhythm that is not in sync with others. Take my advice and let go. Pad your vacation with a couple of days extra and never return on a Monday.

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Specializes in LTC, CPR instructor, First aid instructor..

marla, you amaze me with your innovative ideas in writing. kudos to you for another job well done.:up:

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Specializes in M/S,DOU/ER.

I tried to see the humor in the post and replies but its all just the same recycled story with different words.Originality counts for something.

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Specializes in OR, public health, dialysis, geriatrics.

Recycled or not this still rings true.

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Specializes in Geriatrics, Dialysis.

Just returned from a 12 day vacay myself, and I couldn't have put it better! I spent the first half in some sort of "what do I do now" stupor and the second half worrying about a] what gossip/news was I was missing at work and b] what mess would I walk into when I went back. Thanks so much!

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Specializes in Emergency Department.

Numbers 8, 9, and 1 over and over and over. Also, you swear you can still hear your acsom, or whatever nursing phone that is chained to you, in the distance.

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No vacation?? I do that, too - often think I am better off at work, keeping up with work. It's also hard to take a break when you love what you do - Helping People!

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Specializes in ICU, PACU, OR.

Better take care of yourself from time to time, too much work and not enough care for yourself can shorten your life. It's amazing that you have to learn to relax??? Sad but true.

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Specializes in none.

You better watch out or else that job will have you in a rubber room faster than you can say shock treatment. You need to go on a sixties vacation. Plenty of booze and drugs,acid rock on the stereo, and doing the nasty with anyone or any thing that is near bye. Stay stoned for ten days until you can't remember who, what or why you are. then take another couple of days to sober up and then go back to work. You will think you have a new job and you will be ready to take on what ever happens. It has work for me for years. Of course this had lead to some unexpected jail time on my part but everything comes at a price. This is a joke of course all I'm saying is that they are not paying you on vacation. Give your mind a rest. On vacation I'm a plumber. I still work in the trenches and I don't want to see sick people on my vacation

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