To all the moms out there: How did you do it?

greenfiremajick · Mar 4, 2010

Hello,
I'm 29 years old, with a 28 month old daughter, and expecting number 2 in August. I have been a graphic designer for 7 years now, and have become part time (working 2 days a week) since my daughter was born 2 years ago. I have now been considering a career change as I am loosing interest in the graphic design field for many reasons.
I have been leaning and researching nursing. My daughter was a 3.7 lb preemie, and I spent 11 days in the NICU with her. I was never interested in nursing before, but ever since then I guess my eyes were opened up to other options for where my passion lies. I would love to be a NICU nurse if that was the path I chose.
So as I've researched into this possibility I have looked into a community college that offers an excellent 2 year nursing program that would get me an RN degree. I looked into what my schedule would look like, and it would basically be like a full time job. The program is very rigorous (as I'm sure most of you know), 90% of classes and clinicals during the day. Which is where my problem is because I have no one to watch my kids.
I plan on quiting my job once our baby arrives in August. And my husband makes enough money to sustain us if I stay home with our 2 children, but I know we would not be able to afford me not bringing in any income, and having to pay full time daycare for 2 kids while I go to school. We don't have anyone to rely on as far as family members to helping us in watching our kids, as everyone works during the day.
So to make a long story short (probably too late for that)... I would like to know if there is someone that was in a similar situation and how you got through it. Maybe there's options that I am missing.
Thanks for reading!
Karina

May be a long shot, but sometimes community colleges have grants for people going to school and will pay for their kids to go into daycare. I'm talking about a grant given to the school, not one you must qualify for.....

butterfly journey · Mar 4, 2010

If you're like me you probably won't qualify for any aid that's GIVEN to you. What you might want to do is request financial aid in the form of school loans. No it's not exactly what you want to do, but I have been able to cover my son's daycare with it and the best thing is that I don't have to start paying it back right now. Yes of course, it earns interest that you will end up paying in the end, but it does reduce you current spending and make you're situation less expensive on a daily basis. Also there are some scholarships out there just for nursing students. Some are only $500, but hey anything helps pay for diapers right? Don't give up on nursing because you might not be able to pay for it, you can find a way, I did. Good luck.

jnw8606 · Mar 4, 2010

Some community colleges offer daycare vouchers for full time students

LeaRNed · Mar 4, 2010

I was in a similar situation and applied for extra loan money to be used for childcare expenses. They also have federal/state childcare (CCDF) assistance in my state (IN). That goes by household income and although it isn't super low, there is often a waiting list. I would apply for one or both ASAP.Good Luck.

carlajane2 · Mar 4, 2010

I could have written your post -- all of it, from NICU nursing to our financial situation. (Only difference is my kids are 1 and 3, not zero and 2 :) ) We're also adopting a third, expecting placement sometime next year. We can afford for me to stay home with the kids, but not to put them all in daycare while I go to school. If you're like me, you probably need at least some pre requisites before you could apply to nursing school anyway. I've basically just resigned myself to chipping away at as many pre reqs online as possible in the next couple of years, one at a time, while the kids are in bed (I took one last semester and will take another next semester). Then, in a few years when the all kids are in school, I'll be able to take the courses that aren't available online and apply to nursing school. At times it feels like so far away (especially because I just turned 40 and I wonder who will want to hire a 48 year old new graduate), but I'm trying to just enjoy this time with my kids, knowing that when they're older I'll be grateful I had it.

LETRN · Mar 4, 2010

I'm finishing up my BSN this May, and have a 6yo and a 5yo. My daughter was not quite a year old when I started school in 2006.

I got through school with kids because my husband had a good job, I used my inlaws and my parents for babysitting, I took the maximum financial aid package, and we budgeted our tax return through the year. I also work PT on the weekends as a CNA in the hospital where I do clinicals.

My advice to you would be that if you really want to go into nursing, don't let the fear of what's going to happen down the road stop you. I'm a walking testament that it can be done with budgeting and hard work, and I'm glad that I didn't let my overactive mind convince myself that the 'what-ifs' down the road would make it impossible.

Good luck to you!

CloudySue · Mar 4, 2010

My girls were a bit older and one was in kindergarten already, but during the summer they both had to be in daycare. Community college is so inexpensive compared to private four year colleges, so take that "savings" and request additional student loans to finance the childcare. This is what we did. The financial aid department tried to offer me X number of dollars, but I contacted them and told them that I needed more, and the next thing I knew that amount was upped to more than double what they had offered me before. It even took care of a mortgage payment or two through the course of the year. Even better: my employer will pay up to $100 per month towards my student loan payments.

The other thing that was more my concern was, losing the time with them while they were little. Often they were frustrated that they could not spend time with me, even when I was home. My husband would keep them downstairs while I'd study for a test in the bedroom. We told them how being a nurse would help our family be able to afford nicer things, and go do fun stuff like Chuck E. Cheese more often, etc. The big carrot we put in front of them was a trip to Disneyworld when Mom's a nurse. We have a trip planned now for later this year!

There is a lot of time I'll never get back. But I see it as opportunity cost. Now that I've been making a good salary for six months and we've been doing special things as a family that we never could afford before (going to the movies and getting the big popcorn, brand name "cool" clothes, a bigger Christmas) they aren't complaining. Yes, material items aren't everything, and I'm not that way by nature, but we had tightened our belt for so long that it makes me feel good to finally be able to do things for my girls! They were real troopers. I don't plan on spoiling them forever, but it's fun to not be poor anymore!

CFitzRN, ADN · Mar 4, 2010

I'm not going to be a lot of help because I waited until my kids were 7, 11, 14 and 16 before starting nursing school for the reasons you mentioned, and also for a reason carlajane stated - because I knew I would be forever grateful I had that time with them. I chipped away at the pre-reqs one or two at a time - evening classes. My husband would care for the guys while I did the evening pre-req classes. There was a program at the community college where I went to NS - it was called WIA (no clue what that stands for) and it covered tuition, books, uniforms, etc for the women who went to the trouble of filling out lots of paperwork and getting lots of teacher signatures every week. It was a great thing for them. I wasn't even aware it existed until 2nd semester and never was able to get it together enough to get all the paperwork in. Check with your school and see if they have anything like that.

mustlovepoodles, RN · Mar 4, 2010

Personally? I would wait until the babies are older. You're going to be very very busy with two children under 4. You're right. Going back to school will be like working full-time. Nursing school is very strenuous and if you have a family they have to be VERY flexible. For me, I couldn't stand to be away from my small babies for the length of time it will require. Your babies will only be small for the next 3-4 years and then that stage is over forever. For me, that would be too big a trade off. Nursing will be there when you're ready.

Just my 2 cents. :twocents:

proudnurseRN · Mar 4, 2010

My girls were a bit older and one was in kindergarten already, but during the summer they both had to be in daycare. Community college is so inexpensive compared to private four year colleges, so take that "savings" and request additional student loans to finance the childcare. This is what we did. The financial aid department tried to offer me X number of dollars, but I contacted them and told them that I needed more, and the next thing I knew that amount was upped to more than double what they had offered me before. It even took care of a mortgage payment or two through the course of the year. Even better: my employer will pay up to $100 per month towards my student loan payments.
The other thing that was more my concern was, losing the time with them while they were little. Often they were frustrated that they could not spend time with me, even when I was home. My husband would keep them downstairs while I'd study for a test in the bedroom. We told them how being a nurse would help our family be able to afford nicer things, and go do fun stuff like Chuck E. Cheese more often, etc. The big carrot we put in front of them was a trip to Disneyworld when Mom's a nurse. We have a trip planned now for later this year!
There is a lot of time I'll never get back. But I see it as opportunity cost. Now that I've been making a good salary for six months and we've been doing special things as a family that we never could afford before (going to the movies and getting the big popcorn, brand name "cool" clothes, a bigger Christmas) they aren't complaining. Yes, material items aren't everything, and I'm not that way by nature, but we had tightened our belt for so long that it makes me feel good to finally be able to do things for my girls! They were real troopers. I don't plan on spoiling them forever, but it's fun to not be poor anymore!

Your story could've been mine. :)- Good suggestions. (BTW, we are leaving for DW on Friday)

Saysfaa · Mar 4, 2010

I was in a similar situation. My solution was to be the child care giver. When they were able to handle their own homework/schedules/etc, for the most part, I started my way through the prereqs.