To confront or not to confront, that is the question

nightingale, RN · May 25, 2006

I would ask in as positive mannar that I could muster. I would emphasis that I wanted the conversation to be positive and a step forward in the direction of obtaining another position like that, should one become available, in the future. It would be a good thing to do so and show that you do really care and are moving forward.

No matter what people say, managers do converse about these type of issues.

Good luck on your next oppourtunity!

MA Nurse · May 25, 2006

If I do mention it to her, I planned on being more direct than that. How about "Why did she get the position when I was told it wasn't possible to reduce hours? I know people talk, especially women.

MA Nurse · May 25, 2006

I could really use more advice than this, I see 86 viewed this, please help!!!!!!!!!!

MA Nurse · May 25, 2006

HELP!! :uhoh3:

azhiker96, BSN, RN · May 25, 2006

I am most comfortable with a direct and honest approach. The key is to talk about your situation alone and not in comparison with the other person.

First, think about what you want and why you want it. In this case it may be fewer hours per week so you have more time for family. Why is it important to you? Maybe to spend more time with kids while they're young, or to spend more time fishing. What are you willing to do to get what you want. If you are truly willing to work elsewhere, that's important.

Once you know all these things, make an appointment to talk with your manager in their office. Then explain that you want a shorter shift and that it's important to you. You enjoy working in the department but this matters enough to force you to check for positions elsewhere in the company/hospital and even outside. Be reasonable, don't give a deadline but let your manager know you are ready to start looking for another position. This gives your manager time to see if they can change your shift but they know they can't put it off forever. You might find a better position and then they will have to fill your position.

You indicated there is a union involved. I've never belonged to a union and don't know how that affects your options to change jobs. Maybe there's a shop steward who can give you advice that will help.

Good luck!

viena · May 25, 2006

HELP!!

HI you mean "confronting a manager" I would like to help you can you be more specific on what is the issue that you want to confront your manager about. Ive been an HR manager for many years but changed my career to nursing

Nurse Ratched, RN · May 25, 2006

Merging two threads.

viena · May 25, 2006

It looks like there are two things here that you would want to do about your concern: to bring this matter directly to your manager or have your union rep do it is an as much that you are a member of the union they have to represent you for any grievance you have that is what they are there for and paid for by you although open communication is always a must between the HR and the employees if you want to go directly with your manager do it accordingly and professionally request a meeting with your manager or put it in writing and start from there. Dont complain of what they did to your co worker because they might have a legitimate reason why they allowed that just focus on your own and I am sure that if you have a very good reason why you would want a lesser hrs they should be able to grant you that based on I am not sure what would be their criteria to give you a positive response and if they give you a negative response then they should present you a specific legitimate reason why you were denied. Good luck

TazziRN, RN · May 25, 2006

If I do mention it to her, I planned on being more direct than that. How about "Why did she get the position when I was told it wasn't possible to reduce hours? I know people talk, especially women.

If you approach her this way, you will put her on the defensive and things will get worse, not better. You should approach her with the attitude of "I'm really disappointed that I didn't get the position, could you tell me why? I'd like to know if there's something about myself I need to change or improve on to increase my chances next time." You'll get the information you want without causing any bad feelings.

texas_lvn · May 25, 2006

If you approach her this way, you will put her on the defensive and things will get worse, not better. You should approach her with the attitude of "I'm really disappointed that I didn't get the position, could you tell me why? I'd like to know if there's something about myself I need to change or improve on to increase my chances next time." You'll get the information you want without causing any bad feelings.

Totally agree with TazzRn here. I know it is a big disappointment, and if for some reason this other nurse needs to leave that position, you may have immediate access to it. (this same senerio happened to my husband a few months ago. More pay less hours but went to someone with more seniority, last night she walked out (not nursing) and he was placed immediately in her position with her pay until it can become official.)

I am not in a union, so take this with a grain of salt, I personally would talk with the boss first, then bring in the union. Remember you can catch more with honey than with vineagar. Good Luck.

When did this happen and when are you thinking of going to talk? I would give myself a few days to gather my thoughts and calm down from the disappointment and discouragement.

Let us know what happens.:innerconf

MA Nurse · May 25, 2006

If you approach her this way, you will put her on the defensive and things will get worse, not better. You should approach her with the attitude of "I'm really disappointed that I didn't get the position, could you tell me why? I'd like to know if there's something about myself I need to change or improve on to increase my chances next time." You'll get the information you want without causing any bad feelings.

I agree with what you said except for asking what I can do to improve or change myself. We are talking about playing fair and by the rules. This manager hasn't done that, I know this for a fact.

I told her my reasons for needing this position, and apparently the other nurse's reasons were more valid. No matter, it should have been done by the rules...which is to post the position so everyone has a fair chance, not just giving it away after telling me no!

Nurses have unions for a reason, but some managers don't follow union guidelines.:angryfire