Things you'd LOVE to be able to tell patients, and get away with it.

[AngelfireRN]

Hi, my name is AngelfireRN, I'll be your nurse tonight.

I am not a waitress, nor am I your slave.

Yelling and hurling obscenities at me will not get you your pain meds any sooner than they are ordered. Nor will having your family member or entourage do the same.

Threatening lawsuits and having umpteen family members camp out in the halls or hold up the nurse's station will not get you preferential treatment.

Physically grabbing me as I go down the hall is NOT a good idea.

I do not give the orders, but I do have to follow/enforce them. This is something that you should take up with your doctor.

No, I will not call him again to ask him for more pain medicine. He has been called twice and has said no both times.

No, I will not give you his number so you can "straighten him out".

No, you are not my only patient, and I highly doubt that you are single-handedly paying my salary. On the off chance that you are, let's talk about a raise.

NO, NO, NO, I most empahatically will NOT come get you when it is time for your next pain shot while you are having a smoke break. I also will not bring it to you in the smoking room. (Have actually said that, I am allergic to cigarettes. I did it once, had an asthma attack, desatted to 83, and turned blue, according to the patient and my charge nurse, after the patient had to help me back to the floor).

No, I don't really care if your family has not eaten all day, they drove here by themselves, they are not sick, and no, I will not call for 6 guest trays. (This of course, is if the patient in question does not need all 6 family members present, and is not at death's door).

No, you may not have 3 six-packs of soda from the kitchen, there are other people that would like a snack, too.

No, they will not open up the kitchen up just for you, at 1 in the morning, because you don't like the snacks we have on the floor.

I could think of hundreds, but those will do for a start. I know it sounds mean, but this is why I got out of bedside nursing. When a hospital becomes the Hilton, I'm gone!

Have fun!

[eriksoln, BSN, RN]

Well, IDK about you guys, but I've been tempted to repeat things said by administration and management to pts:

"No more 1:1 sitters, they cost money. From now on, just put the one's crawling out of bed into a posey vest. A posey vest doesnt need breaks and is a one time cost."

"I know the low CNA staffing on this unit seems unfair and not getting baths done (I was a CNA for this one) upsets you. But, you're going to have a bleeding ulcer if you let patients have expectations like this of you. So what, a few people dont get bathed. You're smart enough to knwo which ones will complain about it and which wont. This isnt Bed and Bath General. Let the family members moaning about it do it."

"That pt. is a PIA and not reasonable. Make sure the attending D/C's them TODAY. If they are still here when I get back tommorow, I am writting people up" This was a pt. with a clot in the arm who's heparin had only been on for.....oh, 11 or 12 hours and was notwhere near theraputic.

"I dont care if that pt. on a heparin drip wants to go outside. I'm sick of hearing about pts who want to smoke. If they want to smoke, let them go. If they fall and die, its not our problem." This pt. had a critical high PTT.

"I cant do anything about the CNA's who fall asleep on night shift. What do you want me to do........come in here at night or something? Or, pay for there to be a manager here at night? Are you crazy? Those pts complaining about not seeing the CNA for the entire shift are just going to have to realize there is a nursing shortage, not a pt. shortage. Move on and find something more to your liking somewhere else if we are not the right unit for you."

Wonder what things would be like if administration and management were actually held accountable for their attitudes/things they say?

[imanedrn]

This is obviously a touchy subject for you, but I am certain that every single one of us could find at least one patient in this thread that we could identify with as well. I have friends and family who are alcoholics, who smoke, who have Hep C, who have died of cancer, respiratory failure, renal failure, and acute MI. The thing is, I don't expect the rest of the world to love them the way I do.

You love your son, as you should. It's wonderful that he has your support. He is very fortunate. Many people who live with mental illness do not have any support, as mental illness has a way of alienating family and friends. It is exhausting to care for someone with such a devastating illness. A significant number of the homeless are homeless because of mental illness. And yes, the stigma of mental illness is very much alive and well in society today.

My family has been touched by mental illness, when one of my daughter's friends was shot to death by the police in his driveway, while his younger brothers and his parents watched from inside the house. He was only 19 and was newly diagnosed with mental illness. My mother has suffered from depression and social phobia her entire life, and is addicted to benzodiazepines. One of my best friends' husband attempted suicide last year.

The thing is, a psych nurse was venting about the hardships of her job. Nothing more. There is no way on this earth that I could do psych nursing. The few psych patients I care for exhaust the hell out of me. I have a great deal of admiration for those with more fortitude than I have, and if such a person needs to vent once in a while, I will support that need. To me, venting about a psych patient's behavior is no different than me, a cardiac nurse, venting about the patient who has a heart attack and subsequent stent placement, who insists on going outside to smoke, and whose family members bring them McDonald's to eat. These are frustrations of our jobs as nurses, and we should be safe to vent about our frustrations here, on a forum dedicated to nurses.

I really wanted to say something to the poster but didn't know how not to sound mean. I think you did a great job.

Yes, this is a vent forum. Yes, some of what we say MAY offend others if it's taken personally. Ultimately, though, we endure one of the most stressful jobs in the U.S. (and other countries). If we can't vent amongst our peers without fear of reprisal, then we suck it up and become the burned out nurses that have contribued to the nursing shortage.

To everyone who gets offended: Please remember that, although the situations may hit too close to home, we're not intending to offend anyone -- even out patients about whom we are speaking. We need a place to keep our own sanity lest we become one of our patients -- whether suffering medically or psychologically.

[ShelleyERgirl, LPN]

This is such a great thread!!! My husband is a Paramedic and believes Blow dart Ativan/Versed should be allowed. And we should replace the bathroom air fresheners that are set @ a specific time with Paxil or __________ insert your med of choice. We would have such a happy helpful pt population, .

Love it! I have been trying to get a Valium salt lick in my waiting room for years.

[Virgo_RN, BSN, RN]

I really don't want it to appear as if I were dismissing that person's experience. She is dealing with an incredibly difficult situation, and as such, her feelings are very close to the surface. This is understandable, and my heart goes out to her. However, our need to vent our frustrations about our work in a safe forum in which we can do so without being judged harshly is something that I think deserves some consideration.

[eriksoln, BSN, RN]

I really don't want it to appear as if I were dismissing that person's experience. She is dealing with an incredibly difficult situation, and as such, her feelings are very close to the surface. This is understandable, and my heart goes out to her. However, our need to vent our frustrations about our work in a safe forum in which we can do so without being judged harshly is something that I think deserves some consideration.

I do agree with the idea the we need to have a degree of freedom to vent to peers. One of my biggest criticisms of nursing is that we are all in such a hurry to tear each other down. No wonder no one else thinks very highly of us. We do a wonderfull job of tainting the profession all on our own.

Heard it put this way once: "Ever hear the saying........Give them enough rope and they will hang themselves? When it comes to nursing..........Give them five minutes to speak and they will hang themselves."

But dont entirely discount the other advantage to venting with peers. Yes, there are times I am simply letting out some neg. energy. A lot of times though, I am ranting about some "thing" that I can not for the life of me handle or solve. I rant, make outrageous and belittleing statements, and my peers "reel me back in". I get the flaws in my attitude pointed out to me, suggestions on better ways to handle the situation are given to me, and I learn from the experience. My meaning is, sometimes I am looking to be corrected when I rant. I've developed ineffective coping mechanisms and dont know how to do anything better or how to ask how others do it. So, the process I described above takes place and, hopefully I learn something.

So, yes, having free range to vent to our peers is imperative. But being able to do so without some chance of having our shortcomings pointed out is useless. In fact, I'd follow, those who vent without opportunity to grow from new views on the matter are the ones most likely to grow into the bitter, burnt out nurse we are trying to avoid becoming when we vent.

Of course, the process I described above does rely on the one we are venting to giving constructive criticism. I do see people, in here and in the clinical setting, get WAY to high and mighty about pointing out things others could do differently.

Not sure this helps or even applies, but, its just my experience and opinion.

[ghillbert, MSN, NP]

Dear pt's son, yes I understand that it sucks that the nursing home is requiring your dad to pay for his care. No, I don't think it's a good idea for you to sign him out AMA and take him home, considering last time you continued to go to work and left him laying in crap on the couch, unable to walk, eat or toilet himself. Oh, also I wasn't too impressed that he woke you up to say he was having a stroke at 2am and you didn't call an ambulance until 8am when you left for work without waiting for the ambulance. So yes, I do think it's really necessary for you to leave dad in care. Oh, and of course it's a great idea for him to remain a full code.. who wouldn't want to live like that?

[badphish]

From the streets of paramedicine:

what id like to say:

why don't you get in one of the three cars in the driveway and take yourself to the hospital for _______ (sore throat, boo boo on finger, etc)

THanks for waiting till 3 am to call 911 for chest pain you've had since 4 pm.

What would you do back home for a runny nose? (tourists)

What were you thinking when u stuck item a into opening b

Why did you bring wheel-chair bound grand-ma with u to Disney? Is she gonn ride magic mountain?

thank you for touching every piece of equipment in the truck with your bleeding hand... we love to hose down the inside of the truck.

complaining about the driver/rough ride only makes it rougher...

are we here for your tummy ache or for a broken leg because for some reason u cant walk now..

what is it about my stretcher that causes paralysis from the waist down???

it is too hot/cold in the back of the ambulance i only do that to mess with u

no im only starting this IV in the back of a moving truck to show what a stud I am...

[DeepFriedRN]

Love it! I have been trying to get a Valium salt lick in my waiting room for years.

Living in a rural area, I've often looked up at the airplanes dusting the crops, and thought, "hmmm, if we filled that bad boy up with ativan...." :chuckle

[JBudd, MSN]

I've been asking for "Ativan-ina-can" for years but the pharmacist hasn't ordered it in yet.

In reply to "I'm not really like this, its just that cop's (was EMS actually) attitude!"........ If you're not like this, why are you being like this? as we apply 4 points leathers .............

[olli975]

Hmm... Can you just realize how many patients we have and how busy we are? can you prioritize: this I could do myself or have a family member/friend do for me and this is important, so I need to call RN... can you remember to ask MD your questions and not me right after MD leaves... even if you are upset or angry, can you please not pass it on me... Hmm, I would like to tell patients that I am not doing nursing for money, because otherwise I would chose a better paid filed, I am not scared of them reporting me or talking to my manger because I am trying to do my best at all times, I am not scared of lawyers because I am surrounded by them myself... I am just doing this because I like to help people... and I think that they should also at least appreciate it

[a "too caring" c]

I feel sorry for you nrsang97. Hold on to "your baby".

[SassyJennRN]

oh man i just finished all 64 pages...most days for me i would love to just stare at them blank looked and say " ARE YOU FREAKIN KIDDING ME" and turn and walk away. or "it is now 2pm and I have not eaten, drank, sat or peed since 6am and you want to complain to me that you only like a half a pitcher of ice not a full one."