I came home really upset the other day by how absolutely insensitive patients and their families can be. I'm sure this is probably my fault, because I am very friendly and nice ( most of the time) so people feel comofrtable talking to me about pretty much anything. I used to work on the floor, where the turn around of patients was not that great comparing to the ER. Downstairs is a different story.
I get multiple questions on daily basis regarding were I'm from, how long I've been here, etc. because of my accent - that i can not hide or change, but then it seems not enough and they ask me about my parents. This is a sore subject, because I have lived on my own since I was 15, my father was not there and my mother neglected me and sometimes abused me since I was 9. I haven't seen her in 14 years since I left Moscow and the last thing I want to discuss are my feelings for her and what her life is like a psych unit. Even though I say that I don't want to talk about it, this is not enough. People continue to dig.
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Another problem is when I don't understand what the person is trying to tell me, because they are actually not very smart or funny, they blame it on lack of my English skills, even though I finished college in the US with honors.
They ask me if I am a mail-order bride,( after they question me about my wedding ring), which is also insulting. And no, I am not. I met my husband at work.
Then there comes the religion problem. People feel absolutely compelled to ask me if I am Jewish or a Russian Orthodox and i am neither, because even though I tried "welcoming Jesus into my life " during the nightmare Of my childhood it just never happened. So, then the people feel it is OK to say to me how I am going to go to hell, that i need to pray and go to church. These attacks on my right to believe or not, come exclusively from the white poplulation. Never have I had an ethnic individual impose thier views on me with such vengence.
And all of this is happening while I am trying to whipe this person's butt or be sympathetic to their abdominal pain or chest pain and it is VERY hard to do after someone just tore me apart. I tried lying, but people do not stop with questions even then.
I try to get out of the patients room quickly now or to reverse the questions at them, so they stop bothering me, but it only works some of the time.
It wasn't irrelevant, although you may have a point about it being a sweeping generalization about white Americans who subscribe to the evangelical mindset.
She stated that it was mostly the white patients who grilled her on religion and her dire eternal future, and I pointed out that typically this is the segment of the population who, if they are American evangelicals, feel it their duty to do so. They are, in fact, taught to consider themselves "unfaithful" if they don't make the attempt.
Just a statement of observation and personal experience, not an ethnic generality.
The cultural history of America originated with white, Anglo/Saxon males who felt themselves superior to not only women but to other cultures.
During the 1800's and 1900's especially, the religions they came over with mutated into a number of different variations, new religions grew up, such as Mormonism, Adventist, etc, with strong overtones of white male superiority, based not only on the economic class differences but their religious beliefs.
For those whose heritage is rooted in these mindsets of the superiority of white Western, particularly masculine culture, these discriminatory attitudes get passed down, passed on, and influence every aspect of a person's life until they don't stop to think of how their particular mindset affects others with whom they interact.
While certainly not every white person conforms to a sweeping generalization any more than every Black, Hispanic, or Middle Eastern person would, there are cultural norms of each group that tend to hold sway with that person's interaction with others whether or not they realize it.
These are the things we deal with when we interact with people of other cultures, and this is the reason we should all learn to treat ourselves and all around us with respect, whether they return the favor or not.
It wasn't irrelevant, although you may have a point about it being a sweeping generalization about white Americans who subscribe to the evangelical mindset.
She stated that it was mostly the white patients who grilled her on religion and her dire eternal future, and I pointed out that typically this is the segment of the population who, if they are American evangelicals, feel it their duty to do so. They are, in fact, taught to consider themselves "unfaithful" if they don't make the attempt.
Just a statement of observation and personal experience, not an ethnic generality.
The cultural history of America originated with white, Anglo/Saxon males who felt themselves superior to not only women but to other cultures.
During the 1800's and 1900's especially, the religions they came over with mutated into a number of different variations, new religions grew up, such as Mormonism, Adventist, etc, with strong overtones of white male superiority, based not only on the economic class differences but their religious beliefs.
For those whose heritage is rooted in these mindsets of the superiority of white Western, particularly masculine culture, these discriminatory attitudes get passed down, passed on, and influence every aspect of a person's life until they don't stop to think of how their particular mindset affects others with whom they interact.
While certainly not every white person conforms to a sweeping generalization any more than every Black, Hispanic, or Middle Eastern person would, there are cultural norms of each group that tend to hold sway with that person's interaction with others whether or not they realize it.
These are the things we deal with when we interact with people of other cultures, and this is the reason we should all learn to treat ourselves and all around us with respect, whether they return the favor or not.
Thanks for lengthy inservice on the sins of the White race and the patriarchal, racist religions they founded.
What I gleaned from you post is that White Anglo Saxon men have culturally dominated this nation with their patriarchal, sexist, racist ways. You seem to be inferring that they are unique in their feelings of superiority over other people, and this racist and sexist agenda is a prime factor in the founding of both the LDS and Seventh Day Adventist Church (even though the founder of the SDA, Ellen G White, was a woman).
Specializes in Clinical Research, Outpt Women's Health.
Yikes. I would just tell them all that you were born here and lived here your whole life and the accent is actually a speech impediment. That ought to shut them up!
You seem to imply that it was in the 1800's that patriarchy finally began to influence religion thanks to White Anglo Saxon men, with the founding of new, Christian based sects. Heh, heh, I find that rather amusing. :chuckle
Yikes. I would just tell them all that you were born here and lived here your whole life and the accent is actually a speech impediment. That ought to shut them up!
Thanks for lengthy inservice on the sins of the White race and the patriarchal, racist religions they founded.
jlsRN & KLKRN,
Would you please kindly take your debate elsewhere? I'm sure the OP did not intend for her thread to be hijacked into a debate regarding white (or any other ethnic group) and their religions.
However, I'm sure OP appreciates your input regarding her problem with nosy patients and their families.
Specializes in Day Surgery, Agency, Cath Lab, LTC/Psych.
I would kill them with kindness. With a generous smile on your face you could say, "Oh, I never discuss my personal life or history in the clinical setting." Then, smile again and leave the room. They should get the point. If they keep asking and badgering you can reiterate, "Like I said, I do not discuss my personal life."
KLKRN, RN
196 Posts
It wasn't irrelevant, although you may have a point about it being a sweeping generalization about white Americans who subscribe to the evangelical mindset.
She stated that it was mostly the white patients who grilled her on religion and her dire eternal future, and I pointed out that typically this is the segment of the population who, if they are American evangelicals, feel it their duty to do so. They are, in fact, taught to consider themselves "unfaithful" if they don't make the attempt.
Just a statement of observation and personal experience, not an ethnic generality.
The cultural history of America originated with white, Anglo/Saxon males who felt themselves superior to not only women but to other cultures.
During the 1800's and 1900's especially, the religions they came over with mutated into a number of different variations, new religions grew up, such as Mormonism, Adventist, etc, with strong overtones of white male superiority, based not only on the economic class differences but their religious beliefs.
For those whose heritage is rooted in these mindsets of the superiority of white Western, particularly masculine culture, these discriminatory attitudes get passed down, passed on, and influence every aspect of a person's life until they don't stop to think of how their particular mindset affects others with whom they interact.
While certainly not every white person conforms to a sweeping generalization any more than every Black, Hispanic, or Middle Eastern person would, there are cultural norms of each group that tend to hold sway with that person's interaction with others whether or not they realize it.
These are the things we deal with when we interact with people of other cultures, and this is the reason we should all learn to treat ourselves and all around us with respect, whether they return the favor or not.