Got to thinking about this one today, and was reminded of it when I read another thread on here...what's teh dumbest thing you've ever heard in nursing, as an explanation for a malady?
For example, the one that sticks out for me is one that I heard as a new nurse, many moons ago. I was doing an assessment on a patient, and a family member of said patient had her sone with her, who was profoundly mentally and physically handicapped. Of course, I would have never presumed to ask the nature of his complaint, but she was only too happy to volunteer it.
"When he was born, the nurse in the room had long fingernails and she scratched his head. That's why he's like this. It's all her fault. We tried to sue her, but the judge threw out the case."
I was stunned, to say the least, and didn't challenge it as hogwash outright, but I did ask,
"Did she puncture his scalp with her nails?"
"No, she just scratched him on the head. It didn't show, but she did it."
You can bet money I was VERY thorough with that assessment. Heaven forbid the lady get staph or some other dread condition because my hair or eyelashes were too long.
Anyone else ever heard a completely absurd reasoning for someone's ailments?
Had a phone call one night from a guy who said he had been in our ER the evening before for a UTI. They gave him a prescription for abx but he wasn't any better yet. Asked how many of the pills he had taken so far and he said one. When did he take it? Thirty minutes ago.
Isn't amazing that people can actually dress themselves - lol
Specializes in med-surg, psych, ER, school nurse-CRNP.
And then there was the sister who accompanied a patient to her office visit. I knew we were in trouble the second she whipped a list out of her purse, and I was right.
"Ok, Miss, I want her treated for A, B, C, D, E, F, and G." (Not checked, TREATED)
"Patient are you having X, Y, z signs/symptoms?"
"No, none of those."
"Sister, why do you think Patient needs to be treated for all this?"
"Well, I have them."
"And?"
"And she's my sister."
Things like high cholesterol, osteoporosis, heart problems, diabetes...all of which tests had previously come back negative for. She needed to be treated even in the clinical absence of the disease, because Sister had them.
My ex mother in law had a son die as a small child of some unknown reason. Keep in mind she was from West Virginia and this was the 60's.
"My son was never right after he was born, and died as a small child. It was because I was walking to work while pregnant and stepped in a puddle. The germs from the puddle when straight to the babies brain......"
Specializes in med-surg, psych, ER, school nurse-CRNP.
The funniest one I have heard lately was from the wife of a duo who mean well, and who I'm sure are really sweet..but God bless, they are annoying! Every time they come in, it's something. Time before, their daughter was being bullied at school (horrible, but not really an issue for your doc to address), and the last time, the chief complaint was that the wife had found a second-uncle or some such relation dead in the bathtub (again, horrible, but nothing to do).
I always have to be "rescued" by staff with these two, because they will NOT shut up. Ever. This time was no different, the med assistant practically had to drag me from the room. The wife just KEPT on talking, about her flowers, about the heat, about who was up in the next election...and finally, as we get them ushered to the door, she looks at me and goes...
"Angelfire, do you think Daddy's (her hubby) blood pressure is causing my anxiety?"
I was nice and shook my head.
But as soon as they left, the med assistant and I said at the same time,
"No, but I bet your 'anxiety' is causing Daddy's high blood pressure."
Ok.... just got back from YouTube- not nursing at all... it was a video of former Russian gymnasts- an homage of sorts to how good they were in the iron curtain days..... one of the comments asked if the 'vid' had to do with the "Sovient Reunion".... :smackingf
:eek:
xtxrn, ASN, RN
4,267 Posts
Isn't amazing that people can actually dress themselves - lol