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Texas school sets dress code for parents

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by kidzcare kidzcare (Member)

kidzcare has 5 years experience .

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ruby_jane has 10 years experience as a BSN, RN and specializes in ICU/community health/school nursing.

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Desperately waiting from someone from Houston to weigh in...

I wish that parents would take this to heart. They won't. There's a reason behind this (even if people think it's classist). You cannot tell me that a mom with nicely done nails and an IPhone cannot afford a shirt that covers her top and pants that cover her bottom. Head coverings are a little different.

Also I salute this principal. It's the hill she's chosen to die on, apparently...and I wish I could tell her my motto: You cannot care more than their parents do.

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CampyCamp has 18 years experience as a RN.

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Of course the cost concern isn't about having shirts that cover a person't bottom or pants instead of pajamas, it's referring to the mother who was kicked out because she was wearing a scarf or bonnet, a common way for women of color to protect hair and keep the overall appearance tidy between costly treatments and braiding. Ethnic hair is expensive just by existing. Then you have dress codes all over the place telling people that if we don't straighten, relax, and beat our hair into complying with white standards of beauty, we must go home. 

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MHDNURSE has 21 years experience as a BSN, MSN, RN, NP and specializes in Pediatrics, Community, and School Health.

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20 hours ago, OldDude said:

one with "Porn Queen" across the back of her pink shorts

We had a family come in to register their kid for school and their little girl who could not have been more than 4 years old had "sexy" in bling across the butt of her ultra short booty shorts 😭

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ruby_jane has 10 years experience as a BSN, RN and specializes in ICU/community health/school nursing.

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12 minutes ago, CampyCamp said:

Of course the cost concern isn't about having shirts that cover a person't bottom or pants instead of pajamas, it's referring to the mother who was kicked out because she was wearing a scarf or bonnet, a common way for women of color to protect hair and keep the overall appearance tidy between costly treatments and braiding. Ethnic hair is expensive just by existing. Then you have dress codes all over the place telling people that if we don't straighten, relax, and beat our hair into complying with white standards of beauty, we must go home. 

That did bother me, TBH. The red scarf the lady in the interview was wearing should be acceptable to the school. I think it's more than that.  I looked this morning in our drop off line and saw a lot of parents in jammies and curlers - but they weren't getting out of the car. And I know that on more than one occasion I did drop-off in my PJs.  I suspect the issue is people walking into school like that.

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kidzcare has 5 years experience.

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20 hours ago, OldDude said:

I really think parent dress code is at the bottom of the list of things to be concerned about.

For real! There are bigger fish to fry. 

 

25 minutes ago, CampyCamp said:

Of course the cost concern isn't about having shirts that cover a person't bottom or pants instead of pajamas, it's referring to the mother who was kicked out because she was wearing a scarf or bonnet, a common way for women of color to protect hair and keep the overall appearance tidy between costly treatments and braiding. Ethnic hair is expensive just by existing. Then you have dress codes all over the place telling people that if we don't straighten, relax, and beat our hair into complying with white standards of beauty, we must go home. 

I was thinking of this too. Same with protective hair styles (e.g., braiding) not being allowed for students. 

How is a scarf or a bonnet any different than a parent coming to the school with a baseball cap on? Or someone with Caucasian hair wearing a bun to avoid having to style their hair that day?

 

24 minutes ago, MHDNURSE said:

We had a family come in to register their kid for school and their little girl who could not have been more than 4 years old had "sexy" in bling across the butt of her ultra short booty shorts 😭

Why does this clothing item even exist? Gross. Stop sexualizing children. 

I have a 14 year old daughter and she wears leggings and a sweat shirt everyday. Every single day. While I sometimes wish she would wear something more flattering, I'd much rather have her wearing that than begging to wear low cut shirts and booty shorts. 

Edited by kidzcare

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ruby_jane has 10 years experience as a BSN, RN and specializes in ICU/community health/school nursing.

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1 minute ago, kidzcare said:

 

How is a scarf or a bonnet any different than a father coming to the school with a baseball cap on? Or a woman with Caucasian hair wearing a bun to avoid having to style their hair that day?

 

Thank you. That's a good point.

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OldDude specializes in Pediatrics.

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4 minutes ago, kidzcare said:

...Stop sexualizing children...

"Dance Moms"

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MHDNURSE has 21 years experience as a BSN, MSN, RN, NP and specializes in Pediatrics, Community, and School Health.

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55 minutes ago, CampyCamp said:

Of course the cost concern isn't about having shirts that cover a person't bottom or pants instead of pajamas, it's referring to the mother who was kicked out because she was wearing a scarf or bonnet, a common way for women of color to protect hair and keep the overall appearance tidy between costly treatments and braiding. Ethnic hair is expensive just by existing. Then you have dress codes all over the place telling people that if we don't straighten, relax, and beat our hair into complying with white standards of beauty, we must go home. 

100%  We have had local stories on the news where students of color were facing disciplinary action for wearing hair braids and extensions:

https://btu.org/mystic-valley-charter-makes-news-time-racist-disciplinary-practices/

Thankfully this news sparked outrage and their hair policies were overturned:

https://www.bostonglobe.com/metro/2017/08/11/mystic-valley-charter-school-eliminates-controversial-hair-rules/iRKY5eQ0S0EedNK9rSwqEM/story.html

And we also heard the national story about a New Jersey wrestler who was forced to cut out his dreadlocks or forfeit his match...

It is a very slippery slope to walk down once schools begin deciding what is "acceptable" and what isn't when cultural considerations are not taken into account.  I am very blessed to be in a school where Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion are top priorities (just attended my 5th mandatory two hour PD of the year on DEI yesterday).  

Anyway, I could go on and on about this, but wanted to say I totally hear you.

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kidzcare has 5 years experience.

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1 hour ago, OldDude said:

"Dance Moms"

yep. 

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19 hours ago, ruby_jane said:

Also I salute this principal. It's the hill she's chosen to die on, apparently...and I wish I could tell her my motto: You cannot care more than their parents do.

So true! I do not live far from Houston but this rule I understand but to enforce I think it is a waste of time. Parents are going to do and wear what they want. 

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babyNP. has 10 years experience and specializes in NICU.

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Besides the racist & classist head covering rule...what will the soccer moms do if they can't wear their yoga pants??? 

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I read an interview with the principal who stated that the code was put in place to help foster a "real world" atmosphere in the school - i.e. this is not a place to goof around, going to school is serious and is meant to prepare you for college/workforce/adult responsibilities.

In response to that, I would say that being exposed to a variety of styles, wardrobes, self-expressions, and ethnic or racial standards of beauty IS fostering a "real world" atmosphere. Kids should be exposed to it all, and they can form their own opinions  (especially HS-age). 

On another note, everyone has pretty much hit the points that resonate with me as wrong about this code, but some of the language seems to directly target black women, and the code does not account for emergencies or enforcement standards. It's problematic at best and racist at worst. 

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