Suddenly shy, scared, not confident... help!

JentheRN05, RN · Aug 26, 2005

I guess this is mostly a vent but if anyone can give me advice on how they got over similar feelings I'd be much appreciative.
I haven't even started school yet but I took a PT job as an aide/clerk. I'm 28 and I've worked with people a lot in the past in customer service positions. I really enjoyed those positions and never thought of myself as shy before.
However, now I've worked exactly 12 hours in my new job and I feel terrified with the patients! I've never worked in health care before and I feel stupid and afraid of everything. I don't know how the beds work, what exactly I should be doing during team lifts, what all the lines/IV's and such are hooked up to patients, what I can touch, what I can't... It's sooooooo stressful. I'm afraid to do anything without being told -- because I'm deathly afraid I'll hurt someone or make some horrid error -- but at the same time I obviously don't want it to appear that I'm lazy or have a bad attitude.
One of the things that has really caught me off guard is how LOUDLY everyone talks to the patients. I understand that a lot of the people are hard of hearing but I really have trouble speaking so loudly to them; I feel like I'm yelling at them. I'm accustomed to using a smooth, polite "telemarketer" voice when dealing with customers. Instead I'm listening to my trainer converse with an elderly patient and it sounds like, "NANCY DID THEY GIVE YOU YOUR SEDATION YET?" *taps patient on shoulder repeatedly* "NANCY? NANCY? NANCY DID THEY...." and I'm just dumbfounded thinking that I will never possibly be able to be that, hmmm, I dont' want to say aggressive but perhaps "assertive" with a patient.
Have any of the rest of you felt shell-shocked after your first couple of days in the clinical environment? I feel totally off-kilter and not confident and it's really stressing me out. I'm going in for a full day tomorrow and while I feel excited I also have knots in my stomach like I were going to be giving a presentation instead of going to work.
Oh, and if you read this far, thanks for listening. It felt good just to get that off my chest :)

All I can say is 3 words - QUESTIONS QUESTIONS QUESTIONS. Or ASK ASK ASK or the less used HELP HELP HELP.

Truly transitioning is a very very hard thing to do. You will get used to it, just ask alot of questions, you'll do fine

Jen

leopold · Aug 26, 2005

You might try talking with your voice at a deep pitch. It's easier for hard of hearing residents to hear and you don't have to scream. Also, I find that when I concentrate on talking like that I speak more slowly and calmly.

As for your reaction to your job, don't worry! I cried every night for a month when I first started working as an aide. I hated asking for help, it seemed like I was being bothersome, but eventually I learned how important teamwork is and saw how people would jump at the chance to help each other.

I was also scared to death about the consequences of what I was doing, to this day I have to psych myself up for a few minutes just to give a shower, I am so scared with that slick floor that someone (including me) might fall.

You will be fine. It sounds like you are a very conscientious person and are very aware of the importance of what you're doing. Just relax, agree to allow yourself an adjustment period and everything will be OK. :)

Super_RN, BSN, RN · Aug 26, 2005

It's a new job, things will fall into place, believe me. My first afternoon at a LTC as an aide was scarier than hell, but I survived. A year and a half later I got my RN license and started out in ICU, which was also scarier than all get-out. A whole new ballgame. The point is, I adapted to the new environments, you will too with time I had never had anything to do with healthcare before my aide job, just nursing clinicals. Asking questions is wonderful!!! I would most definitely work with someone 100 times over that asked questions when they were unsure versus working with someone who just assumed and did their own thing. Asking questions does not make you look dumb; however, I will tell you that if you don't ask questions and then sit out of busy situations, it won't look good. This is a great opportunity to learn, don't be afraid!

Good luck!! Jaime

Aunt Minnie · Aug 26, 2005

Thanks guys! It really does help to hear about other people's experiences. I already feel better after having read your stories and advice! School hasn't started yet so I don't really have any other students to vent to and none of my friends work in healthcare. Sometimes I think I expect myself to be super-woman or something and think I should automatically know how to do everything and not be nervous and never make a mistake or ask a silly-ish question... it's nice to know that I'm not alone in feeling this anxiety!

I read on another post here at allnurses (somewhere) that someone's preceptor had basically told her that if you're not making mistakes (as a new nurse or what not) then it's because you're not doing enough! I'm trying to keep that in mind when I get nervous thinking about every way possible that I could mess things up :)

I'm so glad to hear that though you were all nervous at first, things worked out for you at your jobs! It definitely calms me down and gives me hope!

Mommy TeleRN, RN · Aug 26, 2005

I also have no medical background. Today at our hospital training the speaker started a story about too much water in a foley catheter, too little drawn out, and I guess the student pulled out a partially deflated catheter. Anyway, most of the crowd was gasping and sort of laughing as they knew where the story was going...I had NO CLUE what they were talking about as I only know a foley catheter is a catheter..didn't know you used water to inflate/deflate. I felt like it just went over my head and I was the only person not getting the punchline. By the end of the story I put 2 & 2 together but it just reminded me so much that my peers have overall more knowledge starting out than I do

lunakat · Aug 27, 2005

I also have no medical background. Today at our hospital training the speaker started a story about too much water in a foley catheter, too little drawn out, and I guess the student pulled out a partially deflated catheter. Anyway, most of the crowd was gasping and sort of laughing as they knew where the story was going...I had NO CLUE what they were talking about as I only know a foley catheter is a catheter..didn't know you used water to inflate/deflate. I felt like it just went over my head and I was the only person not getting the punchline. By the end of the story I put 2 & 2 together but it just reminded me so much that my peers have overall more knowledge starting out than I do

I am in my 3rd semster and this kind of stuff happens to me all the time, I don't work in a hospital yet and they do. However, I have discovered I am not the only who is lost when certain things are said. Pretty soon you'll be the one telling stories that go over other peoples heads. it just takes time.

TashaLPN2006RN2012, ASN, RN · Aug 27, 2005

Did you take the CNA classes? i know they helped me a TON! Everything was broken down and we had clinicals as well. I actully let my registry lapse so im retaking the classes again to get back in the groove of things...just a suggestion!

tasha

IvoryLena · Aug 27, 2005

I guess this is mostly a vent but if anyone can give me advice on how they got over similar feelings I'd be much appreciative.
I haven't even started school yet but I took a PT job as an aide/clerk. I'm 28 and I've worked with people a lot in the past in customer service positions. I really enjoyed those positions and never thought of myself as shy before.
However, now I've worked exactly 12 hours in my new job and I feel terrified with the patients! I've never worked in health care before and I feel stupid and afraid of everything. I don't know how the beds work, what exactly I should be doing during team lifts, what all the lines/IV's and such are hooked up to patients, what I can touch, what I can't... It's sooooooo stressful. I'm afraid to do anything without being told -- because I'm deathly afraid I'll hurt someone or make some horrid error -- but at the same time I obviously don't want it to appear that I'm lazy or have a bad attitude.
One of the things that has really caught me off guard is how LOUDLY everyone talks to the patients. I understand that a lot of the people are hard of hearing but I really have trouble speaking so loudly to them; I feel like I'm yelling at them. I'm accustomed to using a smooth, polite "telemarketer" voice when dealing with customers. Instead I'm listening to my trainer converse with an elderly patient and it sounds like, "NANCY DID THEY GIVE YOU YOUR SEDATION YET?" *taps patient on shoulder repeatedly* "NANCY? NANCY? NANCY DID THEY...." and I'm just dumbfounded thinking that I will never possibly be able to be that, hmmm, I dont' want to say aggressive but perhaps "assertive" with a patient.
Have any of the rest of you felt shell-shocked after your first couple of days in the clinical environment? I feel totally off-kilter and not confident and it's really stressing me out. I'm going in for a full day tomorrow and while I feel excited I also have knots in my stomach like I were going to be giving a presentation instead of going to work.
Oh, and if you read this far, thanks for listening. It felt good just to get that off my chest :)

I think me and you were seperated at birth. I had no medical exp. before entering the program and now im in my last year and still feel scared to do anything in clinical. Although I will say, when I think back about how shy I was it was mostly due to the fact I really had no idea what I was supposed to do. But as each semester goes by I feel more confident and in return I do things much better in clinical. Ive even had my peers and teacher comment on how much more assertive I am now than at the beginning of the program. I still have a long way to go, but I think it will come to me the more clinical I experience. Ive felt this way before as a caricature artist at busch gardens. At first I didnt want to draw anyone, everyone was rude and said I didnt know how to draw/ or dont go to her she sucks:sniff: . But by the end of my first year I wasnt shy anymore and I became one of the best artists in my park and I train the new people now:smokin: ! I think of nursing the same way, you will get over your shyness just give yourself some time. :wink2:

Super_RN, BSN, RN · Aug 27, 2005

I think me and you were seperated at birth. I had no medical exp. before entering the program and now im in my last year and still feel scared to do anything in clinical. Although I will say, when I think back about how shy I was it was mostly due to the fact I really had no idea what I was supposed to do. But as each semester goes by I feel more confident and in return I do things much better in clinical. Ive even had my peers and teacher comment on how much more assertive I am now than at the beginning of the program. I still have a long way to go, but I think it will come to me the more clinical I experience. Ive felt this way before as a caricature artist at busch gardens. At first I didnt want to draw anyone, everyone was rude and said I didnt know how to draw/ or dont go to her she sucks:sniff: . But by the end of my first year I wasnt shy anymore and I became one of the best artists in my park and I train the new people now:smokin: ! I think of nursing the same way, you will get over your shyness just give yourself some time. :wink2:

It's easier to become more assertive when you know your stuff! Great job!

Jaime

Tweety, BSN, RN · Aug 27, 2005

Entirely normal feelings. Hang in there, it gets better. Good luck.

Super_RN, BSN, RN · Aug 27, 2005

Entirely normal feelings. Hang in there, it gets better. Good luck.

I agree! I also just wanted to add that someone who walks in completely confident, who has never held a healthcare job or a healthcare job of an entirely different nature is

1) ignorant of what really goes on behind the scenes

and

2) SCARY!!!! :devil: